There is such a beautiful realism in this brief sketch.
I can absolutely see this moment in time as if I were there.
Well done.

I absolutely adore this! The thought of Virgil being a wonderful father and husband is gorgeous!

Well done )

Very nicely done!

This is really very sweet. It's a snapshot of family life, and it works well as a short vignette. Sometimes baby fics or hurt/comfort fics or deathfics pack more punch the shorter they are; I like to be able to go away thinking about what I've just read, filling in the rest of the gaps myself before I'm hit over the head with too much angst or schmaltz.

The best bit for me is Virgil being slightly jealous of the baby's claim on his wife's err...lady lumps. "Her breasts are more his territory than mine."

And his wife knowing exactly what he's thinking!

And his broad chest, perfect for snuggling.

I don't normally seek out baby fics or hurt/comfort fics, but this was short and to the point and portrayed Virgil as a believably sexy man and great father.

If only men like him existed in real life! Oy.

T x

This is a very sweet piece and I think to make it longer would have spoiled ease us in and then with the hint of the sketchpad we know we are looking at things through Virgil's eyes. We also observe they are a very lucky couple - baby eats and goes back to sleep at the end - the perfect newborn. A perfect newborn fits the pace of what you have written.

There is only one small thing which interrupted the scene for me and one other thing that would have made it complete.

The one small thing - the fact that "she" looks UP at Virgil from the rocking chair. It needed a second read to clear it up. It gave me the vision he was in some sort of high bed. Originally I thought - wasn't the Father (didn't know it was Virgil at that point) lying down not standing? Then I assumed she was looking down preparing to feed the baby. I wondered if she'd looked OVER if it would have made it clearer. Only very minor but as I know you are seeking feedback I thought I would mention it.

The thing which would have made it complete for me? Her name. In a warm scene like this I wanted to associate her dark hair with a name. We get Virgil, we get baby Jason. We did not get to completely know "her"

Very nice though. Well done.

mcj

Very sweet and takes me back to 2am feeds with my first baby. Had to laugh at the mum thinking she might nit need to change the baby's nappy - real life experience with 4 kids...lol fat chance!

Aww that was so lovely. Loved this lost. I am working on my new story now and I am wondering if I should make my oc pregnant again or not. Bearing in mind that they have a 5 year old girl. Anyways this story is going into my favourite list. Thanks so much for sharing. Needed a bit of cheering up after the last review I just got.

Lots of love

Jo xxx