|Reviews for A SCA Girl in Middle Earth|
| Guest chapter 28 . 7/21
The Marysue and Sam not The hobbit are getting better tô a level were they are funny in a irritating younger Brother way
| Igenlode Wordsmith chapter 28 . 7/17
Yes, I thought they were going to have trouble keeping Denethor locked away...
It's hard for me to imagine the iron-willed Steward cracking up and ordering the defences of Gondor to be abandoned at the first sign of assault when both his sons are alive and well in this scenario, though!
I like Suzi-Maria's description of the Witch-King raising his sword resembling "Gandalf when he was about to blow something up" ;-p
No shipful of hardened fighters sailing up the river is going to be stopped by a handful of challengers standing on the *bank* and threatening to board them :-P
"not only took off he tip of the bosun's ear" - "the tip"
"you and whose army" is of course the *perfect* feed line in this situation...!
"no way was she going out there to usurp Eowyn's role"/"No offence to you, my Ladies, but I am suddenly regretting telling my sister that she had no place in war" - putting all these extra female warriors into the plot does rather threaten to overshadow Eowyn's unique selling point :-p
And Tauriel fits the 'not a man' trope on multiple counts...
"turned to his Marshels" -"Marshals"
"un-breached by enemy forces since it's installment" - wrong sort of "its"
"the troll's build seemed to limit them" - I suspect from the context that it probably ought to be "the trolls' build", as well.
"If I were a knight of Rohan capable of great deedsbut Im not. Im a Hobbit. And I know I cant save Middle Earth" - all the punctuation marks seem to have been lost from this passage in upload :-(
| SortingHat chapter 2 . 4/30
You don't even knjow what fanatics are until you learn aobut Agenda 21 and the Fabien Society that has slowly corrupted America since the middle 1800s by hijacking movements and centralizing our money with fiat money to make our dollar worthless.
There is strong belief and evidence that we likely have used up our last gold during thee Vietnam war which they stopped auditing yearly where they used to before. Whistle blowers claim that the vaults are empty and we have been borrowing since then.
China props us up because they depend on us stupid Americans for buying their junk since their own people are too poor to buy it unless they are part of the Communist Party doing things their way then get special treatment till they are no longer useful.
See the man who held up an entire army of tanks from the 1980s and since then China has allowed limited capitalism where you can own a business but the government can still take it away and you to prison if you cross the line and they will kill you...secretly of course but kill you just the same.
| SortingHat chapter 1 . 4/30
I stopped reading as soon as you stereotyped Christians. It's a sin to stereotype any ethnic person but it's encouraged to stereotype and persecute Christians who dare stand up to their freedoms to speak the truth slowly taken away.
Typical Liberal shill you are or your completely brainwashed as the government *yes* person who not only think like you do but are not happy unless the whole world does.
| Guest chapter 27 . 3/31
All i can say is please dont stop!
| Igenlode Wordsmith chapter 27 . 1/20
"grey eyes scanning the bare craigs" - is 'craigs' a typo here, or just an alternate spelling?
"They approach a door" - either a tense slippage or a typo...
It's an interesting (and presumably significant development) that the horses do *not* consent to go through the mountain with them in this version, given that Aragorn is so insistent in canon that riding will be essential on the far side...
"the two men who didn't have a sword of ghostly command" - Anduril? Is it? And how do they actually *know*? Aragorn has been remarkably cagey about his intentions so far: he just walks out without telling anybody (save Theoden?) why, let alone that he thinks he has a sword with power over ghosts...
Presumably they have spent the journey to the Dimholt engaging in at least cursory explanation of what is going on!
"Isn't there a biblical passage about a situation like this?" - yes, I was wondering how highly-religious Sam (as opposed to Hobbit Sam!) would feel about all this ghost and haunting stuff: the Devil's work, surely :-p
"The men and beast must reach the end" - beast in the singular is a typo, I think.
N.B. from a strictly grammatical point of view: you seem to have suddenly started joining your dialogue to the preceding sentences with commas even where what precedes it isn't an appropriate verb, e.g. "Merry's face took on a stubborn cast, 'All my friends have gone to battle'" or "Aragorn spoke, 'Do not look down'". I'm not sure why, after 27 chapters and a large number of other stories, all of which seem to have standard dialogue punctuation :-(
"the devestated Merry" - typo
"Eowyn would bring the Hobbit with her when she came" - and there's an irony, of course! "if they were somehow victorious" shows us pretty clearly how highly Theoden rates their chances :-(
Ah, of course in this new storyline Eowyn is *not* the only female rider in the army, so reasons are needed as to why Merry couldn't have equally well hitched a lift with one of the others :-)
The ghost-passages are an entertaining mixture of the original mystery/horror plus snide remarks :-p
Of *course* they all look down as soon as Aragorn puts the idea into their minds...
"Legolas's voice was calm, but it carried a not" - typo
"Rowan wondered it that" - typo
It's a good question as to why the King of the Dead appears to have carried on decaying after becoming a ghost, if not because he was already dead and buried by the time the curse hit (which does seem unlikely!)
This little confrontation is very different from what I remember of the original; I'm not sure how much is invention and how much is movie-based, though :-)
We've got an entire *city* in the cavern underground and much more uncertainty about whether the Dead are going to co-operate or not. In fact, it looks as if this time round Aragorn fails to convince them altogether, although I don't think we can blame that on Suzi-Maria for once: it isn't the presence of the interlopers from our world that is responsible.
"(or what little they could see of it, hardened" - missing closing bracket
"wishing that he had more to go on than just Anduil" - typo
"to fulfill your oath" - there's only one L in 'fulfil'
"Aragorn surveys the dead soldiers" - tense
"as his army begans to fade" - typo
"on the other side of side of the cavern" ?
"No man wants to be embarassed" - two Rs in embarrassed
To be honest I've forgotten who Mairi's 'Godbrothers' are; are they her SCA guild? It took me a while to work this sentence out, but eventually it dawned on me that "even if it is only tarnishing his memory" implies "even if he is already dead by that point" :-)
(I wonder if a slight rephrasing of conditional tenses - maybe "even if it would be only a tarnishing of his memory"? - would make this clearer?)
"Slowly, Aragorn fell to his knees in despair" - so this is the significance of the absence of horses, I take it...
The Oathbreakers certainly don't seem to be very trustworthy/reliable! (And how are they going to reach the river/city in time now, I wonder?)
| Leisey chapter 2 . 1/19
As an Aussie, Lord of the Rings lover and an epileptic, I just have to say that I am so completely in love with this story and it's only the second chapter! I have never read a fanfic where people with epilepsy are depicted, and I was incredibly - but pleasantly - surprised when it was mentioned. So I just had to say thank you so much for writing a fic where epileptics are represented!
| Sara Pettersson chapter 27 . 12/18/2015
Blackmail, classical whatever it comes to a girl someone likes!
| Kin Pandun chapter 27 . 12/17/2015
Love it love it love it! Mostly setup, but still great. I can hardly wait to read more of it.
Thanks for writing,
| Gwen chapter 8 . 10/8/2015
The main issue I have with this story at the moment, and I don't know if you've resolved it in later chapters or explained it away, is that you keep switching between Mairi and Natasha. I'm pretty sure Mairi is your main OC's name, and so you should just stick with that, even if Natasha is her first name and Mairi is her middle name (or vice versa). It can be very confusing when one character's name is constantly switched with another. I had no idea who Natasha was at first. It's only in this chapter that my suspicions were confirmed. Just be more careful when writing/editing please. :)
| SMILEH123 chapter 10 . 9/30/2015
That's my account name I just didn't feel like logging in from my phone.
I am so, so sorry to hear about your twin. I have a twin, and even the THOUGHT of losing her is absolutely unbearable. She's my other half.
By the way I LOVE your story! It's a work of art! I was SUPER excited to FINALLY read about something with SCA folks in it, since I myself am a part of this amazing group
| Sara Pettersson chapter 27 . 9/12/2015
Do not stress with the fanfics, take your time to update them :)
| Virodeil chapter 26 . 8/31/2015
Type your review for this chapter here...
| Mystic Archer Horse chapter 26 . 7/19/2015
I'm back! Sorry I haven't been keeping up much this this fic. I started from chapter one again. There wasn't too many updates since I last read, I think. I do hope to read you soon.
Writing the last part of a chapter can be difficult. Even if you go from book practically word for word. I still enjoy how Suzie started out as a MS but is turning into a normal human...seemingly normal human anyway.
I hope to read you soon.
| Sara Pettersson chapter 26 . 6/30/2015
Yay! Finally a new chapter! I hope that the next ones will come smoother!