|Reviews for Masquerade|
| mirandamainguym chapter 28 . 9/1
Beautifully written Bmah & sistersgrimmlover! I truly thank you from the bottom of my heart for continuing this story. This is my second time reading this story because I love it so much. Your dedication is admirable. XoXo
| xcxlilxcx chapter 28 . 8/23
Your story is so amazing! Can you put in more about the ministry? Can you also do more about why Ariana has the magic of Ariana Dumbledor? I really want you to update this story because it is so amazing and has so much potential! Keep being the amazing writer that you are
| Bianca Di Angelo 0 chapter 1 . 8/16
Nice job using the The Lorax, not sure of the spelling of that, on chapter 19.
| Faery66 chapter 28 . 7/21
Hope to read more soon.
| Briarvine chapter 28 . 7/19
I love this story and I absolutely love Hamilton but they do not go together. This chapter could've been better (not saying it was bad or anything) if it didn't have so many Hamilton references. I wanna see where this story goes though but please less Hamilton :P I was reading this and I just kept getting distracted from the story everytime Hamilton came up.
| Kavi chapter 28 . 7/4
Your story is addictive and wonderful. I understand that ur busy in college but i would really appreciate it if u posted a new chapter. Pls pls update. Thank you.
| Guest chapter 9 . 7/3
As much as I love Bella and Tom... she's an absolute bitch, she makes others suffer for he fucking wrong doings... what's the difference between her and dumbledore? Though I like the all the relationships, friends, lovers etc. Still Bella is whiny, sometimes childish and stupid bitch.
But I still can't hate her much, and I love your story.
| Sorry so good though chapter 28 . 6/16
I love how this story is panning out, it so good, you are such a fantastic and creative writer. I've grown to appreciate and like nearly every character in this fic, even ones I don't usually like such as Hermione and to a lesser extent Draco. (I know I'm a huge minority here )I read the first story of this series and it was brilliant, i have to say masquerade is incredible, but I feel like one aspect that made me love inside my mind hasn't transferred over as well as the others. The writing is still great, better even, but I think where inside my mind really shined was in the characters interactions with one another. What I mean by that is, the main characters who I perceive to be Bella and Tom as leads, with Draco, Hermione, and Blaise falling close behind don't feel as present or even as significant as they previously did. It seems in masquerade, at least for the past while, that Bella and Ariana are sort of taking the show. I like both of them, but this story got here on characters the plot seems to be moving away from, for no in apparent reason. If I recall correctly I'm reasonably certain one or two of our main cast didn't even appear, for maybe even one or two consecutive chapters. Which is fine in a sense, though you have immensely large chapters it's ok to forget a character for a little. But for me personally, because though I doubt it, I could be the only one getting this feeling that some people are just, missing. Like for instances when I'm reading it's still very good, but occasionally it jumps out me, questions like where's Blaise? Or hows Voldemort going to counter Bella's latest action? I also miss the interactions between characters, I understand that the first one was set primarily in Hogwarts so all the characters had little choice but to congregate, but in masquerade it seems to me almost like they never talk. (I know they do, but that's just how it feels) For being the second character listed I also believe Tom in specific should prehaps have more time, because as one of the two main characters he feels strangly, almost awkwardly absent. I don't necessarily mean he should have more scenes with Bella, even just Voldemort with his death eaters or growing his magical power alone would do a nice job to really reconnect us and the story with him. On the matter of power, though I understand the fic's hero is Bella, it appears in most fics as though only the protagonist has any care about self improvement. Too me at least it seems as though she is growing leaps and bounds every chapter while literally everyone else is for some odd reason without a care. Voldemort, Grindelwald, and Dumbledore in particular should be extremely interested in increasing their own power at this point, as sane people they know they have to stay cough up with the leader of an opposing faction, and they don't appear to be at all interested in this. Even Voldemort the most power hungry guy around just seems to accept that Bella can just learn and grow while he sits around doing presumably something, but nothing that affects anything apparently. I don't think you intended for Bella to have the only tangible development in terms of power, but as I see it now, she's got everyone in the bag and though the story reminds us she doesn't, we never actually see any evidence of anyone really rivaling her incredible progression, and for no clear reason these three characters have to be freaked out by this. Before Grindelwald Dumbledore and Voldemort all created a balance of sort, no one could effectively kill the other (with Tom and maybe Dumbledore at a slight advantage?) But with Bella the up and rising, we don't see them rationally responding to this change, or try to get better and work around it. I'm done with that train now onto my final critique, I believe the story is too wide at this point, too many people who don't seem to matter consuming too much time that doesn't seem to affect the main plot. Its interesting to get into romilda vains head, but it's not worth it to me when it costs the characters who don't appear as much but who are actually much more important time on screen (page I guess). It's just extended so far that it's beginning to reach out in ways that don't help the plot, but just create interesting but ultimately inconsequential sub plots relative to what could be. I'm really sorry, I actually feel kinda bad for this because I honestly enjoy this story so much. There's so many things I could praise and I know this doesn't convey that well, my criticism is meant to highlight problem I think prevent this very good story from joining it's first installment as one of my favorite fic's. It's only my oppion, and though I hope you consider them, I don't expect my views to instantly alter your plans. It's your story and I'm confident I will enjoy it regardless. Good job
| Guest chapter 28 . 5/28
Hi Hi. Hope his finds you well. Just wondering if you will be updating anytime soon?
I've reread the whole of masquerade and hope you'll take pity and update soon!
| Bepo1401 chapter 19 . 4/18
I got a bad feeling that Ariana is the one who got killed off in that premonition
| harlequin320 chapter 28 . 3/31
well, well, well, another fascinating chapter, love how Bella's and Ariana's relationship continues to develop, and how it has created a delicate balance with her siblings, it is a matter of time before something has to give, and I wonder what that will be and how it will change everything, also, it seems Ariana seemed to solidify her relationship/team-up with Romilda and Co., can't wait to see her introduce them to Bella properly, next, Hermione and Blaise, quite the interesting twist with the two of them, on one hand Hermione is now pursuing the creation of a horcrux to become immortal, on the other hand Blaise is a mess, Apollo seems to be pushing Blaise to accept him further (Blaise is the only one that hasn't fully accepted his horseman spirit at this point? right?) and this is causing the plague to start killing him again, and finally Sirius is Command, lol, so ironic, you really have woven quite the web here, and oh do I love it sooo much, so to sign off ... great chapter, keep up the good work
| Happy.Death.Executioner chapter 28 . 3/9
This shall be very interesting, I wonder if in the elite, some of them are Bella's people, more please
| xxqueenofbookjunglexx chapter 28 . 2/22
| Tempduloupe chapter 28 . 2/20
MAAArvelous! Update soon please!
| lordvoldemort666 chapter 28 . 2/18
One note: While I also ADORE Hamilton, you use it often enough where it detracts from the telling of the story. I often get distracted because I notice similarities between the two. Just a thought to perhaps tone it down a bit? Other than that, it's as brilliant as ever.