|Reviews for Broken Chains|
| Namikaze Uzumaki Potter chapter 38 . 7/16
Loved it. It was awesome.
| akasanta chapter 38 . 7/8
Awesome story! Now on to "The Stars Alone". :D
| Lerris chapter 25 . 7/3
I originally didn't read far into this story since it was just too dark. That being said, I kept seeing it, and your writing makes it worth another look, so I just skipped over the first few chapters.
With regard to this chapter, from an engineering point of view, I would ditch the solar panel tech and just focus on the super battery. Get that patented to infinity and beyond and then throw all your money at producing and selling it. Done right you could likely become one of the richest men on Earth, if you could just solve the problem cleanly. The other things could probably wait, so you minimize the risk of it all being stolen at once. Beyond that, just getting a plant up to produce those unique batteries is likely to be extremely expensive. Also, 100% efficiency is unlikely to ever occur. Perhaps 85% might be more realistic.
I think if I was focused on developing tech as fast as possible, I'd team with various ethical companies to develop parts. That way you don't have to get bogged down with any one part, beyond writing enough detail to reproduce it.
Overall though, so far the writing is good. I don't particularly care for dark stories, but your writing is enough to make up for it. I suppose I do have one suggestion, perhaps you can make sure very early on that it is obvious that Harry is still fighting? I don't recall it from my previous attempt at this story.
| Oddballzebra chapter 23 . 6/15
Ok, I'm done. This story started off well but now its just too fucking stupid. Dropped.
| Oddballzebra chapter 22 . 6/15
What the hell is this? I highly doubt he would sit back and just let Luna run her mouth like that. How the hell does she even know all of this anyway? You wanted to make her a seer and that's fine, but you've basically made her omniscient just to be more convenient for the plot. Why couldn't you just make an actual dark Harry fic?
| Oddballzebra chapter 18 . 6/15
Oh god, not a jedi.
| Oddballzebra chapter 16 . 6/14
You said he only learned the offensive side of the force. Is he ever going to learn the other aspects of the force?
| Oddballzebra chapter 11 . 6/14
I'm confused. I thought this was supposed to be a dark Harry fic, yet you keep hinting that he's going to be 'redeemed' somehow and become good again.
| Oddballzebra chapter 4 . 6/14
Bullshit, there is no way Harry would be able to beat a sith in a battle of wills like that.
| Oddballzebra chapter 3 . 6/14
A sex bond? Are you kidding me?
| Oddballzebra chapter 2 . 6/14
If he's a sith lord then shouldn't he have yellow or orange eyes?
| Fast Frank chapter 19 . 6/11
Base thirteen, eh? It's consistent with JKR's thing for prime numbers.
| RFTL80 chapter 23 . 6/2
Xeno was always batshit crazy, but you took it to a whole different level. Fracking brilliant! Loved it.
| Aria DeLoncray chapter 38 . 5/29
| DeathCrawler chapter 32 . 5/24
damn tonks making her a killer that really sucks