|Reviews for Vis Insita|
| Brightly Bound chapter 33 . 9/24/2015
I didn't know you were editing your stories! Did you mention that in a previous a/n? Hmm. I must not be paying much attention. My apologies. I also haven't reviewed in a while. I have been too busy and sick and (mostly) lazy (though in my defense, I do everything on my phone, so typing this review is a bit of a bitch). So sorry! I know how much fun it is to get feedback on one's writing!
You also mentioned Tumblr in your a/n. Do you have an account on there? I tried to look you up. One blog with your exact pen name came up completely empty. The other one... well, let's just say there was a lot of meat and two veg and not much else. Eek!
Anyways, I enjoyed this chapter very much, though I liked the character interactions in the previous chapter more than the part about Scott and Lila's home turf in this one. (My phone auto-corrected turd to turf. Well done, phone!)
There aren't many new HP/GW fanfics coming out anymore (which is mostly why I write fanfiction myself- I love those two together), so I'll definitely reread TTM and VI soon! That small exchange between them in this chapter: "Just more of you to snog." I could die of happiness.
Keep up the good work!
| InfiniteDragon chapter 33 . 9/24/2015
Good chapter, I actually thought you did a great job showcasing 'their world' without making it seem overpowering (HUAW yay!), even if it was the primary focus of the chapter's second half.
Though the names make me wonder... ARE they (Kharadjai) not fully human...? Their cultures sure seem to overlap quite a lot, just from a very different technological and probably temporal standpoint...
The AN, however, made me cry. More from laughing than anything else, because now I hate you as much as that DAMNED TUNE, but... I don't even WATCH t.v. any more! Damn it!
| Guest chapter 3 . 9/24/2015
Well, I think a honest review is better than ten "I love you" ones, so I will be honest. First, the good things: The dialogues are good, and the fix is very well written... but... I think you had made some serious mistakes. 1. To put a too powerful character. It's not interesting see how some supernatural being solves all problems with his guns and bombs. 2. Harry Potter is not only about a war, but too about romantic relationships and friendships... And how this affect and is affected by the war circumstances (basically Harry ones). You had killed all possible romantic plots one by one, and the friendships are in not better shape. You had destroyed all Harry potter relationships "web" to put basically a static Harry-Sk friendship and not much more... Personally I don't like potter-with-guns, or macho super-characters who have no problem with murder and torture... In the end I only see two terrorists bands killing each other...
| coroamm chapter 32 . 9/9/2015
Great chapter. This story is the only reason I come to this site anymore. Hope your writer's block clears up soon. Thanks
| ScottIsMyFav chapter 32 . 8/29/2015
I'm going to begin this review by saying that Vis Insita and its predecessor, That Terrifying Momentum, are my absolute favourite fanfics of all time. Seriously. Bar none. I'm so glad I gave TTM a chance over a year ago - I've been following the series avidly since then. They're actually the only two stories I've saved a bookmark for on my browser. So kudos to you on this witty, incisively brilliant, cleverly tweaked retelling. You are without doubt my favourite fanfiction author (and quite frankly, you're pretty high up on my list of favourite authors too, because this series reads like an original piece).
Now, onto this chapter in particular.
I'm going to offer my own theory as to why Remus didn't change. Owing to the many, many times I've reread your story I remember when Remus visits Grimmauld Place (chapter 16 or 17 I think) and Sophie meets him in the park she takes his hand to check something.. at the time I supposed it was a way to 'read' if it was really him or something. But then I got to thinking... Kharadjai don't need to touch people physically to read the shape, so Sophie could have identified him without holding his hand. (This is as far as I got at the time before assuming we'd see the explanation in the next few chapters, and then I promptly forgot all about it). So it's possible she may have inadvertently (or on purpose, I don't know, but I'm leaning towards it being a happy accident) altered the Lycanthropy 'spell'. I've always understood it to be a 'curse' and an affliction in one - it has a magical base (I don't mean like a magical virus, though, it seems more like a spell that Transfigures you into a different creature) and we've seen before that a) weird things happen with Kharadjai and magic and b) Sophie can do some truly amazing fucked up unique shit. So I think she sort of interrupted the flow of the spell - the way she did with Ron and Wingardium Leviosa - and also altered it, or ended it (the way she did when she interrupted the connection between Ron's wand and the silver plate or goblet). That's my theory, anyway. She didn't take Bill's hand, which reinforces my belief that that is the reason.
I would really love it if you were to acknowledge my theory was correct (if it is) by just giving me a shoutout in the next chapter? Or by saying that someone got it right (if you don't want to reveal the answer to anyone else curious enough to go through the reviews) and then acknowledging it in the chapter you do reveal the answer in. I'm a strong proponent of my theory :P
Lastly, Scott's plan sounds audaciously Ocean's 11. Can't wait to see all the ways it goes wrong and how they dig themselves out of the hole they'll find themselves in.
~ Actually, Scott's My Favourite Character Now (Sorry, Ginny) [shortened for the name field because it wouldn't fit]
| Nifty Niffler chapter 32 . 8/24/2015
I would love to be able to brag about knowing why Remus didn't change, but alas, I can't. The obvious, and most likely erroneous answer, would be that Scott automatically did something to block Remus' lycanthropy, like he had blocked Harry's connection to Voldy. In all honesty, I don't remember much else happening. Maybe I should go back and read the previous few chapters. The question is, is it permanent? I hope it is. Remus deserves it.
As for the Polyjuice Potions, I certainly hope those hair containers are labeled as male/female. That could be quite the revelation for someone if they were to switch genders.
Looking forward to the next chapter, whenever it will be. Oh, and welcome to SIYE. That's a great group over there.
| Guest chapter 32 . 8/24/2015
Yami Umi here, can't login in this pc. Anyway, just wanted to say sorry for not reviewing the last chapter, though I obviously know it's not an obbligation per see, but it's probably widely appreciated, and I didn't do it. So, yeah, sorry.
To be completely honest, I thought this chapter was the perfect blend: plot-continous, smooth sailing, alternating POV constantly and keeping it dynamic. I know it's highly probably that you can't do this all the time, mainly because you depend on the story line and the plot to include Luna, sophie and Tonks, for example, but it's still a nice touch once in a while.
And about the writer's block, here's a tip for you: you can't force it. Take it from someone who at least have an idea. You can't get carried away with it either, but if you write something with no inspiration it's going to come out as clynical, with several missing details and rough edges. My best bet? Read one of the books for pleasure, even if it's just once in a while, to get yourself in it again, and do whatever you did to come with the inspiration for the kharadjai.
After all, you can't exactly force inspiration, but you can give it a little push now and then.
Very good chapter, excellent even, and good luck!
| IHateSnakes chapter 32 . 8/23/2015
Excellent! (As always, just...more so this time.)
So RR didn't change because...let me think.
He's sharing Tonks' saliva?
Someone spiked the Wolfsbane potion?
He misread the star charts and is off by one day?
Greyback is dead and his link to werewolfism died with him?
Can't wait for the next chapter.
| TimeShifter chapter 32 . 8/23/2015
I particularly enjoyed Ginny this chapter. It felt like she's staying to come into her own and, as you mentioned in our PMs a few chapters back, find her own ways to contribute. Lila's idea was interesting too. It's the subtle ideas like that which make me smile while I'm reading. Neville being able to defend himself and Luna sneaking up was another such moment.
As to Remus' current lack of transformation, I worry that it's because he somehow transferred it to his unborn son, but I'm guessing/hoping that's not actually how it works or they would know it from other past examples. He can't be the first werewolf with a lover. I'm excited to see how lack of lycanthropy will change him. Hopeful Harry will get a less sad substitute father figure and Tonks will get to spend more time with the fun-loving side of her husband!
| Holly chapter 18 . 7/27/2015
I have to admit, I've started and stopped this story several times, but it's so pleasant to see a story that keeps updating, I decided to give it another try. I'm not a huge fan of OCs, so I was a little put off before. I love your writing style, and your main OC has made me laugh. I like the dialog and the sparring between Harry and Ron. I always appreciate an author who can get them right.
This chapter threw me, however. I thought the fight between Harry and Scott was intense and biting. I held my breath reading it, but it was really, really good. Where I lost my breath, however, was when Hermione and Ginny decided to team up behind Harry's back deciding what was good for him. That was more like a punch in the gut. For me, it was no different to what DD always did to him, yet coming from them, it seemed like such a betrayal. Perhaps its because I know how canon ends and that the connection did prove helpful. I have no idea if you're going that way here, but I found this crushing. Hermione always thinks she knows better than Harry, sometimes she does, and sometimes she doesn't, but Ginny...Ginny siding with Hermione rather than letting Harry making his own decision about what happens to his head...it just felt very wrong to me.
I will be back, and I promise a detailed review once I catch up, but I need a little break now. I sort of hope Harry says "screw you all" and ditches them for a while. This is probably bothering me far more than it should, and as I continue, hopefully it will work itself out, but for now, I can't help feeling Harry would be incredibly betrayed.
| Opaque-Cavalier chapter 31 . 7/22/2015
As usual, another excellent chapter. I have to admit as Scott's Gringgotts heist plan was being explained I had visions from the bank robbery movie "Heat." However, as I think about it I don't think Scott and Lila, even with their training, abilities and lots and lots of guns could hold Gringotts against a full wizarding and goblin counterattack. They've always wreaked havoc, but they've had the advantage of surprise, mobility, different weapons, etc. In this case all their advantages will be negated. They'll win the first couple of engagements, but unless they slaughter wizards and goblins but the truckload early and shocking them into retreating they'll end up surrounded, with limited mobility and ammo and no real way to escape. I'm sure you've already plotted out a way they'll solve this and can't wait to read it.
| Tiffanyyylin chapter 31 . 7/19/2015
I like the style of this story. I'd rather have a few, genuinely written funny moments than a bunch of try-hard jokes shoehorned in.
Your writing has evolved :D No shame in that when you're giving out quality work.
Did Harry still disarm Draco who disarmed Dumbledore? Will they find out Harry's the owner? Or is someone else?
| Nifty Niffler chapter 31 . 7/19/2015
I can't wait for the aha moment when Hermione realizes they actually have another Hallow, the Cloak.
| Yami Umi chapter 30 . 6/21/2015
The reason I did not review e last chapter is somewhat the same reason i didn't do e same for the previous one: I didn't have the frigging time to sort my thoughts on the matter and write a somewhat lenghty and appropriate review. I hate to draw short ones, but I eo on occasion.
By the way, I didn't purposefully not write a chapter review because it was a Tonks chapter; I don't think that's quite the reason you got less review then, or maybe bot specifically Tonks, as a character, because honestly, I DO enjoy her train of thought and action.
The reason you got less reviews for that was probably because you deviated from the syory to make a side chapter, not involving directly the plot advancement and the present crisis, even if your intention for it wax noble and clear: to give an outsider the insight on Lila's behaviour and act, as well as her interaction with other members of the OotP.
While the readers get that, they probably can't help be a little disappointed, because while it may be an important chapter for future reference, it's still s break from the thickening plotline, and readers don't quite appreciate that.
Returning to this chapter, I thought Harry's dilemna was to be somewhat more dramatic, though I don't really know why I was expecting that; as this story is overall more rational than others, and Scott's influence on the non-dramatic analysis for the group is a heavy factor on the overall acceptance of the situation.
Besides thzt, nothing much to add, except to say that I DO rnjoy kharadjai menyions of their daily lives, and those glimpses on their society ans system. Maybe someday, we'll see the characters interacting with Scott's worls, though how you would accomplish that without completely losing the plotline, I hav absolutely no idea...
| HP18 chapter 30 . 6/20/2015
You're right the simplest titles are the best. I really like the way Ron,Hermione and Ginny reacted. And I really love how you're exploring Harry and Ginny's relationship. Like how Harry realizes how easily he can sleep if Ginny is there.