|Reviews for Secret of the Pegasi|
| Angelina Barker chapter 1 . 11/9/2014
um ... did the herbs not work on Pinkie or something?
| mouch30 chapter 1 . 6/4/2012
That was quite a delightful story! Very creative, and the writing style is very professional. What an amusing little tale :3 The ending was just perfect!
| sparkie chapter 1 . 5/20/2012
LOL! but i prefure marewolf fictions!
| The Typhon Serpent chapter 1 . 12/9/2011
Lol, cute story with a very Pinkie Pie-esque ending. I enjoyed it :)
| Kieser chapter 1 . 9/1/2011
Very good job Theron. Very good. I love the plot and concept, as it is both interesting, and original. Although you could have gone a little more in depth with this secret, rather than leave a plot hole, which I expect and hope you are going to soon fill with a sequel! :D. Also, your writing style is spot on. It was all too easy for me to immerse myself in your story. No spelling or grammatical errors to speak of, that would otherwise pull me from the immersion. As well as the fact that you create imagery so vividly, e.g., "...as the pegasi read it, irises gradually shrinking...". This is something I enjoyed specifically, because it was all to easy to picture, as it happened frequently in the actual show. Props.
Now, for the avoidable downsides that mainly revolve around one problem. The plot holes. Don't call me a jerk for saying this but it's the one thing that bugged me, from an opinionated view. The story was a little too short. Which could have been easily fixed if you didn't skip an exciting scene that I'm sure, a lot of us were hoping to see. You skipped the alcohol scene. This scene could have opened up a lot of opportunities for fixing some plot holes, as well as giving your story a little (hopefully more) length. Plus the fact that by skipping this scene you created another.. I wouldn't say plot hole, but I'm sure a lot of us were wondering how Dash lost her wings, and how Pinkie attached them in the first place. Although, I'm sure you're going to fill in these holes with the exciting and very looked forward to sequel :D
All in all though, for everything that the story is, and not what it could have been, I'll give you a 4/5 stars :)
| Draco Dei chapter 1 . 8/31/2011
Reasonably good subversion of the "Dash injures her wings" thing. Not solving the mystery SEEMS like a bit of a cop-out at first, but I guess some mysteries are more fun unsolved. Does make one wonder if Pinkie Pie could use the wings only by virtue of being a reality warper, or if anyone could (yes, I know this was discussed in the story, still not a firm answer).
| Friendly Uncle chapter 1 . 8/29/2011
| C. Theron Vulpin chapter 1 . 8/28/2011
Re: RHJunior's review:
You obviously don't subscribe to the idea of the "Random Comedy" fic. It's just as legal to screw around with canon as it is to conform to it. I wrote this fic with the intention of playing "tin-whistle hell," as you put it, with the canon because it amuses me, and many others.
| RHJunior chapter 1 . 8/28/2011
Okay, a cute concept. But it triggers an almost atavistic rejection from a fan.
Part of the unspoken goal of writing fanfic is to make a story that could, conceivably, more or less fit into the canon. Either by relying on the spare room for new ideas found between lines and offscreen, or by making a story so well that it could mesh with the given canon seamlessly.
This one just... DOESN'T. One of the foundational blocks of MLP is that there are three distinct types of pony: pegasus, unicorn, and earth pony. This little ditty you've written plays merry tin-whistle hell with that, and about a billion other discrete plot issues. It's not merely non-canon, it's ANTI-canon... with every sentence requiring ever more elaborate justifications to make it work.
| MasterRaptor77 chapter 1 . 8/27/2011
That was a pretty neat story. Odd, but neat. Favorited.