Reviews for Harry Potter and the Grangers take on the world |
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![]() ![]() ![]() I was really liking the story until this chapter. Jinxing Snape once, fine. But Harry knows Snape’s story - and yet is willing to be the man’s bully just like his father? And then to give him permanent dementia? Sorry, but that’s a bit gross. I didn’t see your Harry and Hermione as evil. Now, it feels like they’re only using their knowledge for personal gain and revenge. :( |
![]() ![]() ![]() Doug needs to go. He’s getting greedy - to the point of demanding money instead of it going to orphans. Obliviation would be suggested. |
![]() ![]() ![]() Your writing style makes me feel are severely dyslexic. Your beta isn’t doing a very good job. |
![]() ![]() ![]() I do hope that the spelling gets better |
![]() ![]() ![]() Interesting story, hadn't expected the twist this chapter. I hope you continue the story at some point in the future. |
![]() ![]() ![]() Great story . hope to see more of this story! |
![]() ![]() ![]() An invisible coat might be better than a Cloak of Invisibility. Might be easier to wear, actually. Except... is an invisible coat like the Invisible Book of Invisibility? Can you even see the coat at all? If so, poor Neville. Getting a Christmas gift from Dumbledore that he can't even see. Hmm... |
![]() ![]() ![]() "his invisible cloak" instead of Cloak of Invisibility. Yes, I am sure at the time of writing this (2011), you definitely needed a beta for this story. If it was written now, I am sure you would be much improved in your writing and plot :) |
![]() ![]() Bb |
![]() ![]() Ht |
![]() ![]() ![]() This was a wild ride tbh.. It was entertaining but sometimes it was extremely out of it lol. Either way I enjoyed it so thank you for sharing? |
![]() ![]() ![]() I have given this up. To others I wish you well. Enjoy |
![]() ![]() ![]() You and your beta missed a whole bunch a grammatical errors as well. Makes it harder to read. You keep getting Doug and Dave mixed up and honestly Doug is such a git. |
![]() ![]() cerberus |
![]() ![]() Okay, this is unreadable. Half-sentences are bad enough. Missing important words, others are used totally wrong, and jumps between past and present tense add to the chaos. But what clinched it for me was your use of "vilify" instead of "verify". Learn the language and try again! And Dumbledore would never say YEAH. Let me guess, you are a young American? |