Reviews for Confidence Trick
Primequis chapter 46 . 8/17/2013
- Overall I feel you do ultimately have talent and seem like the type who could probably benefit simply from more experience as a storyteller. That comes from just keeping writing and studying up on the craft, if you do care about it.
- As a whole, I do think this story could use a stronger plotline to it. More, as a whole, I felt myself just going game to game and I really don't feel much depth and heart to the characters to make them come alive. One thing I would suggest doing is studying up on characters and working on developing yours more.
- To note, for all criticism, don't see it as a bad thing. This is one of the fanfics I genuinely wished to take the time to read, which says enough for it. I actually think you've potential. What you lack is refinement. For instance, the approach with internal elements is a good start to things. I'll admit reading in 1st person present tense can get odd for me personally, but it's just because the sound of it is awkward to me. Anyway, as a whole, for fanfic, this is actually pretty fine and if you wanted to build it into something more, it's a good blueprint for something greater.
Primequis chapter 6 . 8/10/2013
- Actually like the decision here to have the game end in a draw. Really, character interaction that can spring from this from either viewpoint of continued antagonism or being forced to work as a team is a pretty intriguing concept to me. I hope you pull something cool with it! :)
Primequis chapter 3 . 8/10/2013
- Reading through this as of now and I really liked the hotel setup for this.
- The villain, not so much. There is 0 creativity or originality here. I'm fine with one taking inspiration from other things, but thus far this opening antagonist is a blatant ripoff, as opposed to simply being inspired by. He goes as far as to use the same logic and fundamental trick even. Part of me legit considered to stop reading here and now because of that. I'm going to continue on since my curiosity is still in play, but that was essentially the major strike for me.
- The game itself reminds me a bit of Limited Rock, Paper, Scissors from a manga I've read. In fact, thinking on it, the Professor is using the exact same trick as the first antagonist did, even with mistaken words.
- As of now, hoping this improves. I'm not saying you have to reinvent the wheel, of course. This is just TOO similar to other stories in the genre.
Devil Reader chapter 38 . 6/16/2013
Wohoo! A brilliant new game for Dana to play.
By the way, congratulations on your graduation. I just turned 18 and graduated from high school as well. Hopefully, I'll be able to get back into writing my fan fiction this summer.
Devil Reader chapter 28 . 5/28/2013
Yay! You updated and I like how the next round involves an airplane flight.I hope there will be a mini-game on the plane during the flight (if there are too many people who passed or some other reason).
Devil Reader chapter 31 . 1/15/2013
Interesting game ideas.
Mizumori Fumaira chapter 27 . 6/22/2012
wow, this story is unexpectedly good!

please update soon :)
mEEEm chapter 1 . 3/31/2012
Ooh suspensful start :D

Can't wait to read more