Reviews for Pain of Betrayal
Midnight Rose2598 chapter 19 . 4/22
can you email it to christinaann2598 Gmail .com
Midnight Rose2598 chapter 19 . 4/22
can you email it to christinaann2598
LittleMeowMoo chapter 21 . 1/7
Good but there is quite a few mistakes that could do with correcting, some words missing and such.

Other then that i enjoyed it ! :3
LittleMeowMoo chapter 4 . 1/7
You need to use descriptive words other then "the man" and "the boy" when referring to someone cos you tend to repeat it over and over and it gets pretty tedious.
Although not the best written story, i am interested to see how it goes.
Guest chapter 21 . 10/23/2016
You just got another. Fan cause this is great
paz chapter 20 . 10/4/2016
azalea-rose99 chapter 6 . 8/7/2016
aware not weir
Guest chapter 19 . 7/26/2016
Hi again, this is gabby20766, can you email it to: gabbyv5 hotmail. Com
Guest chapter 19 . 7/26/2016
Hi it's gabby20766 again... Grr... Fan fiction did not show my email up! I will write it with a bunch of spacing, just get rid of them!
Gabbyv5 hotmail . Com and if that did not work.
(at symbol) (period) c o m
Guest chapter 19 . 7/26/2016
Hi! My name is Gabby20766! And well I can no longer get into my account... Can you email me that chapter about Tom, Fenir, and Remus? It's
Thank you!
By the way I love this story, finally had some down time, from hanging out with friends, summer homework, chores, work, and color guard practice. Definitely my busiest summer.
katelaina17171 chapter 16 . 6/8/2016
A truly lovely fic just wish Harry did not forgive Hermione so easily, even in canon she stuck with Ron too much. plus as a muggleborne she should have told her parents or police the way he was abused. Not so loyal or clever in my books. can't wait to read more.;-)
KaityGrace21 chapter 21 . 5/9/2016
I absolutely love this story. Brilliant work. hope you do more stories soon. :D
marthapreston4 chapter 1 . 4/28/2016
This isnt boy/boy/boy which I wouldn't mind what it is 2 grown men with a young boy who is young enough to be thier son
Guest chapter 1 . 3/29/2016
On a grammatical note (On Harry's eleventh birthday he had received his letter for Hogwarts and things got even MORE WORSE at home.) More worse is not the correct grammar.
It should be
On Harry's eleventh birthday he had received his letter for Hogwarts and things got even worse at home. His uncle stopped using the belt replacing it with a whip.

I hope that people remember this as it is one of the most common grammatical errors.
Guest chapter 1 . 2/9/2016
Love the idea and certainly couldn't have written it better.
Having said that, maybe some day you'll look back over it and be able to see things you'd like to tweek. I know I was itching to correct a few niggles here and there that I would have hoped a beta would've picked up on. e.g. using the right there / their / they're, Hermione saying 'how dare that mad?' in chapter 18.
For my own personal taste, some of the language Harry uses is too formal. He might write that way, but I wouldn't expect him to talk that way. I fully realise that every character is OOC, but I would have liked his manner of speaking to stay roughly the same.
Personal taste again, I think a lot of what you've written could have been fleshed out more, or slowed down some other way. It was a lot of change extremely quickly.
Of course, this is personal preference, and it's not like I wasn't warned about the OCCness! :-)
Really good ideas. Good to see unusual pairings. Good to see you finish what you started.
I rarely leave reviews, but I've left this one in the hope you find it useful.
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