|Reviews for Original Sin|
| Aretee chapter 29 . 12/29/2013
Umm...I just read your whole story in a 24 hours and now that my family is mad at me for woefully neglecting them, I have to go do damage control. ;)
I loved this story. It was intensely personal for me and made me consider things about my own life and the people in it. Thank you. I think you may have helped me be more patient with a few people.
| winterhorses chapter 29 . 12/10/2013
This is a captivating, well-written story, and I LOVE the interaction between Edward and, well, everyone. :) Thank you for sharing your talent with us!
| sexysiren1981 chapter 29 . 10/20/2013
That was a truly fuck awesome story - well done! Loved every moment :)
| Daphodill chapter 29 . 10/5/2013
Really great story! I read most of it with a smile on my face. Although Carlisle is deeply damaged, much of it a self-inflicted sort if purgatory, he was brilliant and charming, and very nearly perfect. I didn't even mind the BPOV so much. This was an excellently plotted fic, and not at all what I expected.
The supporting cast of characters did so much to help in the MCs' growth. I swore Jake would be gay with how flamboyantly comfortable he was with Bella, yet never tried to get with her (I was going to say sleep with her, but he did that - they were constantly in bed together), their relationship was so much fun. Adding Rosalie to their group was great, although I did feel bad that she was hung up on Bella. I hope she found happiness.
Edward...Edward's arrival was a bit of a surprise to me. I'm not exactly sure what I expected Carlisle to have locked away in that room, but I certainly wasn't expecting him to have erased himself from his kid's life. Edward's behavior was funny and disturbing. I genuinely felt bad for the guy. But then he provided all the laughs. My heart swelled as their relationship grew and blananced out. That epi...I don't get choked up much when reading fic, but that whole thing at the hospital. Lord have mercy...my feels. Don't get me started on Charlie-i adore that guy. I can't help but be happy for them. His revelation makes Jake and Bella's familiarity all the more clear.
I want to know how Rachel and Paul turned out. That was a very sweet diversion.
This one is going in my 'must read again and share' list. Truly excellent work. Thanks for sharing.
| Guest chapter 13 . 9/23/2013
I love this. Your characters are so complex, I'm just sad that I didn't find this sooner.
| TishPhoenix chapter 29 . 8/4/2013
Phenomenal story line and twists. I love how you placed each character in the saga in here. Very original. I'm truly sad to have to stop reading this lol .
The way you brought in each character into the role you have made for them, and keeping them true to who they are but different is amazing. Maybe I'm reading too much into it. But you don't see this often in Ff.
Rosalie, her beauty and sexuality is fierce. She's protective but she's also gentle when it comes to loving. Her crush on bella shows this when arguing with Bella over who exactly Carlisle is in this fic.
Jasper, I'm a huge fan of Jasper based fictions. It's not usual that I find a story he's involved so little in. But the fact that you made him skilled in certain aspects was a nice touch. He might have had that dark side, able to get information at a whim. But he was quick to tell them that looks could be deceiving. He went from rogue to rogue with a heart in .2 seconds. I would to see how else you are able to write his character in other stories, even him more centrally focused.
Emmett and Alice, Emmett got a little light. He was a little dismissive but had a sense of genuine goodness and warmth here. Alice was as always alice. The button comment from Edward was priceless... Asking bella for advice and having it challenged by edward. Reminds me of the issues with Chess in the Saga. The connection. It was subtle but beautifully done.
Edward, well he was a pain in the butt. To bella at least. I found myself laughing with Edward's character here and little as well as getting frustrated at him just like bella would. It was this fact that got me into him. (not a big fan of Edwards though, so this says something) Edward was able to get into the characters heads. Pull on something within them, who they were. Are and wanted to be. It annoyed them, settled them and made they laugh. Essentially, Edwards always been able to get into someones head and do this and the way you spun that giving that depth. Him depth was brilliant.
Bella, She's still that undeniably un biased being. She has a lot to give and gives it fully. Her reactions to things were a little more realistic in this than what I can say for some aspects of the saga. She was truly human here and beautiful in her ups and downs.
Renee, Charlie and Billy were also brilliantly written. The twist with Billy and Charlie was not seen and I think I laughed nervously with Bella but It was still sweet. Charlie grumbles and in a way he's in tune with those he loves just as bella is. Renee is not one to quickly judge and is more a friend to bella than a mother, I love the family dynamic and how you built on this even with them only coming into place briefly. Adding in Sue and billy made the family whole, but in a whole new way. Even Jacob was worked into this warmly. There was nudity where he was concerned and even rough playfulness. Even brooding over his friendship with Bella but in the end he became the brother Bella always saw him as.
And finally Carlisle. He always had family, especially daddy issues. But here Daddy was the farthest from a saint. The development of his character was tragically beautiful as the story went on. Sad but hopeful. Compassionate yet fierce. It was brilliant. there are no words.
The fact that you were able to do something so non canon and yet still preserve some of the strongest character point to the characters we love in the saga is is a talent few including myself have. You took so many wonderful things to new light and I was hanging on to the edge as I read. Wanting to laugh and cry as I read for the characters. Suspense and beauty tangled gracefully in this fic too. Great job on it. Truly.
| Jasper-replaces-edward chapter 29 . 8/4/2013
it's a wonder they ever got things sorted. loved it. xx
| Jasper-replaces-edward chapter 28 . 8/4/2013
ooh eer, Berty and Carlisle, no not for me. xx
| Jasper-replaces-edward chapter 27 . 8/4/2013
| Jasper-replaces-edward chapter 25 . 8/4/2013
Wow, that was a good chapter. Hmm Billy and Charlie, what a fab idea. xx
| Jasper-replaces-edward chapter 24 . 8/4/2013
Yup definitely a good thing. xx
| Jasper-replaces-edward chapter 22 . 8/4/2013
Time out time out time out is what he needs. xx
| Jasper-replaces-edward chapter 21 . 8/4/2013
Well you really cannot blame Edward, he is just pushing to see where the limits are. xx
| Jasper-replaces-edward chapter 20 . 8/4/2013
Wow, Carlisle has been incredibly hard on himself hasn't he. xx
| Jasper-replaces-edward chapter 19 . 8/4/2013
Phew I had a horrible thought you were going to bring Carlisle in there at the end to really round things up! xx