|Reviews for Kingdom Hearts: Point of War|
| forevermagik13 chapter 43 . 1/2/2013
I'm glad I've been able to help you in the improving of your grades! I'm really quite flattered.
It's been a pleasure to follow you through this. You've had your rough moments, but you're really pulling it together! Now if only I can review more frequently... I'm going to make an effort!
I'll catch you at the next story!
| forevermagik13 chapter 42 . 1/2/2013
This was a generally well-done chapter. My only complaint was the bit with Squall, Ansem and Graros. I felt that Squall got a little too mad too quickly. But, perhaps that's just me.
Aside from that, I really enjoyed the chapter!
I don't like Graros. Plain and simple.
I really appreciated all the happy moments between different trios. Though, I'm sad that Xion won't be coming back. But, as I know you said, she wouldn't be. I understand why you ship Rokunami, they were together for 7 years. It makes sense. I feel like Roxas would have called Xion "she" from the beginning though, and wouldn't even have mentioned "it." In that situation, Axel or Namine would have been more likely to refer to Xion as "it" rather than "she". But, anyway...
I also had to laugh at Riku and Becca. I'm assuming they'll end up together in the future? Probably. Just my prediction.
Anyway, one more chapter and I've finished this story! It's been quite a ride!
| forevermagik13 chapter 41 . 1/2/2013
This might just me being picky... but I feel you bring attention to Liam not being ordinary. "If he were anyone else, this would happen, but he's special so it doesn't." You mentioned it once or twice towards the end of the last chapter and again with his battle with Eclipse. It just... feels awkward... like you're trying to overcompensate and really *tell* us that Liam's special as opposed to *showing* us.
Ugh... I hope Riku's going to be okay!
Where did Ray's grandfather send Braig? Are they all at the Memory Skyscraper?
7 years? That's quite the time change! I mean, I get it. Part of the reason why I ended Betwixt and Between where I did is because I needed to have time pass differently.
Anyway, I'm gonna have to take a break from reading for a tad, but I hope to get back soon!
| forevermagik13 chapter 40 . 1/2/2013
Ugh, it rather disgusts me that I stopped reading this with so little left to go. However... as I'm sure you can sympathize with... life happened and free time is little!
I greatly appreciate all of your reviews on my story! They made me really happy :) (I will actually probably respond to each individual thing on my blog (when I get around to posting-which I hope to be soon).) Anyway, now it's time for me to return the favor and start reviewing your story again :)
At first, I had to wonder why Terra using magic was a bad thing, then I realized it was because the magic Terra is best at happens to be dark magic, which is why everyone's like "NO! Don't do that!"
Also, little syntactical thing (wouldn't be a review from me if there wasn't one...) "Alongside" is one word.
Riku! *squees* Sorry, I feel honestly so much better for the battle now that Riku's shown up!
Well, had I been reading these as they came out, I'd have to complain at you for leaving us like that... but... I can just hit "next" and read the next chapter. And I will do just that shortly!
| KumoFuzei chapter 43 . 9/16/2012
A really nice chapter, albeit short. It really felt like the ending to a KH game _
A really nice ending note, I really hope you know that your work is appreciated and is enjoyable and I hope others uncover it _
| KumoFuzei chapter 42 . 9/16/2012
Just far plainer.
Far more plain*?
"Who are you?" Are rather menacing voice asked.
and few to the surface
Wowee, what a chapter. Truly great, it did deepen the characters a little more, as any good story should and if you look all the way back to the start you can see the massive character development to be very self evident in this chapter. I can't wait to see the change over time _
| KumoFuzei chapter 41 . 9/16/2012
When ever they clash they create chaos
throwing of his Chakrams
manically around the crash side.
maniacally around the crash site*
he and Tifa leapt of his bike and let it crash into the enemy.
Liam tried to through up a shield
Thank fully, Kairi had already been air lifted out, and now sat patiently in the gummi ship.
to exhausted to even raise their blades.
that had appeared a long side Riku.
Roxas said, noticing everything thing.
Noticing everything*? Noticing what everyone was thinking*?
Brilliant chapter, I did like all the questions it raised. Like what was going to happen to Liam, how were they going to get out alive. Who was the woman? And it makes me want to read on but to be honest, your author note at the end is the real hook :P
| KumoFuzei chapter 40 . 9/16/2012
, he grabbed hold of the soldiers, and grabbed hold of them.
Ermm, you kind of repeated yourself here _
, when his best was when he was synch blading.
he was at his best*?
darkness shot its war from his hand
Obviously surrounded by many knights and soldiers who chose fit not to join this fight.
who had chosen not to join in with this fight*?
Liam ran forward, his burning key blade no also covered in darkness.
When Sora noticed her was only just on his feet.
noticed it, he was*
incoming* I think.
newcomer* I think.
Okay, now onto my views on the chapter, aha.
I loved how ven, terra and aqua fought, you have progressed so much in the story telling within your battles and it really shows in this section. Your attempt to create emotion was very well crafted and it kept me reading without even thinking. Riku, Verrat and Becca's entrance was both kickass and funny, very nice job. And the ending paragraph involving Kairi and Liam was brilliant, it's made me want to read on.
| forevermagik13 chapter 39 . 9/8/2012
Ugh, I realize I said Eclipse in my last review in reference to Kairi. It's Solaris, isn't it? Yeah... anyway... does he know?
Also, you'll want to be consistent with capitalizing Organization. I mean, Organisation. (you spell it with the s.)
Given Keyblade lore, how, exactly, does Roxas plan on getting Namine a Keyblade?
Yuffie's weapon is called a shuriken, just so you know :)
Hmm... are we close to the end? Battles like these generally go towards the end?
*curses not having anymore time to read at the moment*
| forevermagik13 chapter 38 . 9/8/2012
Does Eclipse know that Kairi wasn't absorbed like the other princesses?
And... if Becca's back in the Realm of Light, where are Riku and Verrat?
Also, shouldn't Becca recognize Ray?
They were a thing... she should recognize him!
| forevermagik13 chapter 37 . 9/8/2012
*Wants to know what goes on next*
| forevermagik13 chapter 36 . 9/3/2012
Nice parallel with falling and waking up. Deep.
It just occurred to me that the Princesses are dead. Ouch. Right in the feels.
What's going on with Riku? I don't like this.
Hmm... it hasn't even occurred to me that my Terra might be able to form corridors. I probably won't explore that option though, given how long it's been since the end of AtP.
So confused with Fallan and stuff. But I'm sure I'll piece it together in later chapters. And I'm choosing to ignore a potential spoiler.
| forevermagik13 chapter 35 . 9/3/2012
Okay, just a few simple critiques:
Try and avoid definitive saying statements like "They all were heading to their deaths." Or "They all knew they were heading to their deaths." Obviously, none of them actually died in that battle, and the reader knows that. It messes with the flow of the story when you give definitive statements like that. You can say something like "They all had a sense that this could be the end." or "Even though this could be the end, they continued on anyway." And such. The characters don't know if they're going to die or not in these situations, so you should avoid narration that indicates so.
My second critique was that you technically didn't say when they encountered the Soldiers of Pure Light. One moment, they were meeting Ray's grandfather, the next, he was slamming through Soldiers easily.
Um, and that was it. I don't actually have a complaint with time travel. Just, do it well and good luck.
| forevermagik13 chapter 34 . 9/3/2012
Unsurprisingly, Sora is pissed. Why, exactly, are him and Liam fighting so much?
Yay Ven! and you're Light stuff.
They're going for TWTNW... great...
What does Sora mean by that last line?
| KumoFuzei chapter 39 . 9/3/2012
Mistakes: ""So what are we early?" Sora asked as he limped towards them. No one was happy with him being there as he could hardly walk. But Sora was far to stubborn" "So what, are we early?" Sora asked as he limped towards them. No one was happy with him being there as he could hardly walk. But Sora was far too stubborn*
"would be heared." heard*
"Dilan and Aeleus obvious worked well" obviously*
"before a icicle shot out the ground, impaling such knight through the face" before an icicle shot out of the ground and impaled a knight through the face*
"Some how, the hit the ground safely," Somehow they hit the ground safely,*
"I miss out time together Liam." our*
Amazing action packed chapter, I didn't see any of it coming, really well written and enjoyable. Thoroughly want to read on now :3