Reviews for Odd One Out
manx1 chapter 3 . 6/14/2002
bwahahahahhaha! a song bout a hedgehog...hehehe. this is going so many places so cleverly. You've obv spent time planning this piece-it shows, and makes for super-enjoyable reading.

as always, waiting eagerly for the next instalment.
Priscellie chapter 3 . 6/13/2002
Words cannot describe how much I adore this story. Absolute hilarity! I can't wait until the next chapter is posted!
intrasonic chapter 3 . 6/13/2002
Here's chapter 3. Bugger, the thing absolutely REFUSED to divide anywhere.

The first scene in chapter 2 got rewritten, although there isn't a whole lot different because of it. But as it was pointed out (thanks muchly), there were a few things wrong with how it was done. I'm going on the assumption that TT happens after T5E, since the Watch has Igor. So while I needed a few things to exist, it was nothing that couldn't survive a little rewrite.
peachsynapse chapter 2 . 6/12/2002
oh, come on - you can't just stop there. :)

the writing is pratchett-esque without being pastiche, the characters are believable, and i want to find out what happens next very, very much - so you're doing something right.

onward!
VimesLady chapter 2 . 6/3/2002
Whoa... you are so good at this, it's scary! There's paragraph after paragraph in here that I would easily believe Pratchett himself had written. How do you do that? No fair!

Okay, I sat down immediately and wrote seven lines to go after "...of all the half-brain, dim-witted..." and then rearranged a couple other lines. Then I realized, gods, how egotistical is that? But the point is that I can easily imagine Vimes saying those things to Vetinari. His City Watch has been damaged, so someone's got to be in Big Trouble. And he'd really like Vetinari to be the one to blame, because his conscience won't let him blame Carrot and he sure doesn't want to swallow the guilt himself. I just think that after a couple lines his brain would catch up to what his mouth was saying, take note of Vetinari's supposedly harmless gaze, and initiate some emergency temper management for the sake of self preservation. Which would mostly consist of adding , "Sir." to his initial outburst.

It's true that Carrot had 3 weeks after The Last Elephant to pull the Watch back into shape before Vimes got home, but did he do it? 100%? Pratchett might say yes. Pratchett allows Carrot to work far too many miracles for my taste, to be honest. It's more likely that he'd just have the core people (that is to say, all the characters we've become accustomed to, the Unusual Suspects) back to work, and of those the only 2 I noticed you'd missed is Constable Flint and someone else with a name like Visit's that I'm too lazy to look up right now.

AND (she continues to soap box), just who knows where in the bloody timeline 'The Truth' falls? PTerry, I suppose, but that's about it. The darn thing just floats out there without any reference to Sybil's pregnancy or anything else; my feeling is that it can't really be classified as one of the City Watch books. It could have happened before The Fifth Elephant for all we can tell.

Gads, enough of that! I should have kept this much shorter and just said, "You're doing an incredibly good job, now please get back to your keyboard and give us another chapter!"
VimesLady chapter 1 . 6/3/2002
What a wonderfully entertaining writing style! And I really enjoyed hearing a bit of 'Lords and Ladies' from Lucy's point of view. I think you've done a nice job of extrapolating the character from what she was in that book to the older and wiser girl who is still chafed by her past humiliation.
aren3 chapter 2 . 6/2/2002
Very good! Everything else I would say has already been said by someone else. :D
manx1 chapter 2 . 5/24/2002
i really really like this. its weighty, but worth it. ten points for the uber-feminist...one of the few (correct me if im wrong) ideologies PTerry hasnt parodied. Footnotes are v funny...im getting rather fangirl...will have to stop now...

...more please
Timeless chapter 2 . 5/22/2002
I love this story! I think it's excellent, and you capture Pratchett's style almost perfectly. I'm really glad that you're including Diamanda, sice she is an interesting character, and we hear no more of her after the events of Lords and Ladies. Someone made a comment that Diamanda's personality should be "I'm right-you're wrong", but I think it's quite likely it wouldn't be, since she had gone through a lot, and seems to have seen 'the error of her ways'. It's really good, please write the next chapter as soon as possible!

Timeless

PS: Pratchett is a British writer, so he probably wouldn't use the word 'semester'. Maybe the word 'term'?
ihadanepiphany chapter 2 . 5/18/2002
heheheh! this I like, not good at reviews, sorry. But update on this soon cos it is good!
emma chapter 2 . 5/16/2002
Great second chapter. Hope she joins the Watch! Please update soon. I'm really looking forward to reading more. _
Twist chapter 2 . 5/16/2002
Bwa! I love this. I thought the first chapter was great and the second chapter is absolutely brilliant! Please, please keep it up! Also, I love the length. Better to have loooong chapters that take a little while more than short ones that annoy you. Beautiful, keep it up!
doody chapter 2 . 5/16/2002
Hello again. While I know it's going to be relevant to the story I still can't let some minor things go by; you've put the watch as remaining reduced after the TFE business, but by the end of the book Carrot's taking actions to get it all remedied by the time Vimes returns, if not sooner. Also, if you decide that some of the men decided not to return you're overlooking the evidence from TT- where William is at the watch house, which is full of officers. You could, of course, be setting this before that happens or in a different leg of the trousers of time, but you haven't said that in the introduction.

And Vimes yeling at the Patrician? Surely you remember that everyone is to scared to even point a finger at Havelock? Anyone who yelled at him may just have to be escorted away to a quiet room so they don't die of terror when they wake up. Yes, Vimes got away with it in GG, but that's more heat of the moment.

Okay, enough griping: you have talent and skill, it is extremely hard to imitate PTerry's style without screwing yourself over, and to work in a plot is excellent.

(If it seems I'm overly picky and/or condesending, sorry it's just my nature so please don't take it to heart.)
intrasonic chapter 2 . 5/15/2002
That's chapter 2 up. I made a few changes to chapter 1, but nothing serious. Thanks for the suggestions.
somemadao chapter 1 . 5/14/2002
A fine piece of, work and I hope to see more
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