|Reviews for Quit Confusing Me!|
| floopyrocks chapter 2 . 10/31/2011
Okay you have some very big errors in both chapters. i cant tell who's POV it's in because you keep saying "you". you need to change every single "you" to an "i". then it will look better. K I REVIEWED NOW GIMMEE LUKE PLUSHIE CUZ I LUV LUKE!
| Nyancat chapter 2 . 10/30/2011
Uh yeah awesome chapter as always but when you switch p.o.v it's extremely confusing to put in 'you'. That's not needed at all actually. You need to replace the 'you's and stuff with 'I' instead. Thats the proper way to do it.
| Charlyatt chapter 1 . 10/30/2011
You actually have a really good start and your writing technique is pretty good, but I'm just going to nitpick at a few things so hopefully I don't come off as rude! I'm only going to nitpick because you have a pretty solid grasp on how to write and I found your plot and characterization compelling with nothing jarring or confusing!
One thing I did notice is that sometimes you threw in the wrong tense or personal pronoun. I noticed in the middle of Molly's POV that you through in a 'you' when describing Chase. The same thing kind of happened in Chase's POV too, but maybe that was because it was second-person and second-person is kind of a wonky POV. Also, this is just kind of a really tiny detail that I always always notice, but: commas. When you say something like "Ruth nodded, "Me too, so what did you want today?"" that should actually be "Ruth nodded. "Me too, so what did you want today?"" You actually seem to know what to do with commas most of the time, but you don't use the commas for actions, just talking. (I hope that makes sense...)
Overall, I think it was really good, and even though it was just a usual farm day introduction, it didn't feel tedious to read or like I had read the same concept 500 other times! Good job~!
| XJacobXBellaX chapter 2 . 10/30/2011
I loved it! The characters are great! Luke *sigh of love* xD I couldn't stop laughing when I found out he was drunk. :D Chase is so cute!
| Nyancat chapter 1 . 10/30/2011
I like it so far! The love interest should be...hmm...idk Luke maybe. Well update soon hehe