|Reviews for There Is No Song In My Heart|
| Singkatsu chapter 7 . 3/25/2014
Nature and artifice are so beautifully interwoven in this chapter, it's astounding how striking it ends up being. There is a dualism that exists in Lumi's life, in the world really, and it comes out nicely in this chapter. On the one hand you have the imposing and mystifying city, filled with well-dressed, "refined," business people who act larger than life and drink at a bar that is attempting to imitate the natural brilliance of the moon. On the other, you have a small town filled with earnest and honest individuals, who act genuinely and show how wonderful humans can really be. In one, there are numerous expectations and conditions, and perfection is tantamount. In the other, being yourself is what is celebrated. I like how this dualism emerges within the chapter proper, as well as how Muffy, a product of the earlier system, finds herself in the latter. In some ways, Muffy was broken by the city, yet still fastened to its superficiality. With her eyes that remind Lumi of the sea (another representation of nature), Muffy stares the world she left behind with longing. Then, later, she needs to be reassured that the appeal of the artifice wasn't just her own imagining - it seems genuine and alluring to others as well. Muffy needs to be fixed just as much as Lumi needs a mother, and I believe the two can be each to one another. As a whole the chapter was well written and had an excellent flow. The only issue I could perceive was the transition between Lumi's thoughts of Forget-me-not valley and her starting to cry. It becomes clear later, and with knowledge of the previous chapters, why she is crying, but the reasoning is ambiguous at first. However, this can also be an excellent example of show and discover, rather than tell, so editing isn't strictly necessary. All in all, I really enjoyed it and I can't wait to see what happens next!
| Jejune chapter 7 . 3/7/2014
Yay! I'm so happy to see this has updated after so long! I would always check back every few weeks to see if there was anything new, ahaha. It's been killing me, the significance of the prologue, what exactly is is in the shed, what the letter said (which has now been answered), all that stuff.
You're writing is really wonderful, as usual. It's so rhythmic and relaxing to read. And you always come up with great metaphors and similes that aren't silly or flowery. It's a pleasure. I hope to see more of this story in the near future. It'd be so sad to see it abandoned.
| supermassive ego chapter 7 . 1/6/2014
lemme ask you a question: when you described Mary's writing, did you basically just describe your own and change the names because holy heck you have such a way with words it's amazing
like your description and characterisation of everyone is fantastic where do i even begin
all the descriptions you write of the people and the places and everything read like poetry. like really good poetry. but the best thing is that you're not even going overboard with it, you just kind of have a really nice balance between simple and complex and it's all layered and pretty and it's so lovely to read
sadly there aren't many fics featuring Forget-Me-Not on here, much less ones that feature Lumina without Rock as a significant factor, but her perspective here is explained so wonderfully it makes up for all that ten times over
heck this fic isn't even finished and already it shows more promise than the majority of published original fiction
you did good
| bsinoranges chapter 6 . 3/5/2013
THIS. IS. AMAZING. I never really read any lumina fan fictions but this is one of the best one I've read. Can't wait for the next chapter :)
| Jejune chapter 1 . 4/26/2012
I'm really loving this so far. I've always wanted to do a fic on what happened to Lumina's parents, but could never think of anything. Either nobody else was writing one either, or the ones that were out there were dead or no good.
But this is great! Please continue. Your style of writing is really fluid and relaxing. Especially Muffy's parts. It feels like she's talking to a rhythm and it' wonderful.
| Singkatsu chapter 5 . 2/1/2012
Muffy *_* I absolutely adore her! That and the way Lumina is both fascinated and bothered by her. She's a belle in this, managing to be both hilarious and a little bit ditzy. Her nickname for Lumina, fascination with the city and talking relentlessly suit her character perfectly, so you've done a very good job. Lumina's poetic nature really emerges in this chapter also, spinning her thoughts into a beautiful whirlwind of images which are very vibrant and colorful. Hmm, the girl is a little bit smitten I see~ Oh, and have I mentioned how much I love the way Lumi and Muffy talk? Whether alone or together, they're vocabulary is spot-on for their characters and does wonders for showcasing their personalities.
| Singkatsu chapter 4 . 2/1/2012
God, what a tease you are! Getting us reared up for an answer only to find out that there's a mail strike. Poor Lumina, she certainly doesn't deserve this kind of suspense, nor should poor Sebastian be subject to worrying about her. Though I'm glad she's inquiring into the shed again, regardless of her emotional state, and the 'story' surrounding it. Oh Uncle Duncan indeed, he who came before~ Lumina's thoughts on the matter are definitely unique, as well as intriguing; not something you'd expect from someone who grew up surrounded by such luxury. She's extremely mature and at times almost detached, a personality trait which I find you display very well. I love the way you write and explain her thought process, it's been marvelous so far. Keep up the good work!
| MorWolfMor chapter 6 . 1/14/2012
Awww she finally gets the letter, but we don't know what it says? Darn it :p hahaha good job on the chapter, I liked how muddy used drinking as an analogy for the city. It was interesting :)
| Xleisa chapter 5 . 1/8/2012
I am loving your story. :D Right when you start to read it, it just pulls you in. It's fantastic. And your writing style? Amazing. So descriptive and flowing. :3 Keep up the good work!
| The Mocking J chapter 5 . 1/8/2012
Another great chapter- I especially like how you portrayed Muffy and Griffin. Your descriptions were spot on!
So, now they might be heading to the city... I sense a little adventure coming on.
| Singkatsu chapter 3 . 1/8/2012
I love when people put the Mineral Towners into their stories, it feels like I've seen so little of them otherwise that it tends to be extremely refreshing when they are added, particularly Mary. Even if HM:DS does allow for the people of Mineral Town to come to the Valley, I feel like fanfiction is a better avenue for showing off these things. Anyways, I absolutely adore the way you described Mary and her penchant for writing in this chapter, it was very much so on point. Again, the amount of detail in these chapters is astounding, with Lumina's way of describing the world around her and the people who inhabit it, you can't but be drawn in. Even Lumina's reactions are superb, whether it be her eagerness for Mary's story (which I completely understand...waiting for new installments is horrible) or just her general way of talking to Mary, I just adore her character. All in all, fabulously done and I can't wait for more!
| The Mocking J chapter 2 . 11/15/2011
Wow, nice Lumina fanfic so far. Now we finally know why the WP's shed was outside the mansion
I even found this funny- the part with Romana being like a three legged lion and she got mad at Popouri! :D There aren't really enough stories about Lumina, but I really like this one!
| MorWolfMor chapter 2 . 11/15/2011
This is very intriguing so far. I can't wait to see what'll happen next :) great job
| Singkatsu chapter 1 . 11/13/2011
Oh my goodness, oh my goodness, oh my goodness, IT'S BAAAACCCCCKKKKK! I've been waiting ages to see this story, I'm so very pleased you decided to start on it again! Quite different beginning from the original, with a focus on the Witch and her beginnings and with the Pumpkin festival coming around no less. The mythos surrounding the witches is particularly intriguing, what with the ritual and the sacrifices they have to make. The friendship between Griffin and Lumina is also very nice to see, and something that I'd expect considering their shared interests; they're both written well might I add, what with his accent and her manners. The amount of detail you put in this chapter is nearly mouth-watering (did I say I love extra details? Because I loooooove extra detail) and really does help create the scene. The title is also extremely curious; I'm excited to see how it comes into play. All in all, a beautiful reboot to this previously discontinued multi-chapter, I can't wait to see what you do next!