|Reviews for The Dragon King's Temple|
| Cyres chapter 12 . 9/23
Oh, Oma and shu. You were referring to Omashu. I completely missed that at the end there. When you said "Oma" I only focused on that and though you were talking about Oma Desalah, which would be kind of cool. Huh, I really need to write some Stargate fics. Actually, a crossover between SG1 and Last Airbender would be pretty cool. It would have to be a oneshot (because I already have WIP I really need to write for), but hey, it could be a long oneshot :D
It's already canon that the Unas, or at least a group of Unas came from the same "primordial" waters as the Goa'uld, though, since the group of Unas I am thinking of eat the symbiots, perhaps it's not that specific group. But hey, it's canon that the Unas exist on different worlds (not including the slave Unas), so I can definitely see a place where things happen as mentioned in this story. In fact, I would say it is more than likely if we ignore some tiny facts and think in Stargate-verse logic :D
The memory Aang saw was quite interesting. I can't believe that was the last scene. I can't believe this was the last chapter. I can't believe the story ended. I think I'll go sit in a corner and pout. Just kidding, lol :D All I really want to say is, this begs for sequel.
This story has simply been... exquisite and yes, I do mean exquisite by all implications of the word. That last scene... man! If you want someone to collaborate with you on a sequel, or maybe if you're interested in having fanfiction of fanfiction done for this story, I would love to take a stab at it. Umm... collaboration would be marvellous, though. I actually plan on collaborating with another person on their SG1 and Last Airbender crossover, but I can add you to my plans. If you're not interested, that's fine, I do hope you continue this story on.
If you're looking for someone to bounce ideas back and forth with, do think of me. *bounces up and down with hand up in air saying: Ooh.. me.. me, pick me!* :D
Again, this has been a marvellous story. You're a great writer and I've enjoyed each and every chapter. I thank you for contributing this to the world. If it did not exist, I think it would risk the balance of the world. Well, maybe not that extreme, but seriously, this story touched me and reached me in a time I really, really needed something like it. Thank you :)
| Cyres chapter 11 . 9/23
Pheweeeh! Intense! I knew it was only a matter of time before Toph broke that battery. I'm glad I wasn't there with them, but at the same time I kind of do wish I was there.
"crocoman"? I guess that is one way of putting it. Lol :'D I'm wondering if we are going to see more of this past Avatar before the end of this story. I sure hope we do. I think there's going to be a lot of glass to be picked up :D
This story has been truly amazing. I'm kind of sad that the next chapter is the last. Oh well, here I go to read it :)
| Cyres chapter 10 . 9/23
The storm is the Yukiuso... that's totally creepy. Talk about hairs standing up like a troop, mine definitely was.
The people in the bending world are ancients? Now that's cool. Love how separated Ur's answer off at the end there showing what was happening with Aang and the others. The answer was like showing one of the reasons why Aang could control the stargate simply by lifting a hand. I'm definitely looking forward to what that old avatar said.
This story makes me feel all floaty and stuff... in a good way :D
| Cyres chapter 9 . 9/21
Nice to see Toph finally getting her healing powers. I'm still holding hope out there on seeing Air bending healing justu... I mean, technique. Perhaps since Aang is the Avatar, he might be able to combine all of the elements into a super scary technique which also would mean, on the flip side of the coin, he'd have a super healing technique.
Anyway, I'm loving the changes you've made to the original canon for this story. It's something that can only demand respect from me and also makes me feel like i'm not alone in the world when it comes to some things, but hey :D
Lol. I'm wishing someone has fanart of the pink-ly dressed Toph described at the end there, though, I am to imagine it fairly well. And yeah, finally, some much needed sun for Zuko. Hurrah for that :)
Right now, I'm kind of predicting that Aang is going to come back into the fold sometime around now. I think he's going to help out in defeating the Yukiuso. Just a feeling. Guess I'll continue reading to find out.
| Cyres chapter 8 . 9/21
Star-Eyed? That sounds strikingly like an Avatar state. Perhaps the "goddess" of Sanura's was an Avatar. Perhaps i'll find out more on that down the road, or perhaps it's not important.
Oh, no, Zuko's finally fallen over as predicted. Noooo... lol :D I can empathise with Janet's pain stricken hand. While perhaps not to the extent as in the story, but I have purposefully -yes, I know, it's stupid, but I was young at the time- cooled my hand to the point that it is not completely numb (meaning you still feel even if it's... not sure how you call it) and then introducing it directly hot water (not boiling, just... hot). I think it was custom science experiment, but perhaps that's just me trying to give reason to my younger self's actions.
My point mainly being, ouch. I feel for Janet :D (All while acknowledging the different circumstances and the methods of how the temperatures were introduced and through which medium, of course).
I'm still struggling with imagining the Yukiuso's form, but at the moment I'm struggling between something from Danny Phantom and the dark entity from Stargate Atlantis. I definitely shivered at one point in this chapter, but perhaps that's just coincidence. After all, the AC is on near me. Though, I guess it's also coincidence that the AC is always on when I read stories on this and somehow these stories have something cold in them. Yeah, I think Heather would see something more than coincidence in that.
All in all, I feel like this chapter has done many things, but the most prominent thing I'm jumping around because of is that... finally! They are working with Sanura and the misunderstanding between them and her is at least gone. Or rather, the misunderstanding Sanura had of the Tahri. Basically, it's an exciting first step to the confrontation between Jooty and SG1 that I feel is going to go down (in a good kind of confrontation way).
I'll cut my review here. I can definitely go on, but I really want to continue reading and as I said previously, continue reading I will.
| Cyres chapter 7 . 9/20
Huh... I'm wondering if Zuko needs sunlight to "bio-synthesise" the naquedah in him. While most likely unaware of that, that's probably why she was trying to get them up to the surface, because she knew that the sun was important to firebeneders. Just a thought.
I literally feel bad for Nekht. While I firmly believe that no person is a complete idiot and as long as they have their mental faculties intact to some extent, well, perhaps Nekht needs sarcasm, or a lighter view point. All I'm saying is he could learn a few things from Sokka and I would feel better for Nekht (I'm saying Sokka is an idiot, by the way).
I loved Sanura's back story. While that particular section was confusing for a bit, I could easily piece thing together and I simply loved it. I am kind of confused, though. Isn't Nubuity separate from Djheuty? I am assuming that Djheuty is the Goa'uld called the wise one and that his host is Ur, so is Nebet Nubuiti's host?
I realise that some of my confusion here may be because Djeuhty has things done similar to the Tok'ra's blending, but I feel like there are two Goa'ulds here and two hosts. Am wrong there? What am I missing here?
I love the humour at the end here. If you could call it humour. It was a perfect mirror of Sokka's "Oh, the universe just loves proving me wrong." moments. Lol :D
| Cyres chapter 6 . 9/20
Ah, I feel like we got something special for the mid-chapter of this story. Screw feeling... we actually did get something special, lol :D I really liked the added PoVs.
"Y'know, buddy – never thought I'd say this, but I'm kind of bored."
I actually that was Sokka at the beginning there. It definitely sounded like him, but it turns out it's just a bored Aang. I guess he too could sound like that.
Go Zuko! Love his reprimand of Aang. That was long needed in my opinion... not trying to be harsh here, I love Aang very much :)
The more I really think about, I'm definitely seeing similarities between the Avatar and the Goa'uld. Like, what same would explain as genetic memory (even if it isn't), glowing eyes (and tattoos in this case and even if the glow is white), and... well, that's all I can think of at the moment.
The Djhooty guy is quite interesting as well. Not your normal Goa'uld. I even had a dream about him last night and discussion between him and SG1 at gun point. Claiming to be Tok'ra, and Jack saying something very jack and then Daniel saying "No, I don't think he means the Tok'ra that know... think about Jack, even we are Tok'ra". You know, resisting Ra and all that and the system he set in place which my dream claimed that Ra was the one who cause the system of Goa'uld we know.
I even dreamt of an alternate name for Jooty. "Tok'goa" it was. Dream Daniel even magically translated the last part as an offensive slang word for Goa'uld (with the help of Teal'c, of course, so I guess not magically).
Well, enough of my dream. But reading this chapter, I'm really inclined that things are going to be something similar. This Goa'uld must be one of the Originals even if he's not a vampire (not sure if you caught the reference, I can explain via PM). I never really thought of what the Goa'uld "used to be" or even what really caused them to be the way they are, but this story is slowly changing that.
I'm really, really, and by that I mean itching, curious now (itching with curiosity) about where the ancients come into all of this. This kind of plays on one of my musing of "If you combine an ascended being with human, what do you get? An Avatar, of course" (directly quoted from thought form). But I won't bore you with details on that idea of mine.
I guess the only way to find out more is to continue reading and reading I shall continue :)
P.S: Oh, and Urdu? Good one :D
| Cyres chapter 5 . 9/20
"Not human? What do you mean I'm not HUMAN?" That sentence I could easily imagine Toph saying if she could understand what Janet had said at the end there. And also, not human?
But actually I could get that, though. I think, however, perhaps that the differences may be more on "Race". The people in the benders world could easily be another race of humans. After all, living with spirits and getting powers from lion-turtles could easily alter physiology, but that doesn't make them less human. I wouldn't argue that for the Asgard, though, but that isn't even a related matter, so enough on that.
I thought I felt the dark entity vibe from Atlantis woven into the making of the Yukiuso. The name, by the way, could be made into a pun for those might want to do it that would make even Agasa Hiroshi proud. I also couldn't help help but notice how befitting the first part of the name "Yuki" was for this creature.
And, ouch. Ignoring the fact that it takes courage to burn your own clothes, what Zuko did in the middle of the battle surprised me as well. I'm wondering, like Jack is, why he didn't do it before hand. I mean, Toph and him were speaking about healing and bone bending? Just wow. This is what I call "Take a superpower's base concept and get creative".
One small thing, or rather couple, or a triple small things that caught my attention in this story is that, Jack is calling Sam 'Sam', and in a previous Sam called Jack 'Jack'. On top of that, Teal'c isn't really being himself when it comes to his lines, but oh well.
Oh, I just can't to see Daniel's face, or actually, all of their faces when they learn the truth. That would make my day. Lol :D
Bone bending and not human... *puts hands in pocket, chuckling sarcasm, and walks off shaking head the Jackian way* (that's a compliment, by the way).
| Cyres chapter 4 . 9/19
I thought I saw the beginnings of Christopher Nolan in this chapter (I'm referring to his take on Batman, and if you don't understand, don't mind me. Just a connection between two writers... different writers acknowledged... grounding things to reality. Pm me if you still don't understand).
I loved the idea of the translation protocols. It would definitely explain why aliens are able to speak English. I kind feel like there's a rebuttal to the canon joke (I took it as a joke at least) made by Martin Lloyed in that Stargate Xtreme episode whose number I forget. Pretty cool the way you describe it. It's definitely something anyone writing a Stargate fic could run with.
I'm just wondering though, is the translation protocol and the Jaffa implant your original idea? I'm just curious, that's all. You're obviously a great researcher and story teller, and you seem to be well rounded in your taste for the arts and sciences (in my opinion and I think you're pretty cool), but I just wonder because you mentioned you got the idea for Iroh and the reason for his tea heating trick from somewhere else, so it just me wonder.
Yeah, I noticed the emphasis on food allergies and this is among the things that I'm loving as I read. It really takes someone to really think before they do something so that all can go well. If only the series had a bit more emphasis on this.
The revelation that naquedah is part of the benders is quite interesting. While they will definitely run out of energy while in the bending countries/world/universe, since they are in another world, it makes worried about Zuko at the end here. What's going to happen to him?
I guess I'll find out and more as I read on.
| Cyres chapter 3 . 9/19
I just loved the section where Toph and Zuko talk. The opening was kind of confusing, but after a few rereads, I was glad I hadn't started eating food yet. What I really appreciate about this story is that you take a children's show (which, by the way, no cartoon is made for kids... they're simply not for kids, unless you bring up the rugrats, but even then, the messages are for the adults), and you bring in reality.
Man! The realities that you just brought in this chapter would bring near horror. And I mean the kind of horror that goes a bit beyond the dose that one might receive from Katara telling Nini's legend, or the horror one might feel when one really thinks about blood bending. Man... You're good!
The reason given for Iroh heating his tea... yeah, I won't underestimate his gusto when it comes to tea, but the reason give, being to separate Jet from Zuko was simply an ingenious one. I'm definitely not forgetting that one, ever (not that I'm forgetting anything this story has told or will tell).
The cliffhanger for the chapter is well crafted. I'm getting the feeling that the creature/spirit from the planet they were just on followed them back through the get. I'll end here to read on to what happens next.
| Cyres chapter 2 . 9/19
Amazing chapter. I'm supremely glad they're so long! I love how you bring out Zuko's raw genius in this chapter. Toph is, well, Toph. I wish I present in the Gate room when she took out the sound system, it would have been quite a sight.
I'm wondering what the spirit was. Was it really a spirit or was it some native creature from that planet? Perhaps it made the crevasse in the mountain. I'm wondering if we're going to see more of it down the line.
"Awww… don't tell me I missed the fun?"
Yep, that's a pure Jack line. Lol :D
You've magnificent work here. I'm continuing on, but I hope that whatever story you are working on at the moment that you keep up the truly magnificent work :)
| Cyres chapter 1 . 9/18
I almost fell off my chair when Toph said: "Oi, chirabi-wa doko!" I mean, I just would have expected Japanese to come out of either of their mouths. Indeed, while Chinese or Sanskrit would be more accurate, I watched the show in English, so my frame of reference is there. It's not bad, actually, it's amazing and is among the things that make this fanfic looking so great. You have definitely pulled me in.
I hope Zuko's arm gets better. It would be... inconvenient if it doesn't. It's probably knocked out. Like, for normal who can't redirect lightening, one Zat would knock them out. In Zuko's case, it would knock out his arm. It would have been hilarious if just knocked his pinkie or thumb.
Anyway, I'm definitely reading on.
| Thespurgin chapter 12 . 9/17
I was literally left in a state of eurphoria following the completion of this fic. This stuff? This is fiction AMBROSIA.
Masterful work Kyral, truly masterful. I only pray the tale doesn't end here... because this? This is the genesis of something that could be legend. Now... to go look over your profile. Time to explore.
| MarbleGlove chapter 6 . 8/31
This is an awesome fanfic and I love it! And I was feeling inspired. So, your B-movie poster for Toph, Tyrant Queen of Mutant Ninja Were-Lemurs (I forgot about the flying bit) is currently on my tumblr, but let me know if you'd like me to send you a copy directly:
| Ambiguity in D Major chapter 9 . 8/24
With regards to your AN about strong/weak benders-I know this is probably nitpicking, and years too late- I couldn't stop thinking about the scene where Bumi is single-handedly taking back Omashu. When he topples Ozai's enormous statue, he's clearly straining to move that much stone, implying that he's just barely powerful enough to do it. And surely there were Resistance Earthbenders who would have done that if they could, right?
Which leads me to believe that we never see anyone fail because they know better. Basically everyone who we see bending outside of the GAang is some kind of professional, be it the militaries of various nations or the Dai Li or what have you. And trying to do something outside of your power range is the mistake a beginner makes, not a soldier who knows their limits.
Additionally, as a more direct example: Sozin's Comet. We see a massive amount of firepower being used in those episodes, larger than anything in the series. That indicates a direct increase of bending power, because if the Fire Nation could have done that to the North Pole you bet they would.
While it's true that we never see anybody specifically labeled as 'weak', I think that's more because you'd never call somebody who can set you on fire with a flick of their wrist weak. Rather, you have normal benders, like the rank-and-file soldiers in the armies, who never do anything stronger than tossing a fireball or a boulder. And then you have strong benders, who can perform much larger, more complicated feats like Ozai with his lightning, or Pakku with the waterspout thing he does at the North Pole. Strength isn't calculated so much by what you see the benders failing to accomplish, as by what they don't even try.
Well, now I've got that out of my system. I love your writing and I love this story most of all. Just had to get that thought out.