|Reviews for Magic's Touch|
| Shivanessa chapter 20 . 6/5
Aaawww, Hawke remembered the anniversary of his escape :3 That’s pretty cute actually. Since Fen has no knowledge of his birth date it is a nice thought. I like how Hawke explaines his thoughts, that let him to the party idea. To do something as a free man – celebrate special occasions. It is a sign how much Hawke cares for Fenris. In my understanding he wants to give him something ‘normal’ like a party with his friends, anything other than brooding alone in an abandoned mansion. And he made a cake! Awww! :3
And Fenris is his usually – or maybe even more – brooding self, thinking about Eddy, the letter and his sister. But there is again that spark of hope. I small thought abozt what might be, if he was truly free. That he could be with Hawke, if he was.
I wonder how Hawke got Anders to come along XD At the end of that chapter, after Anders’ outburst, appears the first hint what is about to come much later (even if you might not have planned it that time). Donnic is held back by his wife and the respect he has for Hawke to ignore that Anders is with a ‘demon’. There are many little things that shatter his respect for Hawke over the years until it ends the way it does in solitudes strain. This all comes so natural that there is no doubt that it could come that way…
| Shivanessa chapter 19 . 6/4
I’m not sure if “Fenris being obsessed with killing Danarius” is the most fitting description. In my book it is a lot self-defense to claim that he wants him dead at all costs. Wasn’t it more the fact that Danarius kept chasing him over three years, sending more and more men who left Fenris with the impression that his former master wanted him dead? Wouldn’t he ’ve been completely content to just stay away from Minrathous and start a life for himself Danarius he didn’t? In my opinion the talk about his wish to kill the magister results in his need to protect himself – to stop and face the tiger… (like you’ve mentioned in your kind reply :D : D :D)
Hawke is truly grieving in this chapter. Something that got a raw deal during the game, even if it is an essential part of his character – which turns out in your story excellently, especially later, when he does everything to prevent Fenris – his last loved one – from dying. He has lost so much already. The scene in his mother’s room touches my heart – the burning of the lilies. And that Fenris does not know how much he in fact has it in him to comfort Hawke. I think he has a sad image from himself. A living weapon. A pet. A running slave. But his sense of humor, his kind heart, his assumption of responsibility for his deeds and for others, his good eye for subtle facial expressions and the meaning of it – he’s not aware of any of this. I love the way you describe his being in this subtle tones and aspects.
(Why has my last comment appeard as commented by "guest"?... :/)
| Guest chapter 18 . 6/1
Nice thing that you let Fenris tell Varric and Aveline about his plan to find his sister because in the game these two are the ones who talk to him after the final meeting with Danarius. By bringing this connection up in this chapter it all fits together.
I always adore how you show Fenris most intimate feelings without playing the omniscient narrator card. To Aveline he can talk about that he feels he owes Hawke more than he can ever repay which is the explanation for his rough behavior towards Hawke and the fact that he is not asking him for help. Without this insight al that is noticeable is the grumpy, broody attitude.
“That means we're back to being awkward, but at peace, with lots of things we do not speak of. Does that work for you?" I like that line of Hawke a lot. He is an intelligent man who knows Fenris better than anyone. And despite this he’s in love with this difficult man XD I guess he likes it difficult, look at his other friends. I love this meta speech – Hawke talking about the way the talk and interact with each other and that he is aware of this but already willing to remain in this awkward situation they’re in instead of losing Fenris. Truuuu love *siiigh*
Fenris prayers sound so innocent to me. In many ways he is an innocent person, because he’s inexperienced in so many social situations. I guess he never had asked for something – except that he hired Hawke so many years ago, but that was not asking, that was booking, since he had paid for it. This scene and his little prayer hit my heart. He wants to know his purpose and he hopes that his siter could help him with that – but the person he means the world to is already there – the man he tries so hard to get rid of. *pressing the hand to the chest and sniffles*
Aveline and Hawkes relationship hit me hard because of what they had (especially because I had read your last chapter of solitudes strain the other day! Buhuhu, so sad how it turns out to be later between them! D: But I can’t say it too often, it is because of your acuratesse and the closeness to the game canon and the character design that it comes so naturally that I’m able to believe it would go that way. Anyway that is the topic of solitudes strain and not of this chapter…).
| Shivanessa chapter 17 . 6/1
I like that Fenris is a tough guy. He knows wounds and he had worst experiences than a cut in the thigh. Recently I was reading other fanfics and they often portray him as a weakling. I bet but he’s not. Something like a wound would not let him moan and complain – Danarius would have him punished if he did – and I guess he’s too proud of showing even if he’s in pain.
It’ so sweet how they talk about the dog and that Bethany was calling him Mabs. I laughed a long time about the thought of Hawke trying to imprint him on another name and little Beth behind him goes “Mabsy!” lisping like kids sometimes do to be cute. It fits to Hawke that his dog is called Mabs instead of Demon. And Fenris comes to think of how much of a dog he was while serving Danarius…
When they talk about the story of the dog and the dragon it comes out clearly what a different live the two of them had. Okay, Fenris is not remembering his childhood, but maybe his mother has told him story’s with a happy ending. But he’s not aware of that, he only remembers his time as Danarius slave and that wasn’t a time for happy endings. Hawke on the other hand had a peaceful childhood – even if his father was an apostate. Both parents loved their kids and cared for them. And now Hawke cares for Fenris in the way he was brought up. Aw… But Fen is not appreciating it – of course not, to him it is some kind of weakness to deny the sad endings. In my opinion Fenris expects a sad ending for himself so why bother with hope. Poor guy.
In this chapter we see that he is strongly trying to protect what little he truly owns – even if he dislikes the thing. I suppose that Hawkes consideration to remove the markings makes Fenris feel like he has nothing to decide regarding to his own body and that Hawke is behaving a bit like a magister. It takes a loooong time for him to trust the mage.
| Beth chapter 29 . 4/25
Magic's Touch was a beautiful story. I am not a gamer but I came across these characters and wanted to spend more time with them, it has been great getting to know them in a bit more depth than what I can guess from fan art.
So thank you so much! And I will definitely be reading your other work.
| OxymoraPL chapter 29 . 1/26
I have to say: I absolutely LOVE this story. I swallowed it whole in span of one day while I should have been studying for my exams (or something like that...)
I really like how skillfully you have put elements of gameplay in the plot - the way that I feel like the story really fills in the blanks without unnecessary repeating events everyone who played the game have been through. I mean... it all just fits so well together, which isn't as easy as one could think.
And the way you described Hawke, just every bit of it is perfect to me (I may be a little overreacting but that's the impression after just having finished the fic which is probably good?) - how he is tired of everyone calling him by his last name (seriously, that's what I thought the first time I played xD), how he makes this particular face before doing something foolish, how strong and broken he is at the same time and... and I can't type anything more cause the feels are getting over me, AGAIN.
One thing that would distract me from time to time were some typos (mostly trivial ones like "we're" instead of "were") but to be honest, I'm probably only telling this to make this comment a little less sugary and at least pretend like I'm providing conrusctive criticism here xD
Yes, well, now it's time to probably ruin my life with Lyrium's Hold (my grades are so going to suffer for my weak will)
| Guest chapter 29 . 1/13
I read all 29 chapters in pretty much one night, not to mention again feel that frustration with Fenris never admitting to himself what he needed and wanted. Boy its been years lol Love it 3
| Tayhlia chapter 29 . 10/18/2016
I will admit the ending did feel a little rushed but overall it was a great story. Your writing is amazing (not as if I didn't already know that) Don't think I can make it through Lyrium's Hold tonight but this was fun to reread and actually be able to review this time! :P
| Tayhlia chapter 28 . 10/18/2016
Lol lovely distraction technique.
| Tayhlia chapter 27 . 10/18/2016
I am so bright red now I probably match a strawberry. That was a very hot scene. I loved the conversation after though. Was very moving.
| Tayhlia chapter 26 . 10/18/2016
Okay so you know how I told you about that story that Hatse and I wrote that was almost identical. I have one that is almost identical to what Fenris shouted here to your Hawke about how it felt to be with Danarius. Totally buried on my external harddrive somewhere from my old computer.
Great and moving scene btw. Intense.
| Tayhlia chapter 25 . 10/18/2016
I always wished there was a bitchslap option to attack Varania. Hated that woman for betraying Fenris like she did.
| Tayhlia chapter 24 . 10/18/2016
Isabela hath returneded
| Tayhlia chapter 23 . 10/18/2016
Ggrrr. Foulness. Not the writing just the actions.
| Tayhlia chapter 22 . 10/18/2016
LMAO! "That when I see a blue light I think ooh shiny" I just about died of laughter.