|Reviews for Red Head Stranger|
| Kairan1979 chapter 3 . 12/26/2011
Great, another story about Mary Sue.
| JDP95 chapter 4 . 9/17/2011
I have to say that I find this story very interesting and enjoyable. The way you write could use some improvement, but I'm sure you'll get there in time. You can, however, write fight scenes very well. It's definitely one of your strong points. Suicidal was a very interesting character and I hope you continue to refine her. Keep writing :)
| Jana Girl123 chapter 3 . 9/2/2011
Your character is a Mary Sue, at least she currently is. A Mary Sue is a character who is over-the-top perfect and exists to fulfill the fanciful thinking of the author and seems to perfect, to beautiful, unrealistic (come on, a bigger rack than PowerGirl?) and to stereotypical. The original Mary Sue was a fictional character in a set of fan written Star Trek stories where she out smarted Spock, slept with Kirk, saved the Universe, etc.
You have to be careful when you write OC's. They need to have both physical and emotional flaws, especially if they have no blood relation to an actual character. It's not to say that this story or your character is doomed, doing this can be easily fixed. Add more personality, tone down the appearance a tad, keep the actual characters in character (which you've been doing alright) and make your character more realistic.
This is not a flame, I swear. I'm trying to point out making your character one of (if not the absolute most) hated things on this site. The plot itself is alright and you have good grammar and nice spacing. However, if you keep this up with your character you will not only loose readers but be flamed. You have an opportunity to make this a great fic, so try to humanize your character to make her as good as your writing.
I hope you don't take this offensively since making you feel awful is far from what I'm trying to do. So please try to de-Sue Sarah and make her more human. Aside from the way you present her, this fic is fairly interesting. Update soon:)
| mimi chapter 3 . 9/2/2011
I really do lioe this stoy UPDATE SOOON!
| Robenson chapter 1 . 8/30/2011
Wow! I can't wait for the next chapter. The red head female character is a handful for sure.