|Reviews for Mystery Man|
| Saia-chan chapter 35 . 10/13/2013
I must admit that, at first, your warnings about veela!Draco and Draco/Herm had put me off, put then someone recommended your story and I thought I'd give it a try. And I'm glad I did. ;)
I should have been doing plenty of things last week, but somehow I spent up a lot of time reading Mystery Man and when I saw that only 2 persons had left reviews for the last chapter I got confused. /
Thus, here you go!
Your average chapter length is awesome and I like the balance between descriptions, actions and dialogues a lot. It's not too much of either and makes it easy to picture the scene and read everything fluently.
I also like how you include the wizarding World as a whole into the story and don't just stop at Hogwarts and/or London. I think the part where you showed the negotiations with the giants was my most favourite in the entire story so far, mostly because it imbedded nicely into the canon storyline too, even when you are aiming towards changing it. Does that sound strange? Probably.. heh.
It's gained a lot during the last ten chapters too. At first I was a little put off with how much stuff of the Wizarding World had been influenced or accomplished by Ed because it summed up to: everything except Voldemort's defeat. Nobody has survived an encounter with faeries, but Ed has; nobody can talk Giantish(?), Ed can, even made a contract with them, twice; nobody can handle Stealclaw or Griffons, Ed can; he helped with Grindelwald; he invented the Whomping Willow; got the resurrection stone; etc. A tad too much for my personal liking, even though you managed to find reasonable explanations to everything so far.
And now, with Ed having amnesia and a strong opponent, it's way better! Like the powers got balanced out and I really, really like that twist. (I feel a little sorry for Voldemort though. XD)
As for the Veela!Draco and Draco/Herm parts, I'm still not completely sure how I am feeling about them. You managed to lay down the change in atmosphere from Hermione's pov elaboratedly, but you somehow missed up on Draco's side. He's part-Veela, I get it, but maybe you could include a sequence where he reflects on her on a deeper level than this? So that the readers can see if it's just his Veela-genes doing the change or if he actually starts to like Hermione for real. He wasn't quite sure about it last time you wrote him in the library, he only liked her smell and felt calm, as far as I remember, and I interpreted that as his heritage's doing.
I would love it because it would help me to get used to the idea and understand the character you gave him a little better.
I'm also wondering just when Draco will realize that a) he told Ed that his wand is porbably still at the prison and that b) Ed told him they would go and get said wand and c) he agreed to accompany him. Summing up in: He agreed to visit Azkaban without being able to summon a corporeal Patronus (as far as I know). XD His face would be priceless.
Or Ed will realize that they don't know where the prison is and that one person who might know is Sirius Black and that he just missed out on having Harry take him to 'Serious'. XD Another (albeit slightly less) priceless face.
But maybe Fudge was too interested in Ed's wand and they actually have to visit him. (god, the poor guy) Ed mentioned something about having memories of the current minister. He would even top Draco's face.
Argh, too many possibilities. D:
Oh and you wrote that you want to think of new ideas! Hmm...
You could include Charlie or the Dragonites again. I really liked that idea and then they were to meet but Ed had lost his memories, so there should be some possibilities.
Or the lake/sea near Hogwarts, you seem to like magical creatures and there are some inside that could take part in...whatever you have planned. Dumbledore knew Mermish so (if he learned it whilst still attending Hogwarts as a student) Ed might too. Or not, if Dumbledore learned it as a professor.
Or a Squib, there aren't that many in the original so you can let your fantasy roam.
Or a completely new acquantaince, 'cause you've had old acquaintances and original chars quite a lot. (A little like the Dragonite group, just that we see how Ed meets them.)
Or you find a use for the meteorite belt and the sword/guards that Ed might find again sometime. Together with his wand, probably.
Or... well, I'm out of ideas. ._.'
Hope some of them can help...
Soooo...what else? As for the last chapter in particular, I liked what you did with Umbridge and how Ed said she's nothing to him. True, especially since he can't even remember her. Hahah! XD
The names for the creatures are also very nice, all of them.
Or the twist that Pearl only communicates with the wind or the flute, I totally love it everytime she does. It's one thing to write a dialogue with words, but it's so much more impressive, when someone can communicate without them. Shows the bond between them more clearly.
You also manage to write well without a beta and right now I can't remember any typos in the last chapters at all!
I just hope I didn't miss anything...
Well, I'm looking forward to where you are gonig with this. The meaning of Ed's tattoo and the 'Master' and what actions Voldemort might take and so on. Not to mention how many more times Ed needs to practically die to regain his memories. (It's impressive that he still mounts his friends when he rarely ever lands safe and sound. How many times has he crashed down already? XD)
So, keep up the good work and please update. I'm looking forward to it! :)
| Guest chapter 35 . 8/19/2013
Argh! I need to know what happens! Please continue soon!
| Yumi chapter 25 . 8/17/2013
I Love it. But then again, he's been with willy for so long and all it's kinda sad.. I mean as himself with all zee memories
| DoctorWhotaliaandtheOlympians chapter 35 . 7/27/2013
| Mcat9905 chapter 35 . 7/24/2013
once again, glad to see the story progressing. still interested in where youre going with these antagonists and eds memories and the fairies and all that shtuff, but for now i'm just pleased with how it's all been turning out. Hope life treats you well!
| DreamweaverAki chapter 34 . 6/12/2013
L-O-V-E LOVE it! Please update soon! Will Ed ever get his memories back? Where is he going now? Wouldn't it have been a better idea, for Harry's safety and Ed' memory, to have Harry give or show Ed the book he gave him? I really like the whole idea of this story! Please keep going!
| ReenaKanda chapter 13 . 5/28/2013
About the Eragon thing. I noticed they also cut out all the training with Brom as well as not following the whole plot. Percy Jackson is the same way honestly. I really like the story as well. If you ever want to discontinue it I will gladly adopt it.
| ReenaKanda chapter 3 . 5/26/2013
Do you still not have a beta-reader?
| PriestessofBast chapter 16 . 5/11/2013
love the song! celtic women rock! i saw them live once it was so awesome love the fairies are they going to play a big part? and im very curious as to what is in the boxed got cant wait till ed formally meets hagrid ed is friends with so many interesting creatures that hagrid would love to meet i think theyll hav lots in common with one another keep up the good work!
| Mcat9905 chapter 34 . 5/10/2013
You should definitely show what we never saw, your writing is awesome enough to pull it off. Draco was surprised because the hippogriff probably bowed in return and then completely shoved him off or something like that. See another chapter soon!? :)
| Mashy-Gaara4life chapter 34 . 5/10/2013
Draco is surprised...bcoz of...Ed suddenly fainted? Weird foreign person coming? The hippogryphs suddenly mating?
They used nothing at all?
What is it?
| DoctorWhotaliaandtheOlympians chapter 34 . 5/10/2013
| Reishin Amara chapter 34 . 5/10/2013
Of course Harry is gonna be a fucking retard and nothing changes...as usual...Im starting to think Ed is in there simply more for plot expansion and humor.
| Mcat9905 chapter 33 . 5/10/2013
AAAH OHMYGOSH I always love your chapters so much! How did you write grawp's language so well? And then Ed flipped if hermione! Like what? Keep up the quick updates!
| DoctorWhotaliaandtheOlympians chapter 33 . 5/9/2013
Oh dear... This is getting really good. :) Great chapter!