|Reviews for War in Tokyo|
| K0tar chapter 2 . 2/11/2012
really good.i can kind of see where a few problems are. like the food situation. this is going to really limit just how long the conflict can last, since once the food runs out, the humans will be forced to surrender or do something utterly insane in order to get that dome down.
another thing that i noticed was the power supply. where are they getting it from? does the power still go through the powerlines despite the dome or do they have portable power generators?
otherwise it's just a problem with balancing out characters. i'm not familiar with the dragon so i have no idea if he's been underpowered or overpowered right now. right now i think the power levels is ranma and company is first, the dragon second, and the sailor scouts third, and i'm not sure where full metal panic is right now, seeing as they haven't had a lot of action yet (hopefully we'll get to see some mechs stomping around next time)...of course, this is mere speculation and i'm a little biased because i haven't actually watched/read Sailor moon since i was a kid (like, kindergarten years). i've read ranma more recently though. but since ranma one hit a dark general in less than a second? yeah, i feel that ranma and co. are the most powerful in the area right now. another thing to consider is that ranma is really the only one of the three main fighters of the nerima wrecking crew (Ranma, Mousse, and Ryoga) to actually be there, the nerima fighting crew's fighting ability has been reduced drastically (Tsoun, and Genma don't fight, the Old Ghoul probably won't do much aside from defend the home base, and...i just realized, where is Mousse? i can't remember if he's there but dead or injured since i haven't heard much of him in this).
sorry if this review was just a little bit more wordy than i intended but i felt i needed to ask these things since my curiosity got the better of me and i intend to review each of your chapters when they come out.
| MissGardenia chapter 2 . 2/11/2012
Yeah, I'm appreciating what you're writing, but I also see how you can find issues continuing. The issue with multicrossovers in a story with a fair amount of combat is figuring out power levels and how to keep things interesting/balanced. For example, given this is a late series Ranma who is being taken at face value as really powerful, how to keep other people relevant.
Also, the Michigan State Militia kind of stick out in a not necessarily good way.
| Jerry Unipeg chapter 2 . 2/11/2012
GREAT CHAPTER! (*x4) You are doing great in each team.
| ttripled chapter 2 . 2/11/2012
Awesome story, well told. Keep up the great work and thanks for sharing!
| Wonderbee31 chapter 2 . 2/11/2012
It looks like Ranma is not going to show any mercy to the Monsters, and the Dark Generals would be smart to be wary if they run into him soon, and will be looking forward to what happens when he meets some of the other folk involved in defense of the City, as well as what might happen if the Generals gain all the power they feel is needed.
| Rune Tobor chapter 2 . 2/11/2012
Well its a good update. Nice long chapter too, but you say its hard to continue? Log out and post any outline you have as a review and others can give suggestions. One idea I have is that Ranma and a few others should invade the dark kingdom to both rescue any they can and kill the queen. With her death the dark kingdom will fall apart and the dark generals might even fight each other. Ami should be able to figure out how to make a portal to the dark kingdom. Thanks for the fic.
| Rexnos chapter 2 . 2/11/2012
It's kind of a sprawling story. I'm not surprised you're having issues with it. You're using at least four different sources for your characters and, being you, you're doing your damnedest to keep them in character. That's on top of balancing power levels, keeping up the tension and preparing for future plot points.
In any case, it's been pretty interesting so far. I liked the first chapter a bit more as there was more action, but I feel like you're slowly setting the scene for a big fight. I liked Ranma's response to the situation and Cologne's direct acquittal of her abilities. Jupiter's fight had some pretty interesting descriptions as well. It's always interesting to read about people who just like to fight.
I'm feeling like the dark generals are going to end up underpowered. Considering that they're the only seriously powerful bad guys and that several of the good guys can one v one them, I'm feeling the climactic confrontations are going to be a bit of anti-climax. The generals will be able to take out peons with ease, but Ranma, the dragon, Cologne, the sailors and a few other characters will roflstomp them. Still, I suppose that can be fun to read too.
Anyway, great stuff. Keep it up once you've got it all worked out.
| Zealot of Reading chapter 2 . 2/11/2012
Great chapter, hope to see more updates soon!
| SuperiorShortness chapter 2 . 2/11/2012
Hope you think about some new material soon.
| bakapervert chapter 2 . 2/11/2012
Thanks for the update.
| Y.Rako chapter 2 . 2/11/2012
| karthik9 chapter 2 . 2/10/2012
it is excellent chapter i look forward to future updates
| lordamnesia chapter 2 . 2/10/2012
Utterly incredible! This keeps up the awesomeness from the first chapter, and develops it further, in such a way that I expect to see a bigger confrontation in the next chapter, or rather that's what appears to be building up. Keep up the super-awesome-mega-cool work!
| SuperiorShortness chapter 1 . 2/6/2012
Fun stuff. All your plots are always so originally glorious...
| Sora with an S chapter 1 . 1/27/2012
Science beats magic any day, as the wielders of science know roughly what they are doing. Go the military! Kill those things!