Reviews for Chaos Theory
meemee04 chapter 1 . 1/6/2012
LOL! Too funny! Ah, Lucy you really are quite the 'blonde'! You've analyzed everything but the point itself - that Gray obviously likes you and everyone KNOWS! This was cute! Nicely written! Cant wait for more! C:
Wild Rhov chapter 1 . 1/3/2012
Okay, here's what I love with this story:

1) The characters are spot on. You captured their quirks perfectly.

2) Although there are sections that are heavy with dialog (as is necessary), they are not just line after line of words. You intersperse action to break up the speech, which makes this read more like I'm watching a movie rather than just hearing a radio show.

3) The part with Loki... okay, I'm a huge LoLu fan, but I was laughing as I wondered just how Loki and Gray's "little talk" would have gone.

4) Erza going ballistic over her ruined desert... WIN!

5) "Maybe it's Happy? He's cute." WTF? O.o You got me thinking Mira is a little loco. Then "Definitely Loki!" HELLS YEAH! XD

Now, since I believe in constructive criticism...

There are sections where your use of parentheses starts to disrupt the story too much. Although I know that this is used to create something like a reluctant undertone, some words can be said without the need of separating them. Italics might work too. Em-dashes work as well for the longer phrases that should be separated from the rest of a concept. It's just when you have so many bunched up in one paragraph, the slow becomes too jolty. It only happened at the beginning, up until the dialog kicks in.

This is going into my alerts. I know all too well the feeling of being a starving artist, so take a lesson from Lucy, make sure you get rent money first, and then work on writing when you have free time. Cheers!
MIKUNIN-NIN chapter 1 . 1/1/2012
Amazing... Just AMAZING. The first and last lines were PERFECT!

Can't wait to read more! :DD
IamDomo chapter 1 . 12/31/2011
Lol, I would have enjoyed this more if I wasn't sitting in a loud room with my fam partying, but anywho, it was still enjoyable - a super nice way to end the year! _

Hope your having a great time! Good luck writing! I LOVE THIS! :D

Your fan,

Domo
heyitsraichan chapter 1 . 12/31/2011
I love it! ;) Why don't you make another sequel for this?

I got a little bit...uh. I think this was a bit of a cliff-hanger, dear. xD

.you know me. *grins*
Julie Cross chapter 1 . 12/30/2011
Awesome fic! Lucy being sooo dense is really funny :D I haven't read your previous fic, but after reading this one, I surely will :) I hope we can see more of this story in the (near) future. We need more GrayLu love in the Fairy Tail fandom :D
x.Yura cont chapter 1 . 12/26/2011
God, I hate my internet. I wasn't done editing my review and it suddenly submitted itself! How effin' weird is that.

Anyway, um, I meant GrayLu, not KibaSaku. Forgive the mistake. I copied that line from one of the stories I was reviewing the same time I was doing this. Can you say lazy? XD But the rest was real. Seriously, man. I love you. Don't hate on me!

And belated Merry Christmas!

Ja mata.
x.Yura chapter 1 . 12/26/2011
Seriously? SERIOUSLY?

You are the best ever, kthxbai.

Must I say, this is a beautiful story. I love how you wrote it, and it was not hard for me to understand at all. It might actually be in relation to my own writing style. I tend to skip around in tenses, and I also happen to squeeze in as many words as I can in a sentence.

I loved this. I can't thank you enough for even writing this. It's been a while since I've read such a good GrayLu story. And even better, it's a sequel to your "Denial, Denial" (w/c was also effin' EPIC, btw!). You don't find those just anywhere.

You portrayed the characters so vividly, and I especially enjoyed how you portrayed Mira. I think you captured her cunning/manipulative-behind-a-smile-of-innocence personality. And Lucy being incredibly dense is too funny to handle! I, for one, think that you intentionally wrote her 'observation' in a way that Gray's crush on her is obvious to everyone (even the readers), but the girl herself. Genius.

I sure hope you write more KibaSaku fics. I would love and read every single one of them (

Also, a very good accomplishment for your first chapter! You did more than a wonderful job.

Ja ne.
Master Lisdt chapter 1 . 12/24/2011
Gaaaahhh! Tooo Cute, too cute, too cute! Please, update soon! :D
Hitomi chapter 1 . 12/20/2011
Oh my friggin God! Lucy is so, so, very clueless! Good thing there's Mira and co to help her out.

"Hook, line and sinker" - I don't know about you, but this simple phrase seems to spell a whole lot of trouble for our favorite stellar spirit mage in the future. Let's just hope the trouble is worth it~

On a completely OT note, I miss you! Hit me up at FB or hell, just email me, woman! Merry Christmas! :)

-Tomi
EternalDreams chapter 1 . 12/20/2011
Wow, I don't review stories near as much as I should but I had to for this one. I love all of your work but this one really stands out to me. I normally root for NaLi but GrayLu is slowly working its way out there too that I had to check it out, I'm really glad I did.

You did a great job on all the characters, from Lucy to Mirajane to the teeny mentions of Gray. Lucy's way of thinking was very believable as well and the relationships between all the characters were exceptionally well done. I don't believe you've gone overboard with how dense or clueless Lucy is with Gray's actions - it's actually cute and adds more to the humor. I also like how you included Lisanna. I've always liked to see her and Lucy as FRIENDS and not as "love rivals" like other authors tend to put them. Girl power rules! Seriously.

Good Work!
Galinda01 chapter 1 . 12/19/2011
I LOVE THIS FANIC!:)20 THUMBS UP!(i dont think i hav that many...)(screams at random ppl I NEED 20 THUMBS UP PUT UR THUMBS UP!)
melllifluous chapter 1 . 12/18/2011
I think Lucy's situation is really, really, really like Gray's situation in Denial, Denial. Except the fact that Lucy's doesn't want to admit that Gray has feelings for Lucy. Well, it was really fun reading all the GrayLu moments when Lucy had talk about it. I really want to see the part where Lucy, herself ask Gray about him liking her. I'm actually really curios to know what he would say to Lucy about that. It would be seriously funny! Well, I can't wait 'til you continue this chapter later. I just love it because you managed to make all of them in their own character, and how there was barely any errors in the story. Please update soon. I'll be waiting for the next one, even if it might take weeks - months. It was a really great sequel and I didn't even get bored of reading it. Merry Christmas to you! :)
Puma chapter 1 . 12/18/2011
Amazing! I really enjoyed reading this. This was such a good GRAYLU fic!
0Wishful-Thoughts0 chapter 1 . 12/17/2011
I'm interested to see how this goes. ;D

Well-Written chapter and being in Lucy's head is just awesome! :D

Can't wait to read the next part. ;D
151 | « Prev Page 1 .. 6 7 8 9 10 .. Last Next »