Reviews for Daybreak: Part I |
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![]() ![]() ![]() W fic |
![]() ![]() ![]() Owwww. OSK really did make everything better just so this fic can make everything worse, huh? God. I think seeing good mother figures get killed off is actually my least favourite thing in fiction (this is not necessarily criticism of the story itself, but fuck... i loved your Mikoto, and now you've gone and ripped my heart out). I'll come back and finish this at some point I'm sure - it's a wonderful story, and OSK was exactly what I was looking for, but I was not ready for that level of gutpunch tragedy. Especially the dread that came with the initial injury, into the hospitalization, into the "no mind left to find"... you had be scrolling through the pages faster and faster hoping to see a sign that it would get better (and the authoura note a few chapters ago promising that this would be a fricken fluffy chapter was real cruel btw. I think the betrayal if expectations made it hurt twice as bad - that note let me hope that she *would* get better...) but things just got worse and worse. It's a testament to the quality of the story and the characters that it hurt so much, but... yeah. Break for now I think. At least I know i can definitely still feel things. |
![]() ![]() What a tremendous fic. I really like how the points of divergence (Uchiha massacre avoided, different winner to the Kiri civil war) lead to many differences spreading on. The earlier parts aren't necessarily so different - Aoi showing up in wave, and so on - but they keep building on themselves until the final product is its own world, a logical progression that ends up in suchhh a cool setting. Team 7 et al join the redeemed Akatsuki! They become noble rebels fighting against the political regime danzoeads and enforces with dead flesh and stolen eyeballs! Awesome. Also- I love that the story is driving itself towards a point that canon started with and then forgot, which is that the Shinobi system is inherently based on training child soldiers to be killers, something something child of prophecy to redeem the world, and then Naruto just. Ends up being Hokage and perpetuating the system. Welp! I'd much rather they drive towards using ninjutsu for helpful purposes, like they seem to be driving to here. Anyways, fantastic work, both this and the prequel. Very sad that Mikoto died ): but her story felt complete. Congratulations on finishing these! |
![]() ![]() ![]() I can’t wait to see more of Naruto’s character development! So far it feels like he’s been pushed to the side a lot. Even the revealing that he has the nine tails in him was sped past. Amazing chapter and story so far! |
![]() ![]() ![]() I just finished reading this story. I'm very sad that the series will remain incomplete, but I'm still grateful for all your hard work. I know it's been a few years, but I wish you good luck in all your future projects. :) |
![]() ![]() ![]() This series was a delight. Thank you so much for writing these two fics. And congratualtions on your career! |
![]() ![]() ![]() Well done with this chapter and please update soon. |
![]() ![]() I think that the greater Pain arc (including Jiraiya's infiltration and defeat) is the absolute pinnacle of the canon narrative, and that the "they were pawns all along!" plot twist only cheapens its achievement. But using the canon twist to double back, make your own plot twist, and revisit the Akatsuki's original ideals is excellent behind the scenes plotting. Very satisfying. |
![]() ![]() I'm not sure it's necessarily *bad*, but one of the strangest things in this story is that Naruto's so little changed from canon. Sure, he talks about "having a family that took him in" when trying to corral the Nine-Tails, but this is only slightly different reasoning than "I have to protect the village and my friends", and it has the same outcome in every instance. It is, of course, bad to be a child soldier (and Sasuke's fit about "How dare Itachi wish to stop me from becoming as good a 13 year old assassin as he was!" gets an appropriate lampooning) but I think some moderation on his ally-seeking talk-no-justu see-the-best-in-everyone quasi-pacifism would be an appropriate consequence for being raised among the Uchiha. Sasuke especially gets a lot of scenes where Naruto's stronger influence pulls him back from canon temptations; the asymmetry of influence is, I think, too broad here. |
![]() ![]() ![]() wow this is so interesting. sad you won't come back but thanks a lot for the gifts |
![]() ![]() ![]() Great story sadly she moved on |
![]() ![]() ![]() I’m gonna stop your story here because you obviously didn’t get all of your information right. I was gonna say in it in your previous story but I’ll just say here, Obito was the one that helped itachi not madara, he was to old and weak to be able to do any of that in the first place, but you wouldn’t know that since you didn’t look. |
![]() ![]() ![]() Lol son of a...I assumed this would have a real ending. What a dang let down. |
![]() ![]() ![]() I liked it better when it was just Mikoto. Every scene with Naruto so far is just way too cringy. In the end, he's still a child seeking attention |
![]() ![]() ![]() YAAASSS ITACHIII |