Reviews for Bannon & Zevran Bk I: Origins : Prelude
thinkdragonage chapter 6 . 1/8/2015
I really adored this chapter-I think it's my favorite one yet. I love the focus on just these two characters and how they are going to relate to each other. The sparring match was fantastic, and I loved the way you concluded it, with Bannon getting the upper hand. (Interesting references to his blood rage...or thirst for battle, or whatever you call it)

And of course, for a city kid like Bannon the noises of the "woodlands" (not the deep forest, hehe) would seem crazy loud and weird. Loved that detail!
thinkdragonage chapter 5 . 12/27/2014
I am so impressed by the action in this chapter-I was on the edge of my seat for the entire encounter with Vaughn. I mean, I figured you wouldn't kill Bannon so quickly, but you really made the differences in their abilities (which makes so much sense, given their backgrounds) factor into the fight. Very nice job!

And of course, the rest is tragic and heartbreaking. Soris at Fort Dakon? Oh no :(
thinkdragonage chapter 4 . 12/24/2014
I'm impressed at all the action in this chapter! It is hard to do well, but your description is vivid and engaging. I really liked the poison plan (and Bannon's cockiness is great, even if it is feigned at times) and I really liked the elf who helped them in the kitchens. I'm sure Vaughn's elven servants won't mourn him...
thinkdragonage chapter 2 . 12/20/2014
A delightful introduction to the Tabris clan! I do love that family, and they are presented lovingly here. Bannon is quite the character-I have a soft spot for charming lotharios, I think (which is why I love Zevran!)

I love your descriptive writing-creating imagery is something I really struggle with, but you did a wonderful job of describing everything from the characters to the sky. I especially liked this line about the clouds and sun mocking him...poor Bannon, so not ready for this marriage. (And I really chuckled at his despair in being partnered with a smart, bossy woman. Ha!)

Great intro! It'll take me awhile to catch up, I'm sure, but I'm already invested in this Bannon fellow *grin*
Destined For Hell chapter 1 . 5/5/2013
This series is awesome. I love some of the changes you make from canon. Although I started with Bannon & Zevran Bk I: Origins Ch2: A Wolf in the Fold so I basically jumped right to zevran but its awesome.
Oleander's One chapter 3 . 12/9/2012
You know mistaking Duncan for a templar isn't all that far-fetched. One man in a dress v. another man in a dress...? Iliked Bannon snarking back at Duncan about escape plans, and his general dialogue "sub-titles". :D

I liked the motivation you gave Duncan - I thought less of him with my first Tabris run-through for offering only his weapons, political implications aside. I had to work my own head-canon for it so it didn't bug me every time.
Oleander's One chapter 2 . 12/9/2012
The sunny description of the springtime alienage pissing Bannon off is great - that was a nice transition. ;D

I enjoyed the changes in the Vaughan encounter (and really liked the image of Braden as a fat mabari), and how Nesiara's bossiness played off Bannon's attempt at ingratiation. The sex life line is nice as well.
Oleander's One chapter 1 . 12/9/2012
I have a great affection for Cyrion, so those pair of lines: "Adaia had been his sunlight and gentle rain, until she had been killed" and "could look forward to expanding his dwindling family and indulge in the joys of grandparenthood" - so sad.
eatenbydragons chapter 6 . 11/17/2012
“He let his impotent fury smoulder, drying his tears to ash before they formed.” Beautiful line.

Have to admit I saw Vent’s comment on Duncan’s “Each Warden must be a power unto himself. Not a follower." Totally aggree with her. Unless Duncan recruited Alistair out of pure pity, but this Duncan is to much of a realist. Unless he had other reasons for recruiting… hmm. Duncan had a nice turn around in that scene though. Honor among thieves?
eatenbydragons chapter 5 . 11/17/2012
Ah, my heart goes out to Soris and Shianni in this chapter. Just so cruel. But damn, Soris is a badass! Way to go!

The way you wrote the scene, I actually feel for Elva a bit. Not a lot, mind you, but I can see she was panicked and thought she was doing what's right for the alienage in preventing a purge. Hmm. Still hate her on principle though.

Wow, but Duncan is hard. I know I said that before, but damn. Before he seemed like a realist. Now he seems more brutal than that.

. Bannon... don't scare Shianni after all that's happened. Dope. (Oh, I still like him, but he annoyed me in this chapter). I wonder how old Shianni is. I know she's traumatized in this scene, but her reactions make her seem awfully young.
eatenbydragons chapter 4 . 11/17/2012
Oh, this was good. Bannon’s story to distract the ‘observant’ guard, the effects of the brandy. Really shows Bannon’s resourcefulness and wits even under pressure. Heh, no wonder Duncan likes him. I can see why he would turn Valendrian’s hair grey, but he’s also someone who’s fascinating to watch. So enjoying your Warden.

I mean to say before, I like how Soris is a little tougher in your story than he is in game, but he isn’t OOC so much as an interpretation.

“Bannon pulled the sword free, slicing the apron string as he did so.” This was such a strong image for me. Very good combat sequences! Descriptive, detailed, and clear with strong imagery. Your best writing so far. Just loved it!
eatenbydragons chapter 3 . 11/17/2012
I love Bannon’s inner thoughts. Such a snark. Had the marriage been completed, I expect he’d give Nesiara quite a run around. Scamp. But his thoughts on his father show he’s still a sweetie underneath his ruses.

Really enjoyed Valendrian and Duncan’s discussion, and Valendrian’s views on the laws on elves. Nice way to include some exposition. The two men are such realists. Hard in a unjust world.

Vaughan is a total dick! Ugh.

I thought your description of Vaughan's estate was particularly good, especially how it contrasted with the elves' alienage.
eatenbydragons chapter 2 . 11/17/2012
I like how you've added to the game dialogue. This isn't a cookie cutter, straight from the game story. Your style is fast, good for action, and keeps me interested and reading more. I like it since it’s a big difference from my own ponderous style. I find it refreshing. Some nice similes too.

Seems like we both have a Tabris who is a bit of a bad boy. ;)

O.o I… so did not expect Soris to swear. Bannon is quite tricky though, isn’t he.
xseikax chapter 6 . 3/6/2012
I was glad to see that Bannon got angry with Duncan for not conscripting Soris; it was an annoyance of mine as well. I mean, the guy took in Jory, for crying out loud. Compared to him, Soris doesn't seem like such a bad option. Besides, Bannon's reasons made perfect sense; the humans wouldn't just let him go.

I liked the way you portrayed Duncan; seems to me that he's also manipulative enough to force the anger out of someone so that he can test them.

I loved this first part; I'll start on the second one tomorrow. I like the way you're developing Bannon's character, and I hope you don't mind the onslaught of reviews in your inbox XD I look forward to reading more of Bannon's story, especially when he meets Zev ;]
xseikax chapter 4 . 3/5/2012
When I first saw the warning I was intrigued b/c of the necrophilia part, but the part with Nola's body inspired the perfect mixture of horror and disgust, while still making it believable, if that makes sense. While it's abominable that someone would want to do something like that, it *does* kind of make sense that in such a world, there would at least be one disgusting person who would take advantage of such a situation.

I also loved the part where Bannon got his blood lust going while he fought. From what I've read, a lot of men tend to get that "animalistic instinct" going on when they fight, especially if it's their first time. You don't often see that in such stories, so I like how you take the time to show us how Bannon is really feeling.
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