|Reviews for Five Things We Could Have Done|
| LA Knight chapter 1 . 3/9/2012
So I PM-ed you a few days ago asking about prompts and you responded politely and I was like, "She/he/they is/are soooooo nice! I'm gonna review something!" So I'm reviewing something for the awesomeness that is yourself. I've actually read all of your Rumbelle work, I'm pretty sure, although I'll check on that. Now I'm going to review a few things. Or maybe one thing. It depends because my husband is the one who posts my reviews at the library after I write them up on my comp and there are deadlines for that sort of thing. Le sigh.
So, I have to say I didn't quite like this at first because she didn't actually die in the Land of Once Upon a Time and Far, Far Away, and so I my automatic and stupid reaction was, "Gah, yet another person who hasn't done their research." I used to read a lot of Harry Potter and Lord of the Rings fics and that was a big problem most of the time. But then I was like, "Wait... no... no, that's not what this is. Well, I feel sheepish. This is really cool." And I felt really dumb for being so prejudiced, so I thought I'd fess up and let you know that at first I was an idiot but you have made me see the light! So kudos to you! Plus this piece is awesome. Sad, but awesome. Now, for the details!
There's something so melancholy about "When the wind blows, she feels her tower sway." So sad and lonesome and... maybe a bit wistful, I'm not sure. I don't really know why, can't really explain it, but in that single line, just for a moment I see this ivory-marble tower swaying in the wind, and at the same time I see this carefully balanced woman, tiptoeing the line of sanity and madness, also swaying in the wind that could knock her one way or the other.
Just so you know, I usually leave loooooooong reviews. Like, reviews that sometimes have to be broken in half or thirds. Sigh. I can't help myself. When I find something brilliant, I have to heap praises on it. It's my nature.
Anyway, I love this description right here: "the agony marks and mating calls of firebrands and magics on her face." That's just gorgeous. Every so often in a fic, usually a short fic, I'll find a line that I'm just like, "Whoa. I've never seen this particular thing described that way. Cool." And here it is. D
I have a question, just because I'm mentally deficient. This line. "Her body is clean. Because she did not. Because she had not. "Marriage," she'd whispered, so they destroyed only the thing that destroyed them." Did/had not what? My mind is leaning towards the idea that the clerics think she had sex with Rumpelstiltskin, and the marriage-thing is referencing the whole "Will you marry me, Beauty?" from the original faerie tale, but I'm not 100% sure so I wanted to ask what that was about.
It took me a bit to realize she'd jumped off the tower. I felt a little dumb, but it was beautifully and peacefully written that I didn't realize what had happened. Although now I want to yell at her, "Do not go gently into that good night!" But that's neither here nor there. "See her kiss the earth." As if she didn't just plummet to her death. This part actually kind of reads like Rumpelstiltskin thinking. You know how sometimes someone will see a dead loved one, and they look so peaceful that the person is like, "They could almost be sleeping." That's the kind of feeling I get from the last 3 paragraphs.
It's beautiful. I love it. Sad, though. So sad. And a beautiful combination of "Rapunzel" and "Beauty and the Beast."
Not as poetic as Crescent, but it's harder to be poetic when there's romance and joy and no angst, depression, or pent-up sexual frustration, I've found. But it's still so ADORABLE!
I mean, it's wonderful. So cute. Although if she's that pregnant, wouldn't she waddle? Just curious. This isn't so much a nitpick as a question about how pregnant Belle really is. But I love "happily swollen belly." Right there, you as the reader get how they both feel about the baby that's coming. Yay! Baby-happiness! And "it's the most enjoyable beating he has ever received." Considering he remembers everything of his life as Rumpelstiltskin, that's saying something. )
They know it's a girl? Awww! Good! That means he'll have had a boy AND a girl! D
"...the words are so simple, but somehow they trip and tangle." Sooooo cute! It's a great description of the emotions he's feeling, without it being overly dramatic or lame. I love it.
I love the secret kiss thing. It's so cute! And kind of Peter-Pan-ish, but that's not a bad thing. I love it. So adorable.
He's charming sugar cubes to dance? Golly, he must be bored. Or he's doing it strictly so he can stare at her behind. Which is hilarious, either way.
"What a considerate young idiot that one had been." Yeah, seriously. Surely he had to know Rumpel was reading Belle's mail? What a moron. *face-palm* He deserved the rose-thing. Especially because, since it's Gaston, he's a murderer, womanizer, whoremonger, and all-around creep. Probably abusive, too. Blargh.
That's hilarious that he's excited over getting to see her butt in the air. That's so cute. And so boyish. Lol.
*Ham, Rye, Possibly Pickle*
Quick question before I review the awesomeness of this part. Does Belle actually have blue eyes? Because I've seen the episode only once, so... yeah. I've read blue, but I've also read gray and I've also read green-blue. So is it just blue? And does her nose really do that little wrinkling thing?
Okay, onto the actual review.
"When Rumpelstiltskin closes his eyes, he sees tangles upon tangles of bitter gold thread." I love this line, just because it's beautiful and dark and a bit sad, I think, because of the whole "bitter gold." This whole piece actually reads a bit like it's comedic, but that single line is sad, yet it fits perfectly.
Um... didn't Regina get the Curse (or should I say The Curse) from Maleficent? Did Maleficent get it from Rumpel?
I love this line! "...searing, acrid daylight has somehow gotten all over his nice dark library!" That's hilarious. I love it so much. He's just like, "Sunlight! Meh!"
And I also adore that she's not afraid of him, even when he flicks sparks at her and stuff. She's just like, "You're not scary. Silly man. Now eat."
"... and all his thoughts fall away like birds in a storm. Petals from a rose. Wind from the willows." I love this. It's poetic and lovely and sweet without being saccharine or gross. I adore it. I adore your writing. It's fantastic.
"One moment he is at his table, the next he is an oh-so-lovely stockings' length away." Oh, so not only does he adore her backside in "Letters," but he also adores her legs, too. Lol. He's so into her, it's adorable. I love it. There is a perfect blend of romantic/adorable and romantic/depressing in this collection.
Is her booted foot hovering over his crotch? Just curious.
*Things That Burn*
"Belle sleeps in the belly of the earth. Where he slept once. The space is the same. Changed, but not different. She can still smell sweat, unwashed leather. And magic, magic, magic—thick and fat and heady like a headache. And she'd been told, once upon a time, that he'd died. She'd been told he touched a finger to the so-sharp tip of his spinning wheel and fell asleep for a thousand years. She'd been told he drank poison, ate curses, cut himself on the name of his knife."
OH. MY. GOSH. What am I supposed to SAY to this? How am I supposed to praise this? It's so beautiful and perfect and lovely, what am I supposed to say, Cyprith? How do I survive the beauty of this? Hmmm? I love the thing about the Sleeping Beauty curse - Maleficent's name being dropped and the prick of the finger on the spinning wheel. I have to ask you, have you ever read Francesca Lia Block's writing? It's beautiful and lavish like yours. If you haven't, you should, especially her book The Rose and the Beast - it's an anthology of faerie tale adaptations (no Rumpelstiltskin, sadly, but Beauty and the Beast is in there, as is Snow White and Sleeping Beauty).
I love this piece and how it's all about the power of words. The power of listening and the power of silence, the power of knowledge and the power of speaking. I love it so much. It reminds me a bit of a Rapunzel story I read called "The Girl in the Attic," which is also about the power of silence versus speaking. This piece is amazing. She learns how to listen, and with listening and silence, which are seen as passive, she gains the power of knowledge and spoken words, and frees herself from the prison.
And I love how this touches on brief bits of other tales - Sleeping Beauty with the spindle, a bit of Snow White with the drinking poison and eating curses, and a bit of Rumpel's own new legend with the name; the Wild Swans with her silence and the Arabian Nights with "the end of a thousand stories that never were;" the Snow Queen with "her hands into claws, her nails into diamonds, her name into ice;" Hansel and Gretel with the end, "Her feet find the path her heart knows." I love this so MUCH!
Jeez, Cyprith. You are my favorite author in this fandom. Seriously. I adore your work forever. Please keep writing stuff. Please, I beg you, please. You rock my socks.
And I have to go now because I think it's time for the library trip (we don't have internet at home). So hopefully I'll be able to review more of your stuff laters. D And I plan on trying to find Tumblr, whatever that is, and leaving prompts, too. XD I'm so excited!
- LA Knight
| Gin chapter 1 . 2/15/2012
That was absolutely lovely! Each part was a joy to read.
| Skyrere chapter 1 . 2/14/2012
your vision of Belle and Gold is so deep and expansive that it swollows me whole.
| The.Lost.Thoughts chapter 1 . 2/13/2012
I love it. I love the rhythm to the words and the imagery. That is all.
| Shu of the Wind chapter 1 . 2/13/2012
This is beautiful. Just...asdfklsjla.
| kitashvi chapter 1 . 2/13/2012