|Reviews for Digimon Tamers: After the Reaper|
| Alexis Alexander chapter 1 . 3/12
I love it! :D
| MicSham chapter 28 . 11/22/2014
Pls do continue! Luv ur story there! :D
| Breezyfeather chapter 28 . 7/11/2014
Hey, you seem to have vanished. It's been a while since you've updated your profile and even longer since you've updated this story. I really hope nothing bad happened to you; the world can be unpredictable. Please do update soon. I might work on an artwork of Adman. We'll see. This story is awesome, please keep the chapters coming.
| OmnimonAllDelete chapter 4 . 6/11/2014
So, I'm guessing this sorta Rukato but I'm not sure yet. Great story so far though
| Wiseperson25 chapter 28 . 3/17/2014
Hello?You here?You been here forever!
| Yaw Average N00b chapter 1 . 2/21/2014
| x-eleven chapter 1 . 7/28/2013
I know this is going to look like nit-picking, but attention to details is important.
"He immediately went to the nearest pay phone and dropped a quarter into the slot".
Pay phones in Tokyo take quarters? Really?
"Takato smiled remembering Rika's grandmother who had once offered to make cookies for him after just meeting him, "Hi. This is Takato. Is Rika around?" The elderly lady..."
Ruki's grandmother is *barely* into middle age. She is nowhere close to being "elderly"
"Unlike the majority of the Tamers who lived nearby the twins were far off in Hongo which required a long trip via bus or subway to arrive".
Ai and Mako live in Shinjuku. They were staying with their grandparents in Hongo after the evacuations. It was their house in Shinjuku that Impmon broke into as he began his search for the kids. He found the drawing board in their bedroom with the message they were in Hongo. This long after the end of the D-reaper threat, they would have returned.
Details like these are important to doing a good fanfic.
| anon369 chapter 28 . 6/21/2013
you really need to upload new chapters, i only started reading this about 2 days ago and finished it today but think that now you should try to upload a new chapter about once a month so that readers have something to keep reading and ever since i saw digimon for the first time i was a fan but disliked how season 3 ended and this is brilliant for continuing it, well done.
| red neo ranger chapter 28 . 5/26/2013
Loved it keep it up can't wait to read more may the power protect you
| AnimeKnight151 chapter 1 . 5/8/2013
A very well written first chapter, you got me hooked!
| Delfim the Black kitsune chapter 28 . 2/19/2013
John old pal, great chapter I have been rereadying your entire fic.
I think that the last part was a bit to much. Poor Shadowmon.
Can't wait for the next chapter.
| Shiningheart of ThunderClan chapter 28 . 9/24/2012
-growls at ending, Adman, that was uncalled for. He was trying to help you, dammit! No need to be an ass about it! Do the others know about him abusing Shadowmon? I know they can't really do anything about it. But it would at least make me feel better! -mutter mutter grumble grumble- Update soon!
| hgjk chapter 28 . 9/14/2012
| Guest chapter 27 . 8/18/2012
| KendrixTermina chapter 13 . 5/25/2012
Dear John C,
First and foremost, I want you to understand that a) I'm in no way intending to personally insult you b) even bothering to review cost me time I would have had other uses for if I didn't have your best interests in mind c) I'm in no way claiming to be better than you, in fact, most of the critisims I am now going to present most likely applied to my own first attempts at fanfiction as well, I just want to share my experience with you.
Now that we have that out of the way, let's get to the point: I read the first chapters of your fic one after another, joyful to have found what seemed like a good fic: Nice characterization, fitting pacing, an itriguing attempt to piece the continuities of the CD-Dramas and the movie together, lots of cuteness and what looked like the promise of plot...
Or, in less words, I liked and enjoyed it. But then, something happened to dull that enjoyment, slowly, but steadily, more and more, untill I found myself skipping through mosdt of it looking for the once abundant good parts.
If Im writing this review, I'm doing it because the beginning of this looked so promising, so I think you have a good chance to improve if I tell you what the problem was and, quite frankly, the problem is Adman.
at first, I didn't mind him, who doesn't like some mysterious dude doing stuff, but then...
I'm trying to be delicate about this since you probably put a lot of effort into designing his character and creating an awesome hero the audience would like, and after all, you correctly deduced what sort of character traits are often found in awesome characters. However, as the great Paracelsus said, it's the dose that makes the poison.
You see, few real writers spend all too much time thinking about getting the audience to like a character. For example, to name one very popular character, Ayanami Rei from Evangelion. The director was totally surprised that she got such a fan-following, she was once intended to be somewhat unsettling.
The question that most ppl ask themselves are not "How do I make a cool character?", but "How can I tell a good story?/express certain themes/concepts? /Bring about certain situations?" and if that requires a certain character, they put him/her in.
The fan-following is something of a side-effect/ comes on its own once you've mastered the latter tasks.
It's important that your audience never feels like you want to shoehorn a certain opinion down their throats. That gets many people defensive. Sure, stephanie meyer turned her sues into gold, but you don't want to be a real artist, not stephanie meyer, don't you?
Also, the audience comes for their beloved main characters, not for your OCs. That doesn't mean that you shouldn't use them, I think there's far too much prejudice there, but what I#m saying is, the main characters should stay the main characters. If you had taken that same character and giving him screentime in equal proportion to takato & co, he probably would have worked, given that he looked promising in the beginning, but as I kept reading this, suddenly, he was in every single scene, even inserted into the movie, and all that was driving the plot was your OC, the story was all about him and his story and all sorts of stuff that bore little resemblance to anything we ever saw in the show, with the Tamers only being there so he has something to talk to.
On a similar note, he's too perfect - I see that you tried to give him vices and flaws, but the thing is, "flaws" that add to one's coolness factor don't really count, it's just piling more supposed awesome on your character.
Just look at the mayor characters and their flaws - In her need to act tough, Rika was genuiinely unjust to those who meant well with her and ends up ruining her own party. Both Jian and Takato get really wall-bash-inducing irrational in some episodes, and the results of Impmon's and Jeri's character flaws were genuinely *ugly.*
I.e., there is some actual impact, it's not all circumstance as with Adman, but them being dead wrong.
Think of "awesome" traits like of salt and spices - they're necessary for the result not to be bland, but if you put in too many, the result makes you cringe.
It's the concentration: You might've found many of these traints in beloved characters, but trying to put as many of those together as you can squeeze into the text is overdoing it, and the character stops being "tangible" enough for ppl to like him.
It's like he's there to be awesome and have things happening TO him - look at some realy awesome characters you know - they don't just have the cool traits piled upon them. For example, look at Rika, all her actions and personality traits including the "cool" ones flow logically from the basic premise of her estrangement from her parents and her need to be "tough" because her father wanted a boy. Her character developement is built upon that initial state, and there's some coherence, you can try and predict what she'll do in a certain situation.
It's not "shes a and also b and on top of that c" more like "a happened to her and because of that shes b and c..."
He's too uber-special - I mean, a giant gun AND a sword? In a story where no other human characters have those? A tamer of a made-up digimon AND a weird mutant? AND an assasin? AND lots of cash? What else, Santa clause?
One or two of these things, followed properly to their last consequence, would've made for a cool character, but all of it together?
An easy way to tell the difference between a cool character and a result of trying to hard is the following: Does the character make any canon character uneccesary? (Or actually, the other way around) Smarter than the smart guy? Cooler than the cool guy? more special than the protagonist? That sort of stuff. It's okay for your character to have one or two things he excells at since he has to bring something to the table, but you know, you could do that by just looking at the cast and wondering what it doesn't have instead of inserting more of what's already there...
I mean, do you need some mysterious guy providing exposition when you have Yamaki and/or Shibumi? Do you need another absurdly cool, gritty guy with a dark past if you already have Beelzemon? Do you need another older, super experienced, hardened tamer when you already have Ryo? Oh, and someone who instantly gets the uber suspicius abrasive Rika to trust them - why'd we need Jeri or Calumon anyway? And, don't you think that a character that combined all of these is a little too perfect?