|Reviews for Tony's New Family|
| Guest chapter 3 . 1/2/2014
sounds like the author is even younger than the Mary Sue OC. gods!
| Guest chapter 6 . 2/25/2013
Tony fines his picture on Facebook under the name of Tony Denordo. He has only one friend, Tadpole. message "HELP ME" dated yesterday. tony's reply, I'm coming. I'm a romantic. this could be a two part series.
| DawnoftheNutter chapter 3 . 11/13/2011
...to be honest, I am finding some inconsistencies in your writing, along with difficult dialogue. 17 year old kids should not sound like they have a 30 year old maturity-trust me on this one. In dialogue, don't be afraid to add slang, they are people talking to one another, would you say things like the way you write them? I'm not trying to be mean, I only comment to construct. I hope you realize that.
| Imagine The Dreamers chapter 8 . 10/27/2011
CONTINUE VERY SOON! :D
| zats chapter 8 . 10/27/2011
For one who is still reading, please re inspire yourself. The story just a little longer chapters. More please.
| DS2010 chapter 7 . 10/17/2011
oh man tony is a real trouble magnet. Glad he was found by the marines. Looking forward to more.
| pillendreher84 chapter 7 . 10/16/2011
Hello. First excuse my English, it is not good.
So I had to register only once as you unfortunately do not allow anonymous reviews. A friend tells me how to do it, I contacted them sooner, just never knew how.
Now for your story. It is really interesting. A good topic. Too bad that some areas do not you describe in more detail. Environments, such as conversations in the past in the search for Tony, Tony's struggle, his fear would be able to describe accurately and it would be even more exciting. So everything is just scratched, like a short description. It's not bad, but not like a great story, where I say wow when reading.
Still, I liked reading this story, think you have great ideas. Maybe you're the next chapter not as big jumps. As an example, I have a story in German. Tony is also kidnapped, injured, but it has already 47 chapters since it is all described in more detail.
So much fun to write. As an example, you can take these stories: s/6358343/1/Where_the_Teddybears_Have_Their_Picnic, s/5893602/1/bRag_b_bDoll_b,
These two might help to understand what I mean. But please review the criticism is not to be too negative but as an aid. One can only improve and you've got super start, it just lacks just a little refinement.
So hope you write soon.I wish you even more reviews for you. Love pillendreher
| DS2010 chapter 5 . 9/18/2011
captured would be interesting, there is always someone after him. maybe leave some clues where he was supposed to be.
| zats chapter 5 . 9/18/2011
Tony angst makes the story better, but I can't stand to see him hurt too bad. Look forward to the next chapter!
| zats chapter 4 . 9/16/2011
Good story so far, Tony can be abrasive sometimes. Hope those two can make up. Look forward to reading more.
| carraighncis chapter 2 . 9/12/2011
Hi, just read your story .. enjoyed it and looking forward to next update! ... the storyline is great and leaves tons of room for even more plots! imagine Tony being the responsible one ... should be fun ... Keep em coming and Thanks ..