|Reviews for Right Moments|
| AnAncientBard chapter 18 . 6/15/2013
| irnzenmonk chapter 18 . 5/3/2013
great story ne
| Kreinster chapter 3 . 4/30/2013
I always search for stories with such a premise. Glad to find another one, I am.
How curious. Kodachi got it absolutely right. Not that others were wrong, of course.
Kasumi amazed me with her insight. To me, it looked like she understood Ranma's problem, and decided to make at least this one day better then others. Good girl.
Let us see how it goes.
| Mr. Qwerty chapter 3 . 2/18/2013
As requested, a review at the end of chapter 3. Disconsidering the slapstick nature of Ranma 1/2, mastery of the Art would be first order of the day. It's the core of his self-worth. It is unclear if his reflexes could be improved, since the Chestnut Fist improvement got negated, but only learning how to defeat opponents based on a chess-like move sequence probably wouldn't cut it. I also can't tell how much of Ranma's selfishness gets translated from slapstick, but he's likely to not consider alienating Shampoo and Ukyou as a good ending, as the first ghost-cat arc proves. Figuring out a way to have his cake and also eat it should be very important, even if it keeps the "losing" girls from achieving closure. Academic excellence and getting to know people around him (Akane's family, his classmates, the other rivals) would only matter inasmuch it allowed him bragging rights and accolades.
| Guest chapter 3 . 2/12/2013
It sounds like a evolution fic were he has almost meaningless strides towards perfection, whitch are promptly ignored for the next one until he's some sort of super bieng and owns the world with his pure awesome. but you athuers notes say your not that shallow and its a rather well though out set up so far so i geuss it depend on weather or not you can kweep up that triat. we'll see
| cakemaster chapter 18 . 7/24/2012
this story is filled with insanity. I enjoyed reading it a lot. Thanks for the nicely written story.
| Chargone chapter 18 . 5/25/2012
well, that was certainly interesting, and wound up nicely.
now, this may have something to do with my own state of being (still being awake at 4 am is the least of that issue) but the last few chapters... it got kinda hard to actually care about the characters. first because after going through all sorts of possibilities, you ran with an apparently unrelated one (though parts of it clearly had origins earlier in the fic) that seemed to go all to well... then the entire Sudan thing... it fits, but felt more like 'and then this happened and then this happened and then this happened and that's why they're now here' with a couple of deus ex machina piled in for good measure, without really advancing the characters or plot much. and finally, the ending (not counting the epilogue) after apparently having fixed everything, and wrapped it up... was a reversion to a variation of the same old unsatisfactory satus quo, which left a sort of bitter and disappointing 'well, what was the POINT?' sort of feeling. sure, Ranma's learned something and grown, but That had all but wrapped itself up before the Sudan arc (and the bit just before that was getting a little chaotic to keep track of, too.)...
the epilogue's good though :)
an interesting read, all up, but not quite a Favorite.
oh, my earlier review mentioned Nabiki and Kodachi... the Ranma pairing that seems to need the least work to end Well would be Kasumi though. (i've seen all sorts of variations that lead to that ending working out quite well... Shampoo is the awkward part to resolve in those ones if one doesn't want it to end in death though, usually. not impossible. just awkward) ... purely because i realised a chapter or two on that i'd forgotten to mention that.
humm. oh, when Ranma was skimming possible futures... the Good ending where he ended up with Nabiki, unless i'm forgetting something, actually seemed the best outcome we were shown... i'm not entirely convinced the one he went with was better, actually. well, until you take the whole Sudan sequence into account, anyway.
hope this is helpful. probably isn't helpful at all given how old the fic is, of course.
| Chargone chapter 4 . 5/25/2012
problem: pretty sure shogi pieces usually only come in black.
| Chargone chapter 3 . 5/25/2012
oddly, i've always been partial to fics where, for whatever reason, Kodachi manages to get it together somewhat and she and Ranma end up together. Likewise Ranman/Nabiki in a similar context (in both cases, the girls learn a bit of a lesson about life/get help, get less screwed up, and end up helping Ranma do likewise.). this is probably heavily biased by the skill of the authors of such fics of this nature as i have read, however. Ranma/Akane has always seemed to be an unfixable Mess if the change leading to it does not take place prior to their first meeting (or at least Very soon after).
I'd kinda like to see Ranma actually get his schooling sorted, though that would be tricky to do when the teachers don't remember how much he does and doesn't know and everything resets.
he should also take some time out to do some just downright Silly things that would normally cause major problems but in this context don't (because what's a good reality repetition without playing golf through the Stargate or something analogous?)
ultimately, if nothing else, he should realise how many of his problems have nothing to do with his honour and everything to do with the fact that the people around him are crazy. then do everything he can to fix the ones that are left... at which point the 'perfect day' would be the one where he escaped the madness.
of course, he'd have to do that without losing who he IS... that's the problem with solving one's greatest issues... sometimes they're part of what defines who one IS.
so... yeah, not sure how useful this line of thinking is, especially as the fic's finished, but... you asked :)
| Guest chapter 3 . 1/27/2012
I really like the premise. If I had to guess what events would happen (and must happen for a "perfect" day), I would say:
1. Ranma understands his own feelings (he may or may not actually mature that much)
2. Reach some sort of satisfying romantic conclusion with all his fiances (seems hard to do)
3. Travel as far as he can to learn as many new techniques as possible during the day. He may or may not be able to use a given technique since his body and therefore any training may not make it through the loop. (I suspect this is why Dr. Tofu isn't immediately available since he probably be too useful of a teacher to start with.)
4. Master the psychological aspects of his own techniques - mainly cat-fu. Since this might be better than trying to learn other techniques that he can't master in a time loop.
I'm looking forward to reading the rest.
| Ranmaleopard chapter 1 . 10/31/2011
Interesting please continue!
| dzk87 chapter 17 . 6/30/2011
It hsould be noted that this fic is the MOST EPIC example ever of author improvemnt. I read this fic once, and dropped it because the grammar/spelling at the start was bad/lame. I have NO idea when, but by this chapter, all the remains is an amazingly well written fic, one that skimps on explaining who he choses, not that any of us care. Great job man, keep writing.
| 1angelette chapter 3 . 6/28/2011
Well, I know that this fic is very old but given your phrased opinions on reviews I figured you'd probably like to see this anyway!
I find what you have so far promising, though the indirect style of narration is... kind of different. (For example, you commonly go "Kasumi realized blah blah blah blah', as opposed to "Kasumi began to think out loud. 'Blah blah, blahhhhhh? Blah blah blah. Oh, my.'")
The parts where you say "Ranma would regret this", in particular near the end where you say he would regret finding a cure for his curse, kind of puzzle me, and leave a slightly strange taste in my mouth. It's like, why are you telling this now? Basically.
There are a lot of little things in this story that I like. I do really like how you threw in the bit where Cologne claims she can break the loop with a counter-technique, because that's exactly the kind of thing she would say, not something you have her repress for the sake of the plot. Also how at first Ranma barely realizes what's going on because he's such a ditz, and gets used to the whole idea gradually, accepting it for now as a new version of routine. And! How the principal shaves Ranma's head before giving him an answer, and how Ranma quite reasonably consents to that.
I intend to continue reading this story, and leave at least one more review at the end. Good luck in your future work and any revisions you may make to this piece!
| Dairegh chapter 18 . 10/10/2010
Awesome story. : )
It started to drag just a little bit around the 'Paths' bit, but determination saw me through.
Otherwise? Great job! : D
| Thurhame chapter 3 . 9/8/2010
An interesting idea, and a very promising start. Setting aside all the theoretical problems with "Groundhog Day" style time travel, I like what I see so far.
I don't understand Kodachi's answer to Ranma's question. Maybe it will become clear later?
It's obvious some of the characters didn't really think about what this sort of loop means when they gave their answers. Sure, it's infinite time in some ways, but in others it's only 24 hours. If anything takes more than a day, it resets and all progress outside of one's own mind is lost.