|Reviews for Paramour|
| Jazz E. Roisin chapter 2 . 8/5
You captured Lily really well in this scene. Her strengh and James's compassion really worked well together. However, if they are at Hogwarts James can't sneak up to her room. The girl's staircase is enchanted to prevent such an ocassion.
I like that the tension between groups reaches further than James and Juniper. and that you are showing the impact of gossip. I hope to see more of Sirius and James's friendship later on.
1. "Her hair was up in an audacious BUN. "
~ Jazz E Roisin
| Jazz E. Roisin chapter 1 . 7/31
(You've been on my favorite author's list for so long! Here's a review for one of your stories. I put editorial suggestions in all caps so you could see the difference.)
I was intrigued from the moment I started reading. Juniper is well developed, in her personality and motives from the outset. I am intrigued to see her develop, and where the plot goes from this chapter. I think she may be a pure-blood or at least from high society to speak as she does.
You did a good job setting up James's reactions. I think you've captured his more mature nature. His calm reaction made the scene feel more intense than if he has thrown dishes or tried to attack her. I'm interested to see if the girl he's dating is Lily Evans or another original characters. I'll definitely be coming back to read and review the other chapters.
[Editorial Suggestions: I wrote your sentences word for word and put the edits in all caps so you could see them easier.]
1. That set him off. She knew and yet she continued. His breathing WAS quick and shallow.
2. He climbed off the BENCH and walked away from her with crisp, quick steps.
3. THAT her selflessness would be the end of her.
Awesome First Chapter!
~ Jazz E. Roisin
| pimentoplane chapter 4 . 4/23/2012
This whole thing is so beautiful and poignant. I love it to pieces.
| isigirl chapter 3 . 10/5/2011
wow this is really good and i would love to see where you take it :)
| peacock33 chapter 2 . 9/29/2011
This story is very intriguing so far and I can't wait to see what happens. Thanks for sharing and I hope we get more soon.
| Guest chapter 1 . 8/27/2011
I agree. Keep writing.
| Amy Halliwell chapter 1 . 8/27/2011
I dig it. You should continue.