|Reviews for Two Faces of Kunieda|
| McLaren-HeeroWing chapter 11 . 9/13
Even though this is not perfect, I can abosolutely say that I LOVED THIS.
Five long years since this fanfic got updated for the last time, wow. Lots of things might have changed in your life…if you’re even alive (and I wish so). Whatever the case might be, since the Beelzebub manga ended (one of the scenarios you considered to finish your fic), I want to make my bet and ask you: If circumstances allow for it, would you finish your story?
Yes, I'm aware your fic is not perfect and that the dialogue is way too refined for the type of characters, among other possible flaws...but I can state with all certainty that this was the best Aoi x Oga and one of the best Beelzebub fics I have readen to date. Really liked your more mature and deep take on the story, getting us to see more bout the personal struggles, ideals (this one was interesting), evolution and flaws of the powerful characters we got to love, something the manga lacked even though it was supposed to be comedy based (even Gintama got emotional moments). I enjoyed your other works too.
So far, you have been one of the few authors that managed to hit that soft spot inside of me, the one that only really good and emotional stories manage to hit. It reminded me a lot of the time when Avatar TLAB ended back in 2008 and a teenage version of me got depressed for a full week after the ending. Leaving aside the differences, reading the last chapter and cancel notification at the end of the fic got a very similar effect on me. Yeah, maybe it was also a combination of external factors that contributed, but it's not the first time I read a sad fanfic while having hard times. Almost none got the same effect in me.
As an Aoi x Oga diehard shipper (a rare breed among the Beelzebub fandom), this short story was very staisfying in more than one way, even though there was no dating, no amusement parks, no confessions on the school roof, no kissing, etc. Their relationship felt a so natural, more adventurous, more and authentic to their characters than in other fics, even though they almost killed each other. They're thugs and fighters, after all. The evolution was on point. The back story of Ikaruga and Saotome was a great addition to it, showing very interesting parallelisms and a student (Kunieda), learning from the life mistakes of the master (Suiten). Even though it might be cliche, I hope Ikaruga only lost an arm when Oga shot her with that Zebul blast and that she greets the two ‘’love birds’’ with curses and insults while Saotome is treating her wounds (before heading to Oga and stop just in time before giving him a beating), haha.
Especially considering the bad rushed ending the manga had (as if it wasn’t enough with the anime), in the case you were able to finish it, many people were left wishing for more about Beelzebub. I agree with you, the story was worn out in the late chapters, the humour no longer worked, deep emotional moments were lacking, character development was close to non existant, etc. The short official spin off was miles ahead better, but even that was not enough to cover the many plot holes and unanswered questions. Reading good fanfiction helps people like me to palliate our dissatisfaction with certain stories, and so far, yours have been one of the best in that regard, even if it doesn’t attempt to finish the original story, such as yours.
Wether I’m alone or not in my petition, this follower of your work will be quite happy if you can finish this.
| Fredrickson the 96th chapter 10 . 5/7
Damn, I can see why this is M rated...
There really is some crazy dark shit going down here and it honestly just doesn't sit right in my stomach...
| stryboy chapter 9 . 5/10/2015
If you made jokes now you would MK-5 into MK-6
| ahsinam33 chapter 11 . 10/7/2013
I'm really sorry you had to discontinue this story. It was one of the best things I've ever read and honestly, you're an amazing writer; it's sad to know you won't be writing any more KuniedaXOga fics. But don't think I'm mad at you. Inspiration is very important when it comes to writing, especially fanfiction. So if you've lost interest in Beelzebub, then there's really nothing to do.
Thanks for posting this announcement though and I hope you fall in love with Beelzebub again. Not because I want you to finish this fic but simply because it's sad to fall out of love with something you used to love so much.
Bye then! I wish you the best.
| KiraranYaN chapter 11 . 9/14/2013
This was me. Just so you know. XD
| Understood chapter 11 . 9/14/2013
I think I know how you're feeling about not excitedly looking forward to the new chapters of Beelzebub Manga. On my side, I felt maybe, just a little, tired in reading the manga when the Return to the Old Ishiyama High Arc started. Well, it's for few reasons:
First, the quality of the manga changed a bit; and
Second, and most importantly, is that yes, it became too predictable.
For your stated reasons, I fully understand why you discontinued this story. Tell me about it. Commitments and schedules are also pulling my leg for far too long, and quite harsh too.
Though, maybe saying this to you won't change anything, but still I will continue to follow this story. I'll still hope you'll update this, even if it means for me to wait the manga reach its end.
Anyway, stay strong and remember that we, your loyal readers, are always here to support you, if ever you come back here or even you move out to other fanfic-social sites. :)
| Cochrane chapter 11 . 9/14/2013
My first instinct was "If this is another announcement posing as a chapter then I'll unwatch this story". Weird how that worked out…
Generally speaking, I'm sad to see this story go, but I can't help but agree with your reasons. Beelzebub hit its peak with the Akumano High arc. Everything since then was more or less inspired filler (Aiba being in my opinion less interesting filler), until we reached the current arc which is trying to be all epic again, and in my opinion failing. It just has a lot of punching, but misses out all the humor and character depth that was so great.
| Wink-blue chapter 11 . 9/13/2013
Hmmmmm... i knew this was gonna happen when you didn't published chapters on promised time... it was just two chappies left you said... you could have completed the story...
even though I didnt had any hopes from this fic... I feel little disapointed...
| DJ Blonde chapter 2 . 4/13/2013
I decided to read this despite my dislike for Aoi to see if I could be convinced otherwise. Your command of English is good but I found it impossible to get past chapter 2 because there was nothing at all to draw me in.
It reads like you are simply doing a long winded retelling of the events of the manga, which I have already read, and haven't added anything of significance. My opinion of fanfic is that it should add original material, otherwise why not just read the manga. Perhaps you do later on but I'm already too bored to continue. First rule of any writer is to engage your audience right from the start.
Avoid jumping around so much in POVs, much of it was unnecessary repetition of manga events. This is supposed to be about Aoi's 2 faces right? So why are you jumping to that boring scene with the old men at the school? Did that scene really add anything to the story? No.
You should spend most of the story exploring Aoi's feelings (but not just a brain dump of her thoughts which would be boring), creating situations with Oga with suspense and conflict to keep the reader engaged.
I'm sorry to sound harsh but it is a shame that a writer with obvious passion and good English skills would churn out something so boring. I suggest you look around for books and guides to help you develop compelling plots and scenes. That is your biggest weakness at the moment.
| Solid Snake17 chapter 1 . 3/14/2013
Hey man I want to start off by saying that I haven't read this story yet But i like your enthusiasm for writing and pleasing the readers of your work. Im just throwing it out there if you would like i can help you proof read the story and edit it (if im free XD). Im sure its not as bad as you think man, by the way hows the rewrite coming along? Well keep doing what you do best and good luck!
| ahsinam33 chapter 10 . 2/16/2013
Great story... you're really something. And to think that you're actually rewriting the story. That's got to be tiring but we all know it's worth it.
The analysis of Aoi's character is nice and it's like I'm getting to know her even better. So thanks for that.
But I believe that Oga's behavior in chapters 9 and 10 is a bit unrealistic. Well, maybe not unrealistic but it's not exactly canon. No matter how insecure he may feel, he wouldn't go that far. Using a Zebul blast on Aoi just isn't something I think he'd ever do even if her resistance and physical strength were enhanced by Black Techs. And the part where he mocked Aoi for not being able to cut into him didn't exactly seem like him. You're kind of unintentionally turning Oga into a bad person.
Chapter 10 was pretty dark but I enjoyed it. The only thing which bothered me was the part at the end. Oga stopped attacking Aoi after he saw her smiling but the way you put it didn't make it seem that he finally regained control of himself. It felt as though he was doing everything consciously and her smile just made him rethink his actions. If you wrote a few lines saying how seeing Aoi smile made him slowly come back to his senses I think it would make more sense. Also, Oga should feel shocked at his actions and not just be angry with himself since he couldn't control himself before and now he's suddenly registering what he had done.
I feel horrible for criticizing so much because you're such an awesome writer and this story is so amazing. But since you're doing a rewrite I thought I might give you my opinions. Please don't hate me for doing so.
Keep up the good work!
| shaid chapter 7 . 2/9/2013
Great work with the rewrite; I like it a lot. My memory of the original is a little hazy, but there's definitely a difference in the presentation of Aoi's mental state that I really enjoy. Really. Wonderful job.
Thank you so much for sharing and for letting me know when you've completed rewrites. Good luck and, again, thank you!
| tsbkii chapter 10 . 12/29/2012
I just realized that this entire chapter was 20 pages long... O_o
Back-to-back, this would be about 10 pages long...
*sighs* No matter how much effort I put into my stories, I can never make them as long as that... They're so painfully short... TT_TT
My longest fanfic was only 3,254 words long... Crap...
How do you manage to make your stories this long?
| Crayola Hearts chapter 7 . 10/25/2012
While the story is rather interesting, the continuous references to charactization and the story itself are making me lose interest. Instead of constantly spelling it out for us by saying that Oga is this and Aoi is that, develop the characters; it may just be my over-thinking, but it seems like you simply took the characters without much development and threw them in with a long windy explanation of their personalities.
Your syntax is good as is your extensive vocabulary, but I feel as if you are going overboard. Take into mind of their characters; Oga is an idiotic simpleton who loves to beat the living hell out of people, Ikaruga is basically a thug, and Aoi is just a high-school girl (and delinquent) - when making the dialogue, you should take this into consideration by lessening the use of higher level vocabulary and making the words more suited to their character.
Other than that, you have a way with creating descriptions and portraying feelings that make me feel just as the characters do, which is good; I've always seen it as a compliment when someone emotionally reacts to my work. Just pay more attention to the characters; the more realistically and close to canon you portray the character, the better the story will be.
Don't feel discouraged by this review I rarely take time to review something in this fashion unless I see potential.
| keiko-uchiha chapter 10 . 9/28/2012
I definitely enjoyed reading this story.