|Reviews for Blood Stained Sand|
| Brain Freak chapter 1 . 4/26
Normally I don't write up replies or notices in reviews (I find it so cringey) but I just wanted to say that this won't be continued. Sorry guys. I've lost interest in it ages ago and I'm no longer active on this site. I would've posted an author's note for this but, from what I recall, was incredibly strict on just posting a note without having any sort of proper chapter. So this will do.
I'd just like to thank everyone who read this and were kind enough to leave a review. Kazza, thank you for your criticisms. I totally agree with you, and thank you for taking the time to leave them. I just got the notification this morning and decided to give a quick pop in. I wrote this about... *raspberry noises* 6 years ago? My writing back then was just so cringey. You're 100% right. Thankfully my writing has improved vastly since then, imo. But I still appreciate it!
Thanks everyone. Have a good one!
| Kazza chapter 20 . 4/25
At the beginning it was interesting and promising. Niamh was different from the usual OCs. But then her character became kinda wooden. Sure she goes through shit, poor her. But you sometimes she acts strangely for her surroundings and situation that it throws things off.
Alison comes in as a sort of contrast or foil for Niamh but you make their interactions a bit forced and one-sided. We get that Ali was a bitch and Niamh won't take her shit but Ali submits too quickly. Like you just set up their dialogue for Niamh to easily win and boost Niamh's character. That would be fine if it were written a little more believably. Show breaks in their fronts of toughness (I know Ali's dead but for future reference) show their fear of the unknown, show their humanity even if it reveals flaws. Ali's just a bitch. That's it. Niamh is this unpolished gem. Eh. Flat and wooden characters. Well I'll give Niamh some props and raise her to Pinicchio status. She's still not a "real boy(girl)" though.
Also, why do they initially keep her? She's just a burden. The family has to give up some comforts to keep her there and keep her safe. It creates strain in the family. That would be an interesting dynamic except it doesn't really make sense. How would Moon and Ruby know they would even like her? They have to make an effort to make her less uncomfortable. Like giving her human food and keeping Lizard the Rapey Reptile from pawing at her. Why? They give up more than they get from her. She doesn't even help until Lizard puts her to work.
The other mutants treat her real nice despite not really having a reason to. Either they were actually told why she was kept (then they know more than the audience lol) or they were given orders. But even then why wouldn't they question it? Giving up some liberties to keep an unwilling mooch? I'd gripe about that.
Eh, good luck hope things go better
| XxRemus John LupinxX chapter 20 . 3/20/2016
Please please write more.
| Guest chapter 20 . 8/20/2014
This is a good story! Please write soon!
| Clockwork Art chapter 20 . 8/19/2014
I think you should do at least 3 or 4 chapters, you have my support (:
| HermioneandMarcus chapter 20 . 7/4/2014
excellent chapter update and i can not wait to read more soon please and thank you
| FloodFeSTeR chapter 19 . 9/7/2013
OMG YOU MUST UPDATE SOON!
| FloodFeSTeR chapter 2 . 9/6/2013
This is an excellent story already, exceptional with details and the mutants mannerisms. Keep it up
| ItsHarleyBitch chapter 1 . 9/6/2013
I. Love. Her. Name. I would like permission to use it in a story of mine if that's ok?
| Ferretsong chapter 19 . 8/13/2013
This is a good story, was hesitant to read it, but it's good. I hope you update before Halloween, :).
A logged out writer,
| xCANxUxHEARxMExDEARx chapter 18 . 6/12/2013
Just found your story this morning and have been reading it nonstop ever since! I freaking love it! Please update soon? I can see that you haven't been on in months but I'm going to follow/favorite you in hopes that you do. Please come back and update very soon! 3
| Guest chapter 18 . 1/18/2013
Plz update :)
| Dance Elle Dance chapter 18 . 12/19/2012
Yay! Super excited to see that you'd updated. I love what you did here. You have a way of writing that just grabs me and pulls me into your story. I am very eager to read what happened! What a cliffhanger! :D
| cutterjohns chapter 18 . 12/16/2012
Nice update! I've missed this story. It's nice to see Niamh slowly but surely adjusting to her life in the hills, and that she and Lizard are being at least somewhat civil towards each other. Really excited to see that relationship develop, and Lizard's character itself.
Oh, man. Poor Alison. Don't get me wrong, she was a whiny pain, but no one deserves what she's about to go through. Any chance they'll save her? Will she even *want* to live after that anyway?
Gunfire! Wonder what's up with that. Very excited that we've reached a turning point in the plot! The pacing in this story has been wonderful - not too slow, but far from rushed.
I hope you'll update this soon! There haven't been many active Lizard stories as of late and this is one of my favourites. :)
| bookwormxwriter chapter 18 . 12/14/2012