Reviews for Off the Shoulder of Orion
Jump Highly chapter 10 . 1/11/2012
It's all so deliciously intriguing! You've done a great job of setting up a list of suspects that is thoroughly unappealing, even in it's non-Voyager additions. I'm also really appreciating how you handle that DQ divide, from how Ayala and Nicoletti slip into calling Tom by his first name to zany stories and black humor and confusion,

The Doctor, of course, remains a source of great merriment, and you write him excellently. So glad he's on board, smelling foul and all. I also greatly appreciate your care with scientific details, fictional and otherwise. There's clearly great thought and consistency in yur science fiction, but you manage that without the explanations becoming ponderous.

Sorry for the delays in review; I'm overseas on a project right now and just haven't been able to keep up, so I just read several chapters. But what a wonderful treat they were. Keep up the good work!
Raiining chapter 10 . 1/7/2012
Oh, good chapter. Miral is so cute. And wanted to say, love that we're getting more B in this story. Cant wait for the next chapter!
Runawaymetaphor chapter 10 . 1/6/2012
""That still doesn't explain why a woman would want to participate in the … abuse of other women," Nicoletti frowned.

"And just what makes you think men have cornered the market on ruthlessness?" The Doctor's voice, although it was starting to slow down perceptibly now under the weight of the unexpurgated data from Kalpak Station, still managed to hold a measure of acerbity." "

One of the Doctor's sharper observations. Though admittedly, I envy Nicoletti's apparent lack of intimacy with the relevant... sociological phenomena.
CrlkSeasons chapter 10 . 1/4/2012
I can identify with Tom in the recycling compartment, filtering incoming comm traffic while trying to process the information available to him - a discussion about gender and wrong doing, the image of the Doctor as a dill pickle, crewman Cor Zelis, the demonstration of profound sensitivity and respect when Asil asks Lamarr for her permission before passing her information along to the Captain, Miral's naive revelation that the Captain's wife is free to tell him that he's an idiot if he ends up getting hurt on one of his missions, and the fact that the Orion Syndicate's reach is extending farther into Federation space which sets an ominous tone for this and any other stories that may follow. This is such a densely layered chapter that it's going to take several readings to process it fully.
Nana Evans chapter 10 . 1/4/2012
You're early! That's why I love holydays...

Back to the story... Things are not looking good for our favorite Captain: the only doubts about the traitor would be between his XO, who's also a friend, or a crewman he probabily don't know nothing about besides the name. And things are pointing to the Commander, after all he did volunterred for this mission...

Oh, "...He's a brave warrior and likes to help people. Sometimes he gets hurt doing it and then Mommy says he's an idiot, and Uncle Doc has to fix him up..." - that was by far my favorite line. Have I told you that I love the way you write about Miral? It's brilliant.

waiting for the next one!

ps: What has that poor jacket ever done to you? But it sure is funny to keep track of the trials that piece of clothing has endured...
tayababy chapter 10 . 1/4/2012
Hmmm, I'm loving Asil. She's so much like her father, yet so different from him at the same time. ad tht scene down in the nursery with miral and lemarr was amazing; deferring to her for her permission was just genius :)

And I love how sincere and passionate little miral is about her family, and how well she took lemarr as a friend. It's actually kinda funny and kinda sweet at the same time.

As for the traitor, I'm as confused as Tom, and can't or te life of me think who did it and why...

Oh well, happy new year. I look forward to the next installment :)
beautyofsorrow chapter 10 . 1/4/2012
"Sightseeing," Tom responded, sufficiently annoyed at the interruption to snap back. "Lovely place you got here. Thinking of buying shares."

Paris sarcasm at its peak. I think I just died from bliss.

"Nausicaans. The equivalent to Earth's pachyderms, when it came to the energy output required to knock one out."

And again, that biting humor I so love.

"What would Janeway do? Picard? Tom Paris …?"

Love the "Thirty Days" echo.

"Sometimes he gets hurt doing it and then Mommy says he's an idiot, and Uncle Doc has to fix him up."

Ahh, the innocence of children. This was my favorite scene. Perfect in its simplicity.
Kurbits chapter 10 . 1/4/2012
Great chapter! There are so many great things about this story; how you portray the characters, the way the story is progressing and how you keep us hooked with the clues and revelations. Good job!
angelscatie chapter 10 . 1/4/2012
Great chapter like always. I wonder how Tervellyan met Darmoth Krall and if he is part of the Syndicate? Oh well, looking forward to seeing the next chapter.
TheNaggingCube chapter 10 . 1/4/2012
Wow! What a chapter, the ending bit so very very powerful.

Love love Schmidt's presence.

Miral I just wanna squeeze her to pieces.
beautyofsorrow chapter 9 . 1/2/2012
"Bring them back, Tom. And don't be too much of a hero. Torres out."

I love how this one line says so very VERY much about their relationship. And that you know these two well enough to recognize that.
Raiining chapter 9 . 1/1/2012
Loving this new story so far. totally betting that the XO is the bad guy. Hoping for more soon! Thank you again for writing
Runawaymetaphor chapter 9 . 12/31/2011
There are worse voices to have in your head (or your holomatrix) than that of Thomas Eugene Paris. In fact, I am quite positive it his litany of curses, not my own, ringing loudly in my thoughts as I bemoan the fact that I am review number 70- not one integer lower, for which I had been, uh, saving myself ... And my comments.
snow6835 chapter 9 . 12/31/2011
Wow, of course Tom would come up with such a harebrained Plan B! Hope they get Tervellyan out safely soon and find lots of good info out of the two away teams. Can't wait for more and have a very happy new year! It's been an awesome 2011 and looking forward to more of your fabulously written stories in 2012.
Nana Evans chapter 9 . 12/30/2011
Poor Tom, fresh out of drydock and he already has problems with his staff, poor Doc, he was many things in the last two chapters, but a doctor wasn't one of them... and poor Captain Proton jacket, that's the second phaser shot in a year!

Anyway, it'll be good to see Tom in action again and I'm really curious about the mole in the crew... hope you won't keep us guessing for too long.

Happy New Year!
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