|Reviews for Burnt Around the Edges|
| ScipioPB chapter 1 . 8/13/2014
This is really good! I wish you'd finish it :)
| Poke-Polished chapter 1 . 6/23/2013
From this introductory I could tell you write very well! You captured the story perfectly. I wonder why you didn't continue the story. I would love to read more. This fandom hasn't died out yet! We just need to get back into the swing of things.
| empressenoshima chapter 1 . 7/19/2012
This si really great! You should continue it
| JMeh chapter 1 . 6/25/2012
Ooouuuu... I did enjoy reading this.
I love your writing style and i cant wait for u to tackle a MollyxChase fic. There so cute...
Cant wait for more. *u*
| iChocoLove chapter 1 . 4/3/2012
LOL CHASE IS SUCH AN ASS
I love your writing by the way! I can't wait for future chapters 8D
| Inuhana chapter 1 . 3/21/2012
Whoo-hoo! I loved this story it was almost like mental video whe I read it! Please write this story! I will love you if you do that! ;D
| Eve1156 chapter 1 . 2/4/2012
I kinda like the way you started out, but I feel like there's just too much unnecessary information and not enough story. You try to make your characters realistic, and then add too much, which (for me) was a little bit of a turn off. Also, you were sometimes repetitive. I suggest that after you finish writing, get someone else to read it for you to see if there are any repetitions or clutter. Sometimes there are phrases, sentences, or even paragraphs where you can just cut out to make the piece more crisp and concise. Another thing. For a first chapter, it didn't exactly have a "hook" or anything of that sort.
Sorry to give you such a negative review, but I do hope this is constructive criticism! If I offended you in any way, I'm really sorry.
| Dreamicide chapter 1 . 1/29/2012
ahhh this is interesting so far! :D i don't know much of harvest moon canon, but it's nothing that a trip to the wikia can't fix, and even them it's easy to follow what's going on. the characters are all really cute, and as always your writing is wonderful. x33 looking forward to reading more!
| missbabblingbrook21 chapter 1 . 1/27/2012
Hahaha just imagine Chase has zero hearts hahahah, I like it your very discriptive and detailed in your writing please update soon!
| Yoru no Angel chapter 1 . 1/26/2012
This story is off to a good start :) you have a nice writing style and I enjoyed Molly's interactions with Finn, Mayor Hamilton and Kathy. It's also refreshing to hear that Molly won't instantly fall in love with Chase.
I look forward to reading the next chapter!
| Charlyatt chapter 1 . 1/24/2012
Hiya, and welcome to the budding HM fandom :D
I do have to say, you're off to a strong start with your story. I'm interested to see how this turns out, and I'm glad I clicked on this! I'm really glad you are saying you won't rush the romance right out of the gate either ;p That is the number one pitfall with HM fics, a good chunk just dump all the fluff out all at once and expect the connection to be there when in reality it just seems all forced, contrived, and empty. Don't let other people sway you into speeding things up either - though you look like a seasoned writer, so I think you'll be able to avoid that tendency :p
I think the only thing I noticed was that you DO have a tendency to start a lot of paragraphs off with dialogue. While this isn't really anything major (I didn't notice until I glanced back over after reading and noticed how many lines started with "), variety is the spice of life. Just make sure to keep an eye on how many lines in a row you start with dialogue! It's not anything MAJOR that ruins the writing or anything, but it's one of those small things that turns good writing into better writing.
Good luck, and I hope to see more chapters!
| etherealvalen chapter 1 . 1/24/2012
Your writing style is very captivating. I can't complain. Please continue this wonderful story :)
| mosherocks4 chapter 1 . 1/24/2012
O: oh my gosh! I'm loving this so much already! Please update soon! I can't wait to see how this'll turn out! :D
| MorWolfMor chapter 1 . 1/24/2012
Ooh, this is good so far :) I can't wait to see where it goes 0 good job :)