|Reviews for We are bound together|
| bahamut chapter 3 . 2/7/2012
Best chapter yet. Way to take it to 'em Tara. It's about time you updated, when I saw the "complete" thing by the story I was going to send you a strongly worded letter. :) Keep it up.
| bahamut chapter 2 . 1/29/2012
Much better! Another good tip is to visualize what you are writing. SEE what you're characters are doing in your mind and then explain it to us. It can be really hard because sometimes you're person is doing something you don't know how to explain. It can make it really exciting. For example, you wrote "...I was forcibly picked up by intense energy and I was pinned to the wall- it must have been him."
Another way to explain it would be this way, first see it in your mind like a movie, then write it. It could be like this. "An invisible, yet tangilbe force took me flinging me a crossed the room to the far wall. My torso hit first followed, painfully, by my face with a dull double thud. The rough granite grated against my skin and I gritted my teeth in the pained realization that this must be Kain's doing."
Or something. Anyways, much better. :)
| bahamut chapter 1 . 1/27/2012
The story is good but it's flawed not because of the idea or the story line rather because of the flow. It's hard to follow. My advice is to give it a few read overs after you've finished that way you can find mistakes and fix them. Also run the spell checker/grammer checker. Do this and you'll be golden.