|Reviews for The Lion King IV: The Rogue Pride|
| Incarnate Firefly chapter 14 . 11/12/2012
So the end is near. Well, I can't say this scene has been short on action, but perhaps you utilized the "big brave male lions saving the damsels in distress" thing a little too much here. Nonetheless, at least Kopa dropped that "your ass is mine" nonsense he had with Scar from the previous story, thank goodness. It looks like Simba's gotten through to him at last.
Onto the final chapter!
| Incarnate Firefly chapter 13 . 11/12/2012
Well, this chapter lightened the mood considerably. First there was Timira's feeble attempts to stall for time. Then I amused myself with the mental image of Kiara calling Kopa a dummy and dragging him by the ear and smacking him upside the head. Not to mention your breaking the fourth wall again, which is nine parts hilarious and one part mortifying (in other words, you're forgiven for what would usually be a crime in writing). I guess anything is acceptable with Timon amd Pumbaa. A little disappointed Kovu is sitting this one out instead of confronting his father, but I'm still expecting more action next chapter.
| Incarnate Firefly chapter 12 . 11/12/2012
Ah, so Madoa and Alama are Dotty and...what was that other one's nickname...Spots? Can't remember. Anyway, Madoa's an interesting character in her sense of right and wrong. She seems like a pretty rational lioness.
Oh shoot, it looks like Vitani's in trouble. You're not going to kill her off, are you? And I thought I was evil...
| Incarnate Firefly chapter 11 . 11/12/2012
Ouch, Kopa sure has done a lot of damage this chapter. I see he's on edge because of Adui and all, but he really needs to get a hold of his temper or he'll end up doing something stupid. And I mean more stupid than making Vitani run off or taking out his anger on Kovu.
Speaking of Vitani, I hope Timira finds her soon. I have no idea where she is but she's bound to get in trouble if she goes near Adui's lions. As for Simba's forces, I understand why he told Kopa and Kovu to stay behind, but strategically, it wasn't very smart, seeing as the two of them are probably the most deadly lions in the Pridelands that even Adui would have trouble standing up to them.
| Incarnate Firefly chapter 10 . 11/12/2012
Wow. For someone who enjoys writing humour into his stories, that was a very emotional chapter. And you sure did angood job of it too, I could genuinely feel the emotion every character was experiencing. Not to mention the action is very vivid too. This might just be my favourite chapter yet, tragedy and all.
| Incarnate Firefly chapter 9 . 11/12/2012
Well, this looks terrible. Not your writing, I mean what's happening in the story. I guess Adui actually is a bit justified about the whole Simba-banishing-out-of-hate thing, but it still doesn't make what he's doing right. Especially with the terrible slaughter he ordered on the animals of the Pridelands. Hope everyone at Rogue Haven is going to be okay...
| ILOVESiriusB.HarryP.SalazarS chapter 1 . 11/11/2012
I love your writing so much, it's not even funny. As I type this, I have a sirious face... :D I'm just kidding! I'm jumping with joy about how awesome KOPA is!
| Incarnate Firefly chapter 8 . 11/11/2012
Bhati, Iggy, and Tesma? Heh, is there any character you've overlooked? They certainly play an interesting role, and it's good to see that they're more help than Timon in giving dating advice. Yay, Zazu has a girlfriend now!
Oh dear, it's been three days and the anniversary of Mufasa's death is here. I have a feeling that something wicked this way comes, if you'll pardon the Harry Potter reference. There's so much irony in how Adui's followers hate Mega for keeping them away from Pride Rock, when he's afraid of proposing they go there because of them. Also, the one time Simba chooses to assume good faith might just be what leads to trouble later on. There's definitely an ominous feeling in the air now, and what comes next can't be good...
Spelling: You wrote "lounged about the kopje in a fowl mood", I think you meant "foul". Also, you spelled "shall" wrong again in "The king shale either fire him or he will retire." And "Your right, of course" should be "you're", not "your".
| Incarnate Firefly chapter 7 . 11/11/2012
Okay, now I'm really confused. Adui seems perfectly capable of understanding that Scar alone was responsible for what happened to both him and Simba's pride, and yet he's planning to assassinate Sarabi? What is going through his mind right now?
"You stupid old man!" Err, lion. But I understand what you're getting at.
Overall, I enjoyed this chapter, even with Adui's dark cloud hanging over everyone's heads. Kopa and Leo sure had quite the adventure, and hey, they got a full grown buffalo. And now I'm a bit more sympathetic towards Leo with this revelation he's made. Heck, I think I actually like him now :)
| Incarnate Firefly chapter 6 . 11/11/2012
And so the drama begins to unfold. Interesting idea, introducing Kovu and Vitani's father. I can see already that he's going to be the villain of this story.
I'm going to put Adui's sudden change of heart down to grief-driven madness. Nonetheless, it feels a bit sudden, not to mention unfair, considering that he still had two children alive, and that the Pridelanders didn't kill Nuka or Zira (Kiara had even tried to save her, in fact). And Kopa's bad feeling about him seems unfounded, since at that point neither the characters or the readers have reason to believe there's something wrong. Maybe if you make Adui a bit more...ominous in his first appearance, maybe drop a couple of hints of what he was capable of, it would make the transition a bit more believable.
And now I see that Timira presents the other conflicted character in the story. I feel bad for her, since I'm almost certain she won't end up with Kopa. Not sure how this will work out though, so I guess I'll have to see in the next chapter. Things really are getting interesting now.
| Incarnate Firefly chapter 5 . 11/10/2012
This is probably one of my favourite chapters you've ever written. So much funny stuff happening. Anyone should know that taking dating advice from Timon and Pumbaa is a bad idea! Still, it looks like Kopa's managed to pull it off even if Vitani threatened to rip his throat out XD Anyway, hope things work out for Zazu, even if I don't like him very much. I'm waiting to see what those other Rogue Haven males are up to, and if you're capable of being as evil as I am in your stories...
| Incarnate Firefly chapter 4 . 11/10/2012
"You're cute," Chumvi cooed.
"No, you're cute," Kula said back sweetly.
"No, you're cute," Chumvi retorted in an even more cuddly voice.
Afua looked sickened as he stared at his parents' unbearable show of affection. "Someone kill me," he muttered.
I had to stop reading for a sec because that absolutely cracked me up. Oh my God! I swear, your stories are like laugh therapy because you always find ways to surprise me with something funny in each chapter. Ahem...
I see you've introduced Joe as well. It's funny that someone like him would father a Pridelander like Tojo, but I guess you're just pulling all the stops and putting every TLK character in existence into the story. That's cool :P
Also, isn't Afua surprised at all to see Kopa? He might have gotten word ahead of time or something, but wouldn't he at least show some sort of joy at being reunited? Unless he visited Pride Rock with Leo...
Typo, I think: "obnoxiously load kiss" is supposed to be "obnoxiously loud kiss"?
Leo is such a little kid, lol. His character does annoy me at times, but at least he cares about his family and is entertaining.
Ah, so Timira IS betrothed to Kopa. That'll be interesting to see once Vitani gets a little more into her feelings. In the meantime, wow, the lionesses are admiring Kopa
Hey, Zazu's finally got his eyes on a little female hornbill. That's awesome, maybe he won't die alone after all XD And yay, you brought back Binti (wow, you really dug deep into your character research).
I've got a bad feeling about those other lions from Rogue Haven, and seeing as this story is titled after their pride, I'm guessing they'll be the ones to stir up trouble later on...
| Incarnate Firefly chapter 3 . 11/10/2012
Hahaha, that awkward moment you insult someone and don't realize someone nearby will take offence. But on a more serious note, I like the concept of Rogue Haven. That and Kopa's law are very creative and well-thought out, and I'm really glad that Pride Rock isn't polygamist (whew).
Can it be that Vitani has self-esteem issues on her appearance? I wouldn't want to look like Zira if I were her either, but frankly I like her rugged, tough look. It suits her very well, and I wouldn't say she's not pretty. But perhaps she's thinking of a certain male lion who recently rejoined the pride...? ;)
"Hey, Tani," Kovu whispered, moving close to Vitani in their hiding spot.
"What?" Vitani mumbled distractedly.
"What does 'fun' mean?"
Tani rolled her eyes. "I'll tell you later."
That's really cute. Anyway, I'm starting to see where this is going, so I'll proceed to the next chapter now.
| Incarnate Firefly chapter 2 . 11/10/2012
Asante is absolutely adorable! Haha, I see Kopa's not used to living with a lot of lions, so he has no qualms about waking everyone up. Of course Mheetu is used to living with him so he didn't wake up. And I think you meant "startling half the den awake", not "starling half the den awake". And lol, Kopa is always the last one to say "not it", some things never change.
I respect Kopa for his views on killing unnecessarily. It makes a nice contrast to what Zira told Kovu in that flashback. By the way, you wrote "Talk me, my son", when it should be "Talk to me, my son".
Ha, Kopa calls Vitani "ducky". I think it's a cute nickname, especially since she's so tough. And Rogue Haven, you say? I heard the name being mentioned in the last story, so it's definitely going to be interesting...
Wow, you really calculate the age thing pretty well. For me, I just don't bother with time unless it's in really long periods, and even then, I don't specify in numbers. But it's nice to see you're so concise with this.
| Incarnate Firefly chapter 1 . 11/10/2012
Lol, I see you're starting the story right off with your signature style of humour. I see Kiara like cubs...and Kovu doesn't. That'll be interesting for when they have their own offspring ;)
Kiara is cute as a cub! Even through words, I can visualize everything that's happening in the scene and everyone's very in-character as usual. It also makes sense why Timon and Pumbaa would be excited about Simba and Nala's second child since Kopa would have to be king one day. Good thinking.
Ah, so you're taking deleted scenes from The Lion King II. Not a bad idea. Not sure who Madoa and Alama are, but I'm guessing they're going to be important later. By the way, you spelled "shall" as "shale" when Zira is talking to Kovu.
I like your hide-and-seek flashback, it develops characters very well, and I can hear their voices in my head when I'm reading the dialogue. You really should give yourself more credit, you have a good knack for capturing each character very well in what they do and say. Also, the idea of Vitani's name being "ducks" is probably the funniest thing that I've read in your stories yet XD