Reviews for Those He Leaves Behind
CuHnadian chapter 23 . 4/13/2012
I feel you man. I spent pretty much all day of yesterday re-writing one sequence of chapter 8 in MA2. Writers block really is a bitch.

Reading this I was at first going to complain that the structure of this stories chapter's were starting to become predictable. That was until the action scene kicked in. Ahmedov sure is one badass.

Keep it up, PEACE.
Rec0n412 chapter 23 . 4/13/2012
A very good chase scene. Once again your ability for environmental description really made the scene pretty damn vivid.

My only fault is towards the ends where you write "He would still be taken alive and shuttle searched for the nearest clearing in the trees." The portion "and shuttle searched for..." sounds like it is missing either an adjective, or missing a part of a sentence.

Finally, I like the way you portrayed the Cerberus operatives. You definitely gave the impressions that they were arrogant, over-glorified private security. With Dobart being the only real soldier among the group, and him being a mercenary at that.
Rec0n412 chapter 22 . 3/25/2012
A good read as always. I don't want to say your becoming predictable, but there is a certain pattern in the story. That may be the way you want to do it, or not. Honestly though the build, rise, peak, and repeat that goes on in the story is well done. So that the nature of such a plot isn't wearying, or dull.
CuHnadian chapter 22 . 3/17/2012
Yet again, I was massively confused at the start, but everything came full circle at the end. Another good chapter.

Keep it up, PEACE.
CuHnadian chapter 21 . 3/8/2012
Interesting chapter as always. I already finished ME3 and made a review for it so I think you can say I'm enjoying it. Even if like so many people, I felt the ending left a lot to be desired.

Keep it up, PEACE.
CuHnadian chapter 20 . 2/27/2012
Gable is one cheeky bastard. As always very well written and I'm looking forward to CH 21.

Keep it up, PEACE.
Rec0n412 chapter 20 . 2/27/2012
You know, Ward might be a manipulative bastard, but Gable is a vengeful SoB. So, I'm rooting for Ward to find his inner bad-ass. Impossible, but I guess that is what hope is all about, accomplishing the impossible.

Well written as before, but "she livid and..." seems to be missing a word or two.

Finally, I look forward to the next chapter(s).
CuHnadian chapter 19 . 2/21/2012
I loved this chapter, the conversation between the two was almost like a battle in itself. A battle which Ward clearly lost. I'd say this story is now in my top 5 on the site and it really deserves more attention.

Keep it up , PEACE.
Rec0n412 chapter 19 . 2/20/2012
I must admit, the twist at the end caught me by surprise. Although, I get the feeling that I should have expected something like this from Ahmedov.

So, Ward may or may not be dead, Ahmedov is gone AWOL, and Gable is still out there doing his thing. One thing, I like about Ward's almost-death, is that you again gave the description a way that links to a physical sense. That of the contradictory warmth of the extreme cold. I also suspect you might not be set to kill off Ward yet, but at the same time it would appear Ward is not going to make it easy for Ahmedov to keep him alive.

As always, I look forward to seeing what you do next.
CuHnadian chapter 18 . 2/15/2012
The switch in POV was confusing at first but ultimately made for another very interesting chapter. Now the mid level analyst was being a dick but Jesus Christ. I would ask if Ahmedov really thought that was necessary, but then again I don't think it would have fit this story if it happened any other way.

Keep it up, PEACE.
luk3us chapter 17 . 2/5/2012
You know despite your main character being a heartless child murder, he's kind of a nice guy. Not the kind of guy you'd bring home to mum and dad, or tell where you live, but you know, nice.

I always like reading stories were Shepard isn't a damned born again Paragon, and the universe isn't all flowers and roses. Since you're moving onto the ME2 part of the story now, it'll be interesting to see how you portray Shepard.

Looking forward to more. :)
CuHnadian chapter 17 . 2/4/2012
I think it would be good if you showed the date at the start of each chapter or flashback. That way nobody gets confused.

Keep it up, PEACE.
Rec0n412 chapter 17 . 2/4/2012
Only found one minor error as far as grammar goes:

"Phalanx seems to have go it all five by five now."

"go it all" seems like it should be "got it all". I really have to mention that I can very much forgive that, as it is the first error of any sort I've noticed in the story.

In regards to the story itself...

I was a little confused by the semi-implied, yet still unannounced flash-back. Reading through it the first time, with the delay between reading this chapter and the previous one, threw me for a minor loop as I was wondering how the story had transferred from Craw's bar to the ship.

However, the middle of this chapter did explain the why behind this particular scene. As it became apparent that this was the explanation for how Gable cut ties with Ward.

Other than that minor gripe, I eagerly await the next chapter and the transition to ME2.

My only question, is how Gable's story is going to inter-weave with Shepard's. Is this going to play out as the beginning of the story, with Gable pursuing Shepard?

I also wonder how Cerberus is going to take the idea of a trained, rogue N7 marine looking to kill Shepard. Especially in the beginning, since that is when Shepard's cooperation with Cerberus will be greatest. As, in a way, I imagine TIM would take steps to ensure that Gable will not cause problems. then again, TIM may just assume that Shepard can take care of himself.

Any rate, i look forward to seeing how you answer these questions, and all the rest of the questions that arise in a story such as this.
CuHnadian chapter 16 . 1/29/2012
Movie version of Gable, mmm I think I would have to go with James C. Burns (Frank Woods in Black Ops). Another good chapter as always, PEACE.
Rec0n412 chapter 16 . 1/29/2012
Another good chapter.

Although, I do have to say that the organization of the three parts was interesting. If you don't mind my asking, why the elongated flash-back in the middle rather than the end or beginning?

Finally, I also gotta ask, since Gable and Phalanx are telling Ward to basically go to hell. Does that mean that the Alliance will pursue Gable/send someone else to go looking for information about Shepard? I know that Williams/Alenko will be pulled in once colonies start being abducted, but I always found it odd that the Alliance was basically just sitting around during the two years Shepard was being rebuilt. You would think that the Alliance would have at least figured out that Cerberus was devoting a lot of resources to something.
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