|Reviews for Ponyville40K Dawn of Friendship|
| HecatonchiresLM chapter 6 . 1/5
Great fun :). Love the idea of the laze-pistols and muffin-stubbers :)
| diabloelmo chapter 1 . 6/19/2013
*holds sides in laughter*
Oh this... this is pure art.
| Inquisitor Azreal chapter 1 . 1/16/2013
Oh my god... YES! MORE!
| Arkanrium chapter 2 . 1/12/2013
I would totally take Mechanicus Rarity with me, she's awesome!
| Rakaziel chapter 6 . 4/10/2012
Your story is a work of genius. You have managed to combine the themes of both MLP and 40K almost seamlessly and build a very convincing universe from it. And your plot is really well thought out and your writing is really good.
There were a few recurring details like the food-based ammunition that strain the suspension of disbelief (alternatives could be oil grenades (both very clingy to surfaces and very slippery when in contact with itself) and soft but electrically charged balls, or even a laser-based (to direct the current by reducing air resistance) low-powered lightning shooter), given the alltogether realistic setting. That and the names, though the latter can also be explained by heavy use of euphemisms in-universe. Makes one also wonder if there is something in the water and the smiles are partially chemically induced.
Another aspect that could be improved is the reason why Celestia is in the Golden Throne as the explanation is a bit thin. What maybe would work better would he that Luna's ultimate betrayal has broken Celestia's heart and it has literally not beaten since, thus requiring the Throne. It would still work with the plot as since her heart's refusal is psychosomatic it could be mended by her reuinon with her sister.
Some grammar/syntax errors but none so gaping that it would interrupt the flow of reading.
I do not know if you plan to post a seventh chapter or leave it at this ambigious end, but if you post one, one reader you will have for sure.
| Tzeentch chapter 6 . 2/14/2012
You continue to work on this heresy despite my disapproval...
THE PUNISHMENT OF THE GODS UPON YOU!
| Extraintrovert chapter 5 . 2/9/2012
Against all expectations, you have succeeded in not only combining the grim darkness of the far future with the love and tolerance of ponies, but in crafting the highly disparate attributes of both into an excellently cohesive whole. The altered nature of the Equestriam, its mission, its various organisations, its enemies, the weaponry, even the attitudes of the ponies themselves clearly take aspects from both settings but are mixed together as seamlessly as can be done under the circumstances, and it is wonderful to watch. At times the mane cast slipped out of character, but that's to be expected in a story of this nature, and otherwise I could easily hear all of their lines in their respective voices, planted into this bizarro world with only the slightest of difficulties. I greatly anticipate how this will continue and conclude, mostly for how Luna's defeat is going to be altered (because it almost certainly will), and partially for the prospect the other threats to the Equestriam making their appearances (which is less certain), as well as the development of the mane six's friendship in these completely new contexts.
Inevitably however no story is perfect, and while relatively minor this story does have its problems. Grammar and syntax errors and typos are replete throughout every chapter, and the abuse of footnotes continually disrupts the flow, traits which mar my enjoyment, and I highly recommend acquiring a beta reader to compensate. I also find issue with how the group are apparently able to stand around having conversations or otherwise do nothing in the middle of a war zone, though the fact that even the most sophisticated weapons use glue and pastries as ammunition might explain that (which, incidentally, is hilarious). Furthermore, I suggest that you move this from the crossover category into the My Little Pony category, as A) this is technically a fusion instead of a crossover, and B) the My Little Pony elements far outweigh the 40K elements. It would also expose this story to the larger audience it deserves, but surely that isn't relevant. *shifty eyes*
| Tzeentch chapter 1 . 1/10/2012
Tzeentch does not approve
| Dusel chapter 1 . 12/30/2011
Et tu, Mike Stormm?
| Darth Cruel chapter 3 . 12/28/2011
I have to say this is the first decent ponyhammer story I found. And it's brilliant. Can't wait for more, keep up the good work.
| Artguy0123 chapter 1 . 12/22/2011
Hm, Ponies and Cain. Interesting crossover. Can't wait to see how it continues.