|Reviews for Redefining the Gyre|
| Anon chapter 2 . 8/2/2013
"Finally catching him by the shirt collar and towing him in like a prized river bass."
O_O / :O **splutters and dies**
| saena88 chapter 2 . 3/3/2012
This is.. ugh… A walking and talking thesaurus shouldn’t have this much trouble coming up with words that define your greatness as a writer…
Geeze on crackers… How you create the world of Daryl is beyond me; it’s like you are him… You are true to your title as a muse…
How one scar can harbor so much emotion and experience… How the divulgence of its foul and aggressive existence can give birth to what is truly beautiful like trust, friendship and possibly love…
| Jenn chapter 2 . 2/5/2012
I like the little details you put into this, the understanding without words between Daryl and Carol. And the idea for what might've happened to Glenn before they met.
Creepy and easy to believe in what it would be like to be lost in the middle of madness like that. Great job :)
| Laurie220 chapter 2 . 1/26/2012
awwww i loved it, this was perfect, i really think you should do more and see if Daryl ever makes the move :D i think you have a great start for their friendship and eventually more ;) if i say pretty please will you write more pleeeeeeeaaaaasssseeee
| ResistPsychicDeath chapter 1 . 1/26/2012
This ia really awesome! Keep writing!
| doctorkaitlyn chapter 2 . 1/26/2012
First off, I'm sorry I didn't get to review the first chapter; I've kind of been reading stories in between classes for the last week. xD But here I am, reviewing now! I'm really glad that you decided to write this piece; I'm a huge fan (for some reason) of stories that revolve around Daryl's scars but this is even more wonderful because of the fact that it's really about Glenn.
I really love the pasts you create for every character you write. They're all different but they all fit into the fandom so perfectly, if that makes sense.
I absolutely love how you ended this, with that little promise that there will be a future. I think that was just wonderful, like everything you write. :D I can't wait to see what you write next!
| Equal-Opportunity-Reader chapter 2 . 1/25/2012
"Turns out the people that hit me probably knew they were had the right idea at any rate" Not so sure about "were had" here?
God! Just makes me want to hug Glenn till he squeals. I really like the way you've categorized Rick in this. I don't have much liking for his do gooder, selfless hero stuff, it's shoved in your face every episode, almost. I lol'd at the mudfight scene! I really want to see something like that on the show now.
| willfollow chapter 1 . 1/24/2012
This is really good! I like how Daryl does so much thinking and reflecting but says next to nothing since that is how I read the show's character. Content-wise this is great, and that kinkmeme prompt was freakin awesome.
There are also quite a lot of sentence fragments, which are totally valid in thoughts of a character but in in narration should be avoided. For example, " Managing to avoid both Lori and the old man as they half rose from their seats. Jack-rabbiting towards the trail that led down towards the sheltered river bank they'd been using to wash up and do laundry since they'd made camp here in close to two weeks after abandoning the Green farm", is just two fragments in a row. I think these stand out mostly because there isn't both an object and a subject.
So if I were trying to rearrange something like that, I'd make sure squeeze in a "he" or a proper name for who you're referring to. There are several possibilities here. "He managed to avoid both Lori and the old as they half rose from their seats. Jack-rabbiting towards the trail that led down towards the river bank... , Glenn was too raod weary and low on supplies..." or combine them, "Managing to avoid both Lori and the old man as they half rose from thier seats, he jack-rabbited towards the trail..." If I combined the sentences I'd use a different verb that "jack-rabbiting" cause in the past tense it sounds like a harsh mouthful.
I didn't mean for that to be a whole like English lesson but it will make the writing smoother, but like I said above, I think it's totally fine to have fragments as thoughts.
That's my criticism, hopefully it helps you improve cause then your writing will be absolutely amazing! You have great content and characters :)
| MinuteCloser2Failing chapter 1 . 1/24/2012
I need an automatic "I LOVE THIS" review button for you because, like it's just like it sounds- I love every Glenn/Daryl centered story you write for the Walking Dead. So very very much.
Give me a chapter 2 now XD
| BungiePikachu chapter 1 . 1/24/2012
I am loving the thought process of Daryl and his metal imagery. I can't wait for more!
| Equal-Opportunity-Reader chapter 1 . 1/24/2012
Loved it! Just a few things, though.
1. "ten degree" Not sure if you mean the "tenth degree" here or not?
2. governments should be government's
3. "scared" all right and proper, should be scarred.
Otherwise, OMFG, I loved this! Captain do gooder, indeed.
The descriptions, just wonderful! It's not complete yet, is it? Hope not, otherwise, I'll just have to beg and beg for more!
| Laurie220 chapter 1 . 1/24/2012
please update soon i really like this so far protective Daryl is perfect