|Reviews for The Wizard's World: YR 1|
| Kidagirl8 chapter 24 . 7/11
#6 is not unposted now and it is by far my favorite of your works!
| Safire Ranmako chapter 3 . 6/6
Did you forget that at this point Harry actually has three eevees. He's missing Umbreon, Sylvion, and Espion. You said here, and in the last chapter, that he only has two Eevees, not three.
| Rikudou no Shinju chapter 17 . 3/5
... As odd as it may seem, I am shipping HarryxLucy SO hard right now. What I have read so far in this fic is awesome!
| DarthRexPoke44 chapter 5 . 2/3
Merde isn't really a curse word, it just seems means "shit". It's normally said with mild humorously.
| DarthRexPoke44 chapter 4 . 1/24
Question, in what school would economics and art be considered a basic class? From what I know through college, only, math, science, language arts (english for those english speaking countries), and social studies (which is mostly history). Economics is more iffy, cause some schools require to tame a semester long class for the basics.
| KitkatMoon chapter 24 . 1/19
Love your story
| Guest chapter 1 . 10/10/2015
I like it, you put good thought into your theme.
| Kikuriki chapter 3 . 9/19/2015
I imagine several of the face lickers were probably disgusted with the left over taste of potions that had been there, lol
| Guest chapter 19 . 9/5/2015
May just be my interpretation but this chapter seemed much more realistic as far as likely interaction between Ash, the Flamels and Harry. It was extremely well done and completely believable.
| Guest chapter 18 . 9/5/2015
What doesn't seem realistic is that all the Flamels would have had to done is explain to Ash that a wizard was blocking them and information about what happened to their family. That doesn't seem that hard to explain and for Ash to tell Harry. I don't think the meeting was realistic at all mainly because it seems so contrived. Harry should have enough understanding of magic by this point to at least be willing to listen.
| Guest chapter 9 . 9/5/2015
Anything related to diabetes cannot be caused by a diet with too little food or no sugar. That's absurd. It's the exact opposite. A diet with too much food or too much sugar can cause diabetes or related problems. The only people in the Dursley household who should worry are Vernon and Dudley. Harry is the last person who would develop anything at all similar to it because of his diet.
| Guest chapter 24 . 9/3/2015
excellent story as always
| Brooklyn Daughter of Artemis chapter 1 . 8/29/2015
Moaning myrtle's last name is Warren. No offense meant by this comment...
| Guest chapter 14 . 6/3/2015
I loved the first part of this series. I love the realistic way you dealt with Harry's past issues. I loved Ash and how they both became a family. I loved the way they entered into the Wizarding World. (Hilarious, that was)
You're a good writer and there's something about your writing that keeps me wanting to read.
However, there are a few issues that are making this second part in the series hard for me to continue, even though I'm greatly invested in your story.
I realize that you warned of some slight bashing. I figured it wouldnt be a big deal. The problem with 'bashing' is it tends to flatten characters. What were three dimensional characters are now flat and uninteresting antagonists. And extremely grating on the nerves. The bashing was far more intense than you indicated.
Why is it that EVERY single person at Hogwarts, except an extreme few, is either a jerk, a bully, or an idiot? Are there no good people anymore? It's extremely unrealistic. Yes, children can be cruel. But certainly not all of them. All of the teachers are idiots, too. Why are Harry and Ash the only smart, good people around?
I know you said there are reasons for certain things, but as a writer, it is your duty to make extremes believable. Readers can and will believe anything, so long as there is reason to it in the written word.
Characters are more important than description. You have a lovely way with describing the surroundings, but in the end, I rather the effort be put into putting depth into the other characters. One or two extreme characters, you can generally get away with - like Dumbledore being so villainous. But Ron needs a reason for being his bullying self. As does Percy, Fred, and George. No one is truly horrible all the time. They're children, for crying out loud. Hermione is intelligent. I wish she was given more credit or better justification for her awful personality.
And since when does Hagrid threaten to box someone's ears? Especially when its obviously a distraught parent.
Now, I also realize that Dumbledore probably hexed everyone, but still I just wish the characters were more real. I love this story. I've been enjoying it so much. I haven't put it down all day. It had such amazing potential. I hope you can take these comments into consideration as you write future stories. You are a fantastic story teller.
| Guest chapter 18 . 5/14/2015
you are a horrible auther and should quit