Reviews for The Betrayed Champion
Castellan Zheng chapter 1 . 7/21
It’s been years since I last read this story and it’s still the best Ash-betrayed fiction in my opinion.

I don’t know if you’ve finished editing the chapters or not but when you have I will definitely give this another read.

Unrelated side note I only recently discovered that Gerbilftw deleted his account which is a massive shame. I think the two of you did darker Ash better than anybody.
Guest chapter 36 . 4/9
Good novel but that kiss with dawn is not a good idea as per ash nature he is not a pervert who just kiss his friends but good idea and good execution
zanzara chapter 1 . 3/20
Also, as another suggestion about some other possible story, i was thinking in a Spin-off story of "The Betrayed Champion", specifically, about a What if one of the characters used the power of Celebi to time travels and prevented the fateful moment in that Ash was betrayed, specifically i am talking about May.

I mean, perhaps this Spin-off will takes place after the incident of Kalos, when Ash was confronted by one of his former victims and he leaves Kalos for this, leaving Paul and May alone. And maybe during the time in that Ash was meditating in his home, May was very sad and depressed by the situation of Ash, lamenting that all this started because the actions of Drew and his schemes that leads to ruined Ash's life, making that she wishes finds a way to makes that the things can be like before. And suddenly, she get a call from Kurt, the pokeball maker, and he tells her that he finally managed to unlocks the GS pokeball, and ask her to comes his place. (note: during the years in that Ash faked his death, May became acquantice from Kurt during some journey in Johto, making that she become interested in the GS pokeball, as this was the previous duty of Ash)

And once that she came to Kurt workshop, she finally opens this pokeball and release Celebi, whom will be notably grateful for be free again, and as result, Celebi want to rewards May for this, and as result of her previous concerns about Ash, May asks Celebi to sends her conscious to her past self, specifically the night in that Ash was betrayed 3 years ago, allowing May traveled in the time, at least her mind. And as result of this, May will be prepared to undo the plans of Drew, like that during some conversation with her friends during the night, May excuses her to go outside for some reason, and she will go to spies Paul, Ash and Drew, and takes notes of the actions of Drew to knocked out Paul with his Roserade, making that May can uses this event like that she was a key witness from the actions of Drew, and she convinces everybody to gives Ash the benefit of doubt, and interrogates rigorously Drew, to forces him to say the truth, allowing to May to clear the name of Ash, even before to that Ash finally return to the Pokemon center, making that this time, Ash only be confronted by his friends to tell him about the actions of Drew, leaving Ash simply disappointed from him, and Drew leaves the scene crying.

And as result of this outcome, Cynthia will apologize Ash for be thinking that he stole her pokemon, and they simply will be preparing for their match in the next day, allowing Ash to challenges Cynthia for her title, and perhaps he manages to defeats her, allowing him become the new Sinnoh Champion, and as result of his position, he could be invited to the Champion league, to get the chance to challenges the other Champions, including Leon, all this thanks to the intervention of May.

And the reason to think that this possible story should be a Spin-off than canon, is because to be honest, i doubt that Ash accepts to uses the powers of Celebi to return to the past and undo some events to tries retrieves his original life, as even if this was very tempting for Ash, he could think that makes this will be like to be escaping from his problems again, than faces them and deals with the consequences, making that Ash think that tries to do this could be like a coward action. Without count, that Ash also could considers that if he undo the past, he could forgot some important yet harsh life lessons that he learnt, particulary about all the consequences of his actions for worked with Team Rocket, the show more value for his friends, and even learns the truth about his brother Red, without count that if he undo the past, the Team Rocket will return again, making that Ash think that won't be a good idea to travels to the past, and he will think in simply still lives the path that he created as result of his own actions, and accepts his life, than tries to be changing it.

Sorry by sent a lot ideas for other possible stories, but after read "The Betrayed Champion", i was thinking that could be interesting to see other stories related with this fic, like a Sequel, and/or a Spin-off.
zanzara chapter 36 . 2/18
If you are considering write a sequel of "The Betrayed Champion", i was thinking in an interesting idea, what if the main antagonist of this sequel is the Hunter J.

I says this, because if you analyzes it in retrospective, Hunter J was actually the indirect responsible from the events of "The Betrayed Champion", as she was whom killed Delia, and framed Red as the murderer, leading that he ended like a fugitive, and that Ash ended harboring a misplaced grudge in his older brother. And as result of this, Red ended becoming a mercenary, as to be a criminal, he couldn't has a normal life anymore, bringing as result that Drew could hired him to his plan of frame Ash from sabotaged Cynthia before their match, leading that his own friends turned their back to him, and pushed Ash to the life as Team Rocket member, leading Ash to become Alpha, and ended staining his reputation with his criminal record, leading to the current events of this epilogue, in that Ash will be tormented the rest of his life by his crimes, and be critized by his victims for ruined their lives, causing that Ash even ended considering become a Pokemon Ranger, than be still a Pokemon Trainer.

And if Ash become a Ranger, this could certainly leads him to faces notables criminals, among them, the Hunter J, whom maybe could reappears alive after the events of the battle in the Lake Valor, when her airship was sunk into the lake, and she was apparently killed in action. But perhaps she managed to escaped alive, and now she could plans a revenge in Ash for ruined her previous businness. Adding that Ash could also set score in the person resposnible for brought misery and grief to his family during years. And even, to considers that Hunter J also steals pokemon from trainers, the fact that Ash defeats her and stops her, could be like a penance for his crimes, as now he will be defending the people and pokemon from criminals like J, or Alpha, allowing Ash to uses his new career to makes a service to the society and makes proper ammends for his crimes, to restore eventually his public image, and help to overcome his past and inner demons with the time.
Guest chapter 36 . 2/1
To be honest, i think that the current situation of Ash is ironic, in the sense that he was falsely accused by a crime that he didn't commited in the beginning of the story; stole Cynthia's pokemon out of sabotage. But now, he is truly culprit from far worse crimes; theft of pokemon, assasination and conspiration behalf the Team Rocket, during years.

And even if Ash was pardoned by the authorities, and his friends don't keep him accountable by feels themselves culprits from this situation, sadly, his current situation implies that his career as pokemon trainer will be stained by this controversy, about his crimes as Team Rocket member, to the point that Ash cancelled his journey to Kalos abruptly by be confronted for one of his victims, leaving clear that he will be never accepted in good terms by the public as champion or master pokemon.

Even, to considers this outcome, i guess that Ash will forget definitely the offer of Cynthia about a pokemon battle for her title, as Ash could think that as result of his criminal past, this battle could brings a very negative backlash behalf of public, for gives too much privilegy to a former criminal, to the point that if Ash wins this battle, this could even leads to an outrage and a riot, as many people could despises that someone like Ash could get the champion title so easy. Adding that maybe Ash could considers rejects this offer out of respect to Cynthia, as she could ends dragged in this negative backlash as well, for be pampering a former criminal, risking her own reputation in the process.

To be honest, this story proves that every decision that you takes in the life, good and bad, will always have some consequence.
DullMobbins chapter 1 . 1/24
Wild to see this updated, even more wild that I didn’t see the notification until now. Great epilogue!
Jsi34Joey34 chapter 36 . 1/23
wow i am surprised it got updated and seeing all the changes and the epilogue made this story a lot better so glad it finally was ended though i might have been remembering wrong but i didn't see the 4th wall breaking stuff ash in it now so if it was removed that does suck but it still was chanaged better for the better so good job with this story and 8/10 only issue was how ash was not punished for his actions but i get why you didn't chanage that because it have to be a rewrite of the story and i hope you do make a sequel
WhiteEagle1985 chapter 36 . 1/22
A great way to end this story!
Ruthlesssceptile6 chapter 36 . 1/18
Man! This was an awesome epilogue, this fanfic is probably one of the best Advanceshipping fanfics out there, and I would really really love a sequel to it, great to see you're back, you're really one of those guys who can fill the gap left after Gerbilftw deleted all his stories... Nevertheless, an absolute shocker to see this after so much time lol, it was crazy to update this after 8 yrs, but sometimes craziness is the best thing one comes accross lol, and this was one of those cases, Great job!
G chapter 36 . 1/16
Good epilogue, is cool to see Ash taking account of his actions back to be affiliated with Team Rocket, because it was a little illogical, and even cynical, that Ash wasn't concerned nor remorsed for his crimes and cruel actions when he was working for Team Rocket.

I mean, maybe he was indifferent when he was overwhelmed by the Alpha persona, but now that Ash himself returned, he should takes in account all his crimes against innocent people and pokemon, making logical and even interesting to see Ash starting to faces his past actions.

Like in this epilgoue, in that during his journey in Kalos, he was confronted by a girl, that lost her brother, because he commited suicide as result of that Ash stole his pokemon, showing to him that his crimes had notable consequences for many people, and even if he had a happy ending, many of his victims didn't.

Seriously, to considers his crimes, i won't be surprised that Ash ended getting many enemies, making that now this implies some kind of butterfly effects for his journey, in the sense that many people could hates him for worked by Team Rocket, and even this could creates notable distrust toward him, making that now Ash has to faces this ordeal in his life, forever.

Yet, was also cute to see the interactions between Ash and May in this epilogue, as they could talks about their past mistakes, and the current outcomes as result of this. Adding that was interesting to see May encouraging Ash to become a Pokemon Ranger.

Well, maybe to considers his criminal past, could be a better idea that he considers become a Pokemon Ranger than a Pokemon Master, because to consider the incident in Kalos, this certainly implied that Ash will never be accepted in good terms like a Regional Champion, as many people could hates him for his crimes, to the point that even his criminal past could brings negative controversies for his career as Pokemon trainer, making that his previous dream as Pokemon Master, won't be factible anymore.

But on the other hand, Ash could be more accepted like a Pokemon Ranger, as even his skills could be useful for this job, adding that to work with this justice forces, Ash could regains more the trust of the people, than being a Pokemon trainer.

Well, i really liked this epilogue, keep up the good job :)
Cyberbeasttitan chapter 36 . 1/16
Honestly, I've forgotten what this story was even about... It's been awhile since I've read an advance shipping story, you don't see many around these days.
Red-Umbreon40 chapter 36 . 1/14
Do iiiiittt. Write a sequel!
Gamelover41592 chapter 36 . 1/14
great epilogue to a great fic, also if you do a sequel let me know when it's up :)
KarmaBlade8 chapter 31 . 12/18/2022
Wait that was actually one of the best plot twists I’ve read on here :0
zanzara chapter 1 . 11/2/2022
To adds two cents to some discussions about the possible new outcomes for the story, regarding to Ash's final fate, i would likes to imagines that if his former affiliation to the Team Rocket ends acknowledge by the world, including all his crimes, perhaps the public could demands that Ash get his liscence revoked and be banned from be a pokemon trainer forever.

And as result of this notable public pressure, the Pokemon league could be forced to considers their demands, and throw Ash under the bus, even if they dislikes this, because maybe after the mess with the framing of Drew years ago, the Pokemon league ended ashamed from ruined the chance of a promising trainer like Ash, and they wanted to have the chance to finds him and gives Ash some benefits, like his promised battle against Cynthia, to fights for her title of Champion, as way to makes ammends. But sadly, as result of his former affiliation with the Team Rocket, now the public is demanding that Ash be forbidden to be still a pokemon trainer, spoiling any plan that the Pokemon league had to makes ammends with Ash.

Nevertheless, maybe before of that the Pokemon league makes official his banning, Cynthia could intervenes, and she uses her influence, popularity and some favors, to prevent that Ash be banned from be still a Pokemon trainer, as Cynthia thinks that she owes this to Ash, for put him in this situation to denied him a formal investigation when Drew framed him, making that she wishes to makes some kind of penance for Ash. And after some heated and difficult discussions and arguments, Cynthia will manages avoid that Ash loses his Pokemon trainer liscence, but with the price that the Pokemon league will be forced to makes null all his previous feats within the Pokemon league circuits instead, since the Indigo league circuit, to the Sinnoh league circuit, including also the Orange league and the Kanto Battle frontier, leaving Ash like a beginner trainer again, at least in standards of lacks medals and trophies, as those became nulled by the Pokemon league, to avoid some notable negative backlash of the public.

And even the promised battle between Ash and Cynthia, will be cancelled by the Pokemon league, to appease the public, as the people could become outraged if Ash was given the chance of become a Pokemon Champion, after be exposed that he was affiliated with Team Rocket, making that Ash and Cynthia must to forget about this battle, much to their chagrin, as Ash will needs has a fresh start since the beginning again, to regains the trust in the public eventually, and avoid some backlashes in the process.
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