|Reviews for Tranquil Violence|
| Shadow Tricked chapter 25 . 5/6/2015
This chapter totally ruined the whole story for me, it was meant to be gohan/videl and had even built towards that then you have 17 and videl make out? What the hell
| UltimateGoham chapter 27 . 4/20/2015
I feel like someone was taking out there anger when writing this chapter.
| ThatFanFicGuy chapter 27 . 4/17/2015
Ugh, where do I begin? Like I said in my last review, Mark isn't exactly my favorite. Everything he does could have easily been done by his sister without distracting from the major plot elements you wanted to set up. Heck, Videl barely has anything to do with the story in comparison to Mark, despite the summery of the fic, ironically, being about Videl stepping out of the shadow of her family!
Everything Mark does screams "Videl's character fits into this better!" She works with the police, she's distrustful and is always trying to see who people really are, and plays detective far to much. Finding out what's going on in the plot seems better tailored for her character. But despite that, she and Gohan are kinda side characters in their own fic. I think Seventeen got more time devoted to him in the second half then Gohan did, and Mark was around and did a lot more than Videl for the entire story.
Now, despite my hatred for him, there are actually a lot more things wrong with this chapter.
Tao. Is he on steroids now? He nearly killed Seventeen with a peashooter! something that Raditz, the universal buttmonkey of low power levels isn't hurt by. Perhaps if I stretched my suspension of disbelief(this is a fanfic based on a series that features a green man that flies around in a turban that can shoot lasers from his fingers, it's not that hard) I could believe in some miner, microscopic design flaw Tao was lucky enough to hit, but then there is Gohan, who is powerful enough to destroy a planet if he sneezed hard enough, running away with Videl so that Mark can look selfless and heroic. And don't pretend it's anything but that, it's obvious that scene only happens to make Mark look good, even if he is beaten.
Could I imagine Gohan letting Mark fight Tao. Yes, actually. but to LEAVE someone who is no where near Tao's level to fight without someone to step in when Mark is down for the count? No. And the logic for it is stupid as well. He leaves to keep Videl protected, but leaves Mark to fight knowing Tao isn't allowed to kill any of Mr. Satan's kids. Videl is one of his kids, Tao isn't allowed to kill her, what's the entire point of running in the first place? Hell, you can't even decide on that point! Mark yells at Videl to run because Tao won't hesitate to kill her, but says he's fine because Tao knows better than to kill him because Mark's the son of the guy who hired him!
Krillin leaving Tao alive for Gohan to finish? again, I could maybe see that. Being slower than a bullet? No. Krillin as a child was so fast, he could do a dozen complex martial arts moves in so short a time, not even cameras could follow the speed, if I'm remembering the original Dragon Ball right(it may have just been the human eye, but I think there was cameras involved at one point). He should have been able to run all the way to Canada, grab some maple syrup, and still manage to get back in time to catch that bullet.
I'll admit, I'm a huge critic, But that's only because I like to see improvement, and I think people tend to improve from criticism rather than praise, because it lets them see their flaws and adjust to them. I can't write for crap, so perhaps I have no right to say this, but this last chapter was just... garbage. Not in the writing itself, but in the plot and characters.
It feels like you crammed five chapters worth of plot into a longer chapter than usual, and it shows. All those deaths? Meaningless since most of the people who died didn't even have names, and only seemed to happen to up drama and shock value. And Murphy's Law seemed to strike everyone but the villain, despite how outclassed he was. Everything any of the main characters did? Out of character idiot logic, as well as giving them all huge downgrades in skill and strength.
Maybe this review came to soon, maybe your epilogue will straighten a few things out and all my complaints(except Mark, I'm bound and determined to hate him now matter what you do with him) will disappear. I'll stick around to read that, and I'm hoping to Kami that it does get better.
| nancy103 chapter 27 . 4/17/2015
Well, this last chapter definitely lived up to the name of the story. There was extreme violence and death but with Gohan, he acted with a scary level of tranquility.
I found the ending more violent than I would have liked but this is your story and you can do as you please. I am sure the epilogue will shore up the mess with Hercule and the dojo but I also hope it solidifies Gohan and Videl.
| Guest chapter 27 . 4/17/2015
It was a great story, with a new, original and interesting idea.
It developed very well, following the growth of the characters. But.
The last 2 chapters (final part of the 26th and all of the 27th) are shit. After everything that was studied, calculated and finely developed, we arrive at the ambush of Tao, who takes down 17 with a weapon. What the hell? Did you forget that 17 is more powerful than a trained Super Saiyan? They are shot by even nukes and come out without a scratch! And then, Gohan, the most powerful being in the Universe, flees, leaving a kid who's barely trained to deal with an assassin that just brought down 17?
Then Tao kills a lot of random people, and Krillin, who can destroy planets on a whim, letshim go.
They can sense his power, but don't go directly after him. They could destroy him with less than1% of 1% of their power using their pinky finger, but are worried to face him.
And then, he is killed by an enraged Gohan. Alleulia.
The POV shift then to 17, who is still alive, only God knows how. Arrives Bulma with his father to pick him up and repair him, and then? The End. WHY? You didn't finish anything! Not the relationship and the trouble between Mark and Videl and Hercule; the love story between Videl and Gohan was only just starting, and the previous chapter hinted something long and interesting, but no.
The reactions of the Sensei to the killing of some of their students, what could have happened, what does the press say, ecc. ecc.
But nothing has been finished (a part of Tao). The story ends abruptly, in a very, very horrible way.
Loved the first 25-and-half chapters, hate the final.
I apologize for any error in my writing, I'm not mother tongue.
In case this comment was posted as guest, my account name is Anankin12 .
| Iwik chapter 27 . 4/16/2015
I think I'll keep my opinion till the epilogue is up. I liked the fighting and Mark's survival in this chapter but feel so confused about some stuff. And I hadn't expect it to end so suddenly, no final confrontations of the Satan's, no all out Dojo battle between Satan and Son. No actual romance between Gohan and Videl (17 even beats him to the punch).
But most of all I'm disappointed that the story is finished. I loved most of the chapters and anxiously waited for updates. Great job and I hope that the other TDS projects will get updated soon!
| Hyped chapter 27 . 4/16/2015
Wow, I can't believe it's over. I've been following this fic for a long time, and I enjoyed every bit of it. Great job, you guys!
| Tiffany0 chapter 27 . 4/15/2015
I feel like this needs a sequel more than an epilogue lol. Here's to hoping. :)
| ArmyWife22079 chapter 27 . 4/15/2015
That was a random ending, but will tie loose ends
| Riku Uzumaki chapter 27 . 4/15/2015
It looks like you amped up Tao's power by a lot if he was able to grievously wound Android 17 and get the drop on Krillin like that.
| Smithback chapter 27 . 4/15/2015
| Violet Ace chapter 27 . 4/15/2015
Wait, what? Everyone's dead and Mark and Videl haven't reconciled with their father. Or really moved on from him. Gohan barely acknowledged his feelings for Videl. The Dojo is a mess. It was a great chapter, but I hope you resolve these things in the Epilogue.
| Guest chapter 27 . 4/15/2015
-_- What did I expect, with the last chapter and everything. This chapter feels like it was trying to milk all the drama this story was lacking, however this story did not need ANY of it. Seventeen is made of metal and he can't lower his power level or operate with obsolete technology like gears or feel pain, he was, bar none, the worst target to 'kill' unless you wanted no one to die. Second, the WHOLE story highlighted how smart and strong the Z gang was and now they aren't for no reason. Krillin was weak he would know how strong Sharpner was, definitely after spending that much time as his sensei. He is much faster then a gun and all Z-Fighters have amazing reflexes from dodging ki-blasts so he wouldn't have been too slow. Third, Tao can sense ki so he should know how strong Gohan and Krillin are. Most importantly, is how dark the story got so quickly. Tao KILLED several people and Gohan and company was cool with it and no Sensu Beans to be heard, no 'Tranquil Violence' like he taught Mark to win either, just basically said "You killed Sharpner, you will die now", and kills him, like the other corpses don't matter in comparison. There a lot more problems with this chapter that I'm sure the other reviewer will address but this sounds like April Fools two weeks late and the Epilogue will be (Dragon balls, Go! All problems solved, THE END). Still, I did enjoy the other 26 chapter so I will thank you for that.
| Guest chapter 27 . 4/15/2015
Is this a joke? This is so far below the usual level of writing and plot that you guys normally put out that I feel like a 12 year old got access to this account and uploaded their own chapter.
| shugokage chapter 27 . 4/15/2015
Impressive scene and chapter!