Reviews for Halamshiral
mille libri chapter 13 . 1/24/2013
I have always loved Alfstanna, and I love her even more here. She's smart and funny and understanding and generous and her growing relationship with Alistair is delightful. I love the two of them trying to matchmake their lovers.
ulicpav chapter 12 . 12/14/2012
This story is amazing! And I can't seem to stop reading it! It's very touching... and I LOVE IT! Keep going, it's AWESOME!
Bloodsong 13T chapter 12 . 12/2/2012
YES, thank you for fixing that! i'm glad lhaine was able to help his clan with these problems. though he hasn't vanquished the demon yet, or cleared out the darkspawn. well, what are you waiting for? ;)
mille libri chapter 12 . 11/9/2012
I like Zev's internal commentary here, and I'm glad you dealt with this plot, although as I often do, I feel badly for Merrill. Good for Lhaine lancing that boil straight away rather than letting it fester and creating the dangerous situation that can end so tragically in DA2.
Ventisquear chapter 12 . 11/9/2012
I liked Marethari's observation of how Lhaine changed - grew in some things, but diminished in others.

Though I agree with Zev that his outburst on Merril was about all other things, not just the little First, I couldn't help enjoying it. I loved how he took the initiative and decided what needed to be done, now. He's not a young Dalish any more - he's the Commander, the Hero, and it's very clear here how he achieved that.

And I LOVE Zevran here, remaning calm, analysing - and how there are never any doubts that he'll go with Lhaine, even though he doesn't like it. That's so Zev. :) I loved their little talk and hug at the end.
david9999 chapter 12 . 11/8/2012
Hi, Isabeau of Greenlea.

Well done on this outstanding chapter. :-)

I liked how Lhaine was able to help Merrill and to fight the demon and I liked how Zev is still trying to help him out.

It should be good to see what Alistair does when he finds out that Lhaine fight the demon.
enjoy your weekend, :)
ShebasDawn chapter 12 . 11/8/2012
It was very interesting seeing Lhaine's reactions to his childhood friend and the piece of the mirror Merrill had kept. I never thought about what that would be like for the warden. I'm wondering if Lhaine will be able to convince his clan to keep Merrill after the demon is killed. The hunter's point that Merrill has already been tempted and is untrustworthy is a good one. I always thought it was odd that Marethari let Merrill keep the eluvian.

I was really intrigued by your mention of the crow hand signal Lhaine used to communicate with Zev. It makes me want to know more. :)

This made me smile -"With a decided lack of anything resembling a sense of self-preservation" - so Merrill.

And I love all the cool word pictures you use, like "his eyes green flame". It makes it so easy to *see* what's going on.

I'm not sure how coherent this review is - I'm pretty tired. But, I really enjoyed this chapter, and I'm looking forward to the next. :)
Eva Galana chapter 12 . 11/8/2012
I love your solution to Merrill's mirror issue. Nicely done. It was wonderful how you pointed out a few things - like Marethari not just making a decision regarding Merrill's standing in the clan.

And Zevran...he's too cool. I love how he finally just tells Lhaine to please think before you leap; especially with me in tow!

Looking forward to the update; I love this pairing (although they are so far away from each other right now!).
ShebasDawn chapter 11 . 10/24/2012
I loved this story - the way you showed Alistair as more mature and kingly, Zevran's brutality in the first chapter along with being more open towards his friends, Alistair's and Lhaine's relationship developing slowly, and Alfstanna's character being more fully developed than usual. You pulled me into the story and I really hope you are planning on finishing it. I loved that you pulled some DA2 characters in, and I want to know what happens next...please continue!
Bloodsong 13T chapter 11 . 7/21/2012
well, i have reached the end of the currently published chapters. you know what that means! ::twitch!::

this was another good chapter, though a laidback one. i like lhaine's handling of situations. i'm fondly reminded of my first da character, my dalish elf. he wasn't as 'courteous' as lhaine, exactly, but he had a way of getting his point directly across.

lhaine's homecoming to his clan also touched me, and again, because of my dalish character. through an unfortunate series of unrelated events... well, valorien died at the end of da:o, and then later, his entire clan got wiped out while there in the free marches. it was (#*$&%ing depressing! i'm so happy for lhaine. i especially remember the scene in da:o, the dalish elf leaving the clan. that was so sad for me, too. so i can imagine how he feels. after so long, and so far away...

sorry, i'll stop being maudlin. now write some more! :)
Bloodsong 13T chapter 10 . 7/20/2012
ah, another great chapter! i do love how you flesh out all your 'npcs' and minor characters. makes them interesting and gives them center stage. now i do wonder what plots varric might have concerning the hero...

also love zevran, and his desire to better lives for his people. and his open relationship with leliana. oddly, there doesn't seem to be much of those with him. ah, and his keen talent at imitating a mabari hound! lol!

but one thing is still missing... in the last chapter, zevran was concerned about lhaine fighting shemlen. at first, i thought that was a little odd. dalish kill shems all the time. of course, lhaine had been horribly abused by shems, which i also would think would make him more eager and ready to kill them. (it would me, anyway, for sure.) but then i realized what he meant... if the shems had made lhaine afraid of them!

well, what DID he feel while he was killing all of 'em! argh!
Bloodsong13T chapter 9 . 7/18/2012
this is intriguing... i wonder where this young noblefellow is headed. i also have to wonder how lhaine felt while fighting the shems. but that's not a bad thing, it just makes me curious to read more ;)
and poor zev. you know he was just trying to offer lhaine some therapy!
Bloodsong 13T chapter 8 . 7/15/2012
man, you go all over the map, don't you? angsty and scary, cute, trepidatious, funny, panicky and hurt... yea, it's all good!

this was a great chapter, on all points. and we got to see inside that mysterious book that is lhaine. can i say i'm wallowing in enjoyment of this story without sounding... uh, piggy? lol!
Bloodsong 13T chapter 6 . 7/14/2012
running around in the royal smallclothes? was this a party banter i missed? lol!

i like this version of alistair, quietly strong and confident. i haven't read much with him in that mode. and i like the intimacy and trust, and mistakes made as alistair tries to help his friend and lover.

one thing i was thinking about this story... that lhaine remains more or less a closed book. i did find that a little troublesome, that i wanted to know more about what he thought and felt. but he hasn't been a viewpoint character, really. (which i can't complain about, because i do that with my characters all the time.) in these past two chapters (5 & 6), i think i've been getting more of a feel for him. they way he was speaking about the dalish and how they could never settle down, how they'd always be attacked... that made me feel sad.

and the end of this chapter, where they bring some of his feelings out. about meeting those guys. that has got to be... yeah, just the worst feeling.

the whole... relationship quadrangle, too. that's gonna be awkward. i like awkward! :)
Bloodsong 13T chapter 1 . 7/11/2012
i'm glad i pestered you for the link to this :)

just chapter one by itself is very inviting, i can feel this history between the characters, even though the main character is not present. but at the same time, i see there are a lot of loose ends, hints, and potentials going on that need to be addressed further in the story, and i look forward to them.
your writing style is very solid and engaging. it is a pleasure to read.

i do want to make one little comment on your intro notes... 'everything *after* ostagar' is strange to a dalish elf? man, being AT ostagar, dumped alone into the middle of the human army, the army of your enemies... that really did it to freak out my dalish elf right there. :)

i wish lhaine the best of luck. but so far, i do not see how he is going to achieve his desires. though those desires might change, and he might find happiness anyway. we shall see!
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