|Reviews for The Call|
| wtchcool chapter 15 . 2/19/2012
Medal? :) Well, I suppose I could settle for Pence...
Lol. Aw, Trip, that's almost as cute your baby sister, which your parents are not going to let you trade in for a dog.
And Peter is awesome and seems to somehow avoid even accomplice liability. *stares at him* Not that I'm complaining, mind you.
Heh. That'll teach the journalists to mess with the Flemings.
Poor Rollo. Did he know what he was getting into when he started dating Jamie?
*sighs* And of course, Peter has to pay penance in the form of losing his corporation. Oh well. Still preferable to prison, which is what I suppose he deserves, or death which Tarot apparently felt he deserved.
Yay for Vince becoming chief of police! Wait, why wasn't he quoted again for awhile? What did Scales do to him?
And the Jackals prove useful, even if they have questionable taste in leadership.
So if Scales can't have a daughter of his own, he at least has a pseudo- father/daughter relationship with Trip's sister. *shrugs* Just hope he isn't a bad influence on her...
Fifty years? Dang. Either Vince doesn't know when to retire, or (and I suspect this is what you meant) he did and Trip's taken up the mantle by that point. :)
*huggles the ending* Brilliant job! Way to go!
| NeuroticMusing chapter 15 . 2/18/2012
Awww! *grabs a box of tissues* It's finally over? :'(
I liked this chapter. Nice to see things wrap up so well. (Even Orwell with Rollo, I guess. *sighs*)
My favorite part of this chapter was about Scales' paternal relationship with Liz. *grins* Maybe you'll get some eventual Dales after all.
Overall, my favorite chapter was probably Scales. Dana's pregnant reactions to the already bad luck she had in that episode was just perfect.
I really liked this story, despite my feelings for Dana/Vince. Very well done!
| NeuroticMusing chapter 14 . 2/18/2012
Oh my gosh, it's almost the end! *is sad*
Vince better get his butt to the hospital asap! (Lovely touch with the drama of the case, by the way.)
Good work on this chapter. And thank you LM for helping out my sister! :)
Nice to see everything work out in the end! Let's hope all goes well with the epilogue.
| wtchcool chapter 14 . 2/17/2012
My god, even the Lich gets a relatively happy ending. (You know, compared to how he always seems to wind up in my fics...)
Ah. *Smacks forehead* Thought I was forgetting something. I was wondering why Dana's sensibilities have her blood boiling. Perhaps another word would have been more apt. *shrugs* Eh, not important.
Oh dear. No one seems to understand that you don't upset a pregnant Dana. But I suppose we are talking about a bunch of crazy people here...
*Gasps* Was he seriously suggesting burning Peter's hair off? *hugs Peter*
Philips can go, *coughs* Ahem. Well, suffice it to say that I'm just not going to feel sympathetic towards him, no matter how many attacks of conscience he has.
Er, hmm. Maybe that should've been "administered Miranda Rights warnings"... Right, my fault; should've spoken up sooner. Shutting up now.
:D You remembered! But then, I suppose it would be hard to forget a series of delays like that...
Lol. Poor Dana feeling bad about her strategy. It DID work, though and it's not like it was unethical or anything...
*Too excited about Dana going into labor to care that the score is Scales-1, ARK-0*
Overall, very good chapter. Heck, very good fic for that matter. I, too, shall be sad to see it end, though I expect as author your reaction will be more pronounced. *hands you box of Kleenex so you'll be ready*
| wtchcool chapter 13 . 2/5/2012
Um, because you decided to merge the two plotbunnies you had?
No, see, what I'm wondering about is why Scales wasn't the one to shoot Marty. *stares at you* Then again, you're the one who wrote this, and who is your favorite character again? *headdesks* *sighs* I suppose I'm one to talk when I like to conveniently forget who put Scales up to the murder...
Unnecessary departure from canon aside, I enjoyed the chapter. (My god, though, poor Marty. Even when you kept Scales from pulling the trigger, he still snuffs it?)
Ahem, didn't notice any quibbles, though, so good work. Curious to see what'll happen post-Endgame. :)
Heh, by out of it, Dana didn't mean batshit crazy as a result of the Lich's toxin did she? (Poor, poor Jamie...)
| NeuroticMusing chapter 13 . 2/5/2012
'Cause like two chapters is the best ever! :P Oh well, at least it's not the last chapter. :)
I really liked this chapter! Dana is a cranky pregnant lady, best not anger her.
Oh Vince, maybe you'll be able to feel her stomach at least once. If you beg nicely. Lol.
Curious as to how this last chapter will go before the epilogue! Looking forward to it!
| wtchcool chapter 12 . 1/27/2012
Yay; it's up! :)
Aw. Would Vince hold a grudge against Travis? I'm sure Travis isn't going to do it again.
*stares* Now I'm curious. How often does Vince go for a haircut?
Short chapter, but totally sweet. Travis' line was priceless and perhaps the best thing to come from Dana making her husband come clean. Of course, I also love reveals in general...
And now you've got one helluva cliffhanger: Is Marty going to survive in your version of Endgame? *hugs Marty*
| NeuroticMusing chapter 12 . 1/27/2012
Well, it would be funny for Travis to grovel some more, but oh well. :P
Very nice chapter! Again, it was good to see Dana's side of the episode. I feel sorry for her, she's doing all of that *and* about to pop at any minute? Poor thing. *hugs her*
It's a good thing that you're stretching the parts out, that means that it's more for us to read! :D
Can't wait to read more! This is gonna be good!
| wtchcool chapter 11 . 1/18/2012
If they value their lives, they should.
Oh, Vince. Getting Trip an xbox is no way to get him to work on his math!
*Considers* Is that a quibble I didn't catch or...? Hmm. I suppose "appearing out of nowhere" works.
No, no, no. The detective doesn't tell Dana to be careful. HE should be careful. Dana is scary when she's ticked off.
That's right, Dana. Scales has no sanity. Hence why it never would've worked out. (Was he only there for the purpose of talking to Dana?)
Overall, great chapter! Jackals add an interesting element to the story and it's always fun to see Dana's perspective of Vince's actions- well, it is from our point of view. From Vince's POV, well... Poor bloke.
And thank you for sending readers my way. :)
| NeuroticMusing chapter 11 . 1/18/2012
Of course they should stop pissing off a pregnant Dana. It isn't good for *their* own well being.
All in all: This was a very good chapter. Dana wasn't a star player in Razer, but the scenes she was in, you seemed to hit spot on, and then some. :)
Vince is even dead-er than he was last chapter. *sighs* It's a good thing he's good looking...
Nice to see Scales, too! :) And of course he wouldn't hit on you Dana, he's not stupid like Travis. You're obviously pregnant, so he knows he'll just have to wait. ;)
Wow, EndGame is next, huh? *lip wibble* Even though there's probably going to be an epilogue, I'm still sad to know that this story is numbered.
Ah well. More stories where that one came from. :) Good work on this chapter.
Looking forward to more!
| dem bones chapter 2 . 1/13/2012
She was pregnant during that time?
This is a brilliant AU. I've only seen the first two episodes but I can't wait to read the rest of this fic.
| wtchcool chapter 10 . 1/11/2012
Ohh. Two episodes in one chapter? :)
Aw. Arrested every week? And here I thought Lofgren was relatively normal.
Dear lord. I hope Travis was asking her to join them for a non-alcoholic drink, seeing as how Dana's pregnant. I mean, how stupid could he be? (And the perception of sleaziness probably does have to do with the fact that he doesn't know Vince is alive, which isn't his fault.)
Lol. Does Dana not think the drug dealer's a good babysitter?
Poor Peter, having his press conference ruined. On the other hand, that'd be the least of his concerns if he knew what happened to his daughter.
Quibbles: 1. I believe the 'H' in Travis' last name should be capitalized. 2. Dana should have been sitting "on" a bench, not "n a bench." 3. Left out the "g" in "her motives for bringing in the Jackals..." 4. Peter should've been more rattled than he'd let "on", not "one."
Otherwise, great chapter. As usual, enjoyed Dana's point of view. Glad Trip still gets his pizza. And as for the leash, does this having anything to do with a certain gutter? :)
| NeuroticMusing chapter 10 . 1/11/2012
Sure, Vince needs a big pink collar with rhinestones embedded in them. He could be one of those little yappy fru-fru dogs! xD
*Ahem*, anyway. :) Onto the constructiveness of this review-thing-a-ma-jigger-bob:
Nice to see Dana's portion of these two episodes. She wasn't in them much, so I can see where you needed to combine them together to get a proper chapter length.
Vince is a dummy, that is all. *whacks him with my old lady cane* Really, Vince? Your wife is very pregnant, and you expect her to come to you? *whacks him again* Think, Vince, think!
The Jackal's appearance was funny. I'll bet everyone is uncomfortable around Dana now.
So, Razer is next, right? Oh crap, it really *is* almost over! :(
Oh well, everything has to end at some point. Can't wait for the next chapter!
| NeuroticMusing chapter 9 . 1/5/2012
Hey! This was a fairly good, informative chapter.
Interesting to see a backstory to Pre-Series Dana and Vince that we hadn't seen before. Very original and I enjoyed reading about all of the Jackals. :)
As stated on AIM a few minutes ago, I like Winny and Hartman. I really like how Hartman was pre-occupied with his lighter's flame. Pyro background, maybe?
Winny is just cool. I like how he admitted that Dana was scary. :)
It's good to see that they all have Mother Jackal's back. (Love that name, by the way. :))
Curious as to how you'll handle episode 7. Good luck, sweetie!
| wtchcool chapter 9 . 1/5/2012
YAY, two updates!
Oh, it's hard to pick a favorite, but if you insist... I think I'll pick Jake, only because he seems to be the least insane, although I suppose I could be wrong. :)
Only found one quibble: in the first sentence, should that say that Hanson was "late of the United States Army"? 'Cause to me, that kinda makes it sound like he's dead.
Yes; let's blame Vince's apparent stupidity on his returning to civilian life. Now if only there was an excuse for why his old team would've believed he was Chess if not for that alibi...
No! Not a volcano! Watch out Peter! Lol.
Enjoyed the chapter introducing the team (and Dana's nickname). Am now terribly worried about Peter's health, and would also like to know how much a plane ticket to Franklin costs. :)
Hmm. *tries to remember the names of the states in the 15th circuit* *fails* *shrugs* Okay, if that's what I said, then.