|Reviews for Carousel|
| bratzs12345 chapter 1 . 6/4/2012
this is great
| MissKitty23 chapter 1 . 12/14/2011
| Simon wanna be chapter 1 . 11/27/2011
Well well...it would seem that I was a part of inspiring you to write...who would have thought? I am glad that I was able to help inspire you to write this story. I think you did a good job on it, it was certainly not what most readers expect to read. I mean they are more or less expecting a fairy tale ending, which this is most certainly not.
I think there should have been a better reason why Simon couldn't invent anything else...I mean if his confidence had been shaken that bad, then why did the portal work? I mean if he didn't think that he could make anything work then why did that one work and everything else fail?
I am not trying to make you feel bad...its just that I feel there has to be more as to why Simon couldn't invent anything else that worked...that is my 2 cents on that part of the story.
Otherwise everything else was good. I do wish that at the end you could have jumped further forward and told us how things were going for Simon and Jeanette. But maybe that's for another one shot? Who knows...well actually you do.
Now this is where I present my critiquing part of my reviews...I always do this in form or another when I review...I feel that you the author deserve some form of help in a non-confrontational manor. I merely point out area's that need work on. For example, in this story I noticed that were a lot of missing or misspelled words. I understand that as a writer its hard to catch all of the errors, however a good reread of your story might help you to catch some of them. I know that when I read it makes it hard for me get into the story when I have to keep stopping to figure out what a word is or what you are trying to tell me. I am one of those readers who has to keep reading and understand what you are trying to describe to me.
Other than the one thing I pointed out, I think this story is gold! Keep up the good work and I hope that you write again soon!
| ShyandStarryEyed chapter 1 . 11/23/2011
That was adorable! I loved it so so so so much!