Reviews for A New Tomorrow
BlueKarou79 chapter 12 . 3/25
For the most part I enjoyed your story, but it has some major issues. First is that you use the wrong word for stuff so often it is crazy. It is clear you didn't have a beta, but did you even proof read before posting? You also have a lot of incomplete or improper sentences, and your punctuation and grammar are atrocious.

Also, towards the last several chapters you started to have continuity issues. First Edward always called Charlie Sir, even when given permission not to. Then Charlie is surprised when Edward calls him Sir because he hasn't done it since the summer. Another is everyone was going over to the Cullen's for dinner both Christmas Eve and Christmas Day, and only having breakfast at the Swan's, but then Billy is coming over to have Christmas Eve dinner with them. At first I was like wtf? Billy is going to the Cullen's? Then I realized that you seem to have forgotten the holiday plans you had laid out for them. Also, you have Bella seeming to take Renee to Bella Italia 'for the first time' twice. Another was towards the beginning Charlie wanted nothing to do with setting up Bella and Jacob, then later everyone acts like he was all for it, even him in his own thoughts.

Also, when Edward and Bella pick up Renee and Phil at the airport they are waiting at the gate for them (you have to wait for people outside of security), and also they go through Port Angeles on the way back from Seattle (it is not on the way, it is past Fork unless you go unreasonably out of your way around the peninsula. A better place to say they stopped for a meal is Olympia.). Those last two are not continuity issues, just mistakes.

I also found your lack of having the major players reflect on what they read in the books to be extremely odd. They would have thought about it, spoken about it, planned around it, and in many cases regretted choices they made in the books. It would have ruled their every thought and action for months. Sure you have them touch on it and you have them following some plan they made because of it, but you didn't show any of that to us.

What I was interested in seeing was how you were going to resolve Bella still being able to have a relationship with Charlie after Renesmee is born. At this point I don't think the pack will ever accept Bella and the Cullen's. Frankly I think if you even tried it would be a forced story line and not at all believable, so in that case Bella and Edward will have to leave Forks, and that is so not cool for Charlie. I mean Billy will be all 'see?! I told you so' and Charlie will never get to know Renesmee. Plus I don't think anyone wants to see Jacob imprint on Renesmee, and that is the only way the pack will accept them at this point.
Twi-lover-1917 chapter 12 . 3/25/2017
I miss your story. Hope you come back to it:)
Guest chapter 12 . 11/6/2016
I guess you give up on this story...
AHealingRenaissance chapter 7 . 8/27/2016
Wow...seriously? People message you and say, "Update now or I never read again"? Like, "Gimme all your money or you never breathe again" or something? Oooookay...well, I shall simply say I love this fic and I'm getting sad since I'm past the halfway point of what's posted and I know it's been a while since you were able to update it; so, I hope life has at least semi-settled and that you can update it again soon :D
Angel452 chapter 12 . 5/1/2016
What will happen next? How will the trip to Alaska go? Will they read Twilight with their cousins? Please post more as soon as possible.
It has been awhile. Will you be continuing with this story at some point?
Guest chapter 12 . 4/28/2016
Hiya, I was wondering if you would ever update this fanfic? I loved this story up to now and hope you will continue. I remember when you did all the "Cullen's and Bella reading the books" and it was just so great! I really really hope you finish this
TrillionSchiffer chapter 4 . 2/13/2016
Gawd this is fluffy. I honestly don't care about any of Jessica and lauren or Mike for that matter, nonsense.

ANd the Wolf stuff. I guess, is the only drama you really have, and you got to milk it. But Billy and JB cause seemed lost from the outset. There was no 'plausible' way in, and without that, They are just as annoying to read about as Jessica and Lauren nonsense.

Well... I guess that is it for me. Nice concept, but the delivery was off.

l
AllyCo chapter 12 . 12/28/2015
Please update your story I know its been awhile but I really like it the wolves need to be put in their place
qhrciskrpc chapter 12 . 12/3/2015
Would enjoy next chapter also.
qhrciskrpc chapter 7 . 12/2/2015
I am Arro of the Volturi.

I do not make demands.

I mearly suggestt... Jane, do you think you could encourage this woman to write her story? You could? Jane, you are such a comfory to me.

See? Mearly a suggestion. No demands.

Regards,

Arro.
Guest chapter 12 . 8/30/2015
Can't wait for more
Clumzy.Person chapter 12 . 8/2/2015
Hey girl!
You still there?
Please continue writing!
A chapter once in a blue moon is better than no chapter! Right?
katniss12 chapter 1 . 5/4/2015
why have all your other stories been deleted
Guest chapter 12 . 3/7/2015
Love it plz update soon and maybe u could put your other storys on another website I miss reading them. Plz
Kitty Amadeus chapter 12 . 12/7/2014
Love it so much. Please continue! I plead!
Sincerely,
CdB
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