|Reviews for And Justice for All|
| JJN37 chapter 7 . 4/14/2014
Well I can't wait for next week then so far I'm loving this fic and I can't wait to read more and I hope that tatsuki(don't know if I spelt that right) and ichigo start showing they're emotions for each other soon anyway great job keep it up :)
| Genericrandom chapter 5 . 7/16/2012
While I can certainly understand their point of view (especially when you consider how... quick and pointless it ended up being in one way) and frothing hatred, I for one kinda liked the Xcution arc because it reminded me of the good ol' pre-SS arc days. Back when this manga was more like Zombie Powder and less like Naruto. So I'm thrilled to find a fic that works it in. Good stuff. I also highly approve of using Tatsuki as a main character for the fic. She seemed like she was going to be such an awesome character, and even without powers she really could have added something to the manga even despite them spending so much of it in other worlds... but Kubo did so little with her! So I quite throughly like where you're going so far. Looking forward to seeing where you take this, it's shaping up to be a blast.
| Uruolki chapter 4 . 7/11/2012
Nice touch bringing in the dudes from Hell. Also, kudos on giving (technically, you've only hinted, but still) Tatsuki her own powers. I have no qualms over her becoming a shinigami, but it's nice when an author comes up with unique powers.
I'm enjoying the story so far, so keep it up. You're doing a really good job.
| nindjo chapter 4 . 7/7/2012
things are finally geting interesting imlooking forward to seeing were this story wil go please update soon
| EveryEye chapter 4 . 7/7/2012
I was ecstatic to see you've posted a new chapter, thereby proving that this story isn't dead! And it was awesome. The writing was great, and I'm definitely curious about the little teaser mysteries you're working into the plot. I *love* your characterization of Tatsuki and Ichigo both. I feel like I should have more to say, but really I'm just impatiently waiting for the next piece of the puzzle. Good work!
| EveryEye chapter 3 . 2/25/2012
Excellent job. You've definitely hooked me. Your version of powerless-Ichigo is fairly bitter, and I'm finding I like it. It makes *sense* given what we know about his hang ups over his ability to protect people.
My very favorite moment so far is the exchange between Rukia, Tatsuki, and Ichigo. I love that Tatsuki greets Rukia in a friendly manner, but is also blunt with her. I love that Ichigo actually makes the connection between hating his friends keeping him in the dark and what *he himself* did to Tatsuki. The whole Fullbring Arc I wanted to tear my hair out at how he angst-ed over his friends keeping him out of the loop and never, ever, thought to himself "Geez, I sure was an ass. I should apologize."
I'm also excited for the epic scale of this story. There aren't very many meaty stories out there that include Tatsuki in a big way and (given how this story is tagged) I'm looking forward to see how this story pans out, both as an ensemble piece, and with her in particular.
So good job and stuff! I can't wait to see more.
| infinityphoenix chapter 2 . 2/11/2012
Another chapter well done, Dobby, it was just super. And special. In fact, you could say it was super, awesome, and special. If only there was some way I could combine those adjectives, it would probably be hilarious.
Anyways, not much more to say than I did the last time. The chapter was a good length, you portrayed the characters well, and you left me eager for more. Can't wait until the next chapter, and the one after that for good measure. Until then, good job and keep up the good work.
| Six String Bard chapter 2 . 2/11/2012
Right, well, time to review chapter 2.
Off the bat, I noticed that the sentence structure is a bit different than the previous chapter. It is subtle, but nonetheless there. I could bring up reasons as to why it would be the case, but it'd be guesswork at best.
Another thing that became rapidly apparent is that your version of post-Mugetsu Ichigo is inwardly much more bitter about the loss of his powers; granted that's a fundamental loss of part of his character, but he seemed to take it a lot more in stride in 'canon.' Of course, he probably also had his doubts and bitter thoughts, but it didn't seem they were 'as bad.' The difference is probably just striking to me because of the change of scope in Ichigo's perspective - manga doesn't always allow for inner thoughts, while the written word alone can be used to convey much more.
In any case, it was an interesting change from what I'd expected, and I can say it's not really enough to determine whether it's a change for better or worse; I can easily see the former happening with your penchant for long term character development, but I do raise the point in case it was unintentional Flanderization.
Moving onto the rest of the Kurosaki household, I'd say they're pretty much in character: Isshin's Obfuscating Stupidity, and Yuzu and Karin are pretty much the same as they were at the beginning of the Lost Representative arc. I'm not generalizing your characterization of them, however. Just another observation.
As for the Urahara section, I'd have to say that was also fairly close to what I'd expect from the second best (or first best, I like Isshin a little better so that's subjective) Obfuscator in Karakura Town. Your description of the "person" he was talking to gave away who it was, but not immediately to those who don't recall certain key details. Not much to comment on that, however, other than the last scene completely validated my guess.
As for the last part of the chapter, I find Ichigo's use of swearing both in and out of his thoughts to be a little out of character. I know your writing style lends itself to a more mature medium, but Ichigo tends to be rather reserved in his speech unless he gets irritated, and then at best his language expands to use words like stupid and dumbass. Just another subjective observation, I suppose. The fact that he compares his very human teacher to Grimmjow is a bit much. It might be to stress the point, but I just felt it was somewhat weird.
Not much to say for Rukia's bit at the end, save for the title drop was a bit much. Another opinion.
From a technical standpoint, the amount of effort you've put into the chapter is readily apparent. You've put a lot of attention into detail, most paragraphs are just the right length to keep the pacing of the chapter good, and your characterization of the canon characters was good.
The only "problem," or nitpick, I suppose I would have from a technical standpoint is the slight overuse of dialogue tags. Not ones that punctuate a sentence with an action, like "scratched his chin," but ones that give inherent or subconscious imagery, like "sheepishly," "roared," and "grunted." They're fine once in a while, and though there isn't an abundance of them in your chapter, there were enough for me to make a note of it.
Granted, the above is all opinionated, but I figured I'd take this track instead of just sending in a couple of lines saying "Lol I liked it update soonz teh rockzors."
Until next time, you keep on staying classy, Dobbs.
| Culebra del Sol chapter 2 . 2/11/2012
This story is teasing my brain into a twizzler-shape.
The details, the foreshadowing, the all-around plot is so alluring.
I look forward to the next chapter.
| dalulzing chapter 1 . 1/30/2012
| Six String Bard chapter 1 . 1/28/2012
Aye lad, looking forward to the next chapter. Between what you'd published before and this new chapter, I can definitely say your writing has improved.
I do have a few things to point out, but they are mostly minor. The first thing that stood out to me was the mention of haori - specifically an Officer's and not a Captain's. Is this because of the far past aspect of the prologue, when Old Man Yama still had hair?
Another thing is that there seems to be a fair bit of Mood Whiplash going on within Fumiko; that is, she goes through a variety of emotions rather quickly. It is a little jarring, though understandable from what I've gleaned from the chapter - destruction and war, on a scale that'll be erased from history, a la One Piece's "Void century." But it's still worth noting she goes on a pretty rapid cycle of emotions.
And finally, I know that you're being faithful to the original language the manga is written in, but considering that you're writing this story in English and the majority of your readers will be reading it in the same language, it can be a little irritating to see the (surname ; first name) naming convention, as it's the opposite of what people have grown up with/grown accustomed to.
The usage of Old Man Yama's full name in a dialogue response is also something I feel like point out, particularly because it feels a bit awkward. Given that she [Fumiko] is alone in the ruins of the Shiba home, and you explicitly mention her mustering the strength to stand and see who had approached, you should start with the description, and then leave the dialogue tag at something like "Kuchiki-sama," Yamamoto/Genryusai (depending on how Fumiko sees him) said, yadda yadda.
I don't know about you, but having the full three name blast immediately prior to his dialogue tag isn't conducive to flow.
But I digress. I make points based on what I write and do as a fellow author, and you are free to act or ignore on those points and comments as you feel is appropriate. Constructive criticism and all that.
Until next time, you keep on staying classy, Dobbs.
| infinityphoenix chapter 1 . 1/27/2012
Well, I can honestly say that I'm looking forward to the next chapter of this story just as much (or maybe more than) the next chapter to the actual series itself. You're off to an excellent start, Dobby, and you have me hooked on the story already. That "no plot armor" bit in the beginning looks like it'll make things interesting, as does the mention of the mysterious enemies yet to come.
So, to put it in a few words: great job and keep up the good work.