|Reviews for Harry Potter The Veil of Time|
| Why chapter 5 . 8/21/2015
Who actually likes rooting for a complete moron? Why would you dumb your character down this much?
| Guest chapter 6 . 8/18/2013
| bill560682 chapter 15 . 6/10/2013
now if i were the weasley twins i would be trying to make as many contacts at these other schools as i could. finding out from these student who the pranksters at their schools are will triple your sales of prank items. an if i was the twins i would have made some kind of cheer candy for the world cup and sold it to everybody. the cheer candy when slipped into someones food or drink would only allow them to cheer for whichever team the candy was set for, such as krum's fans would buy the ones based on krum and slip them into irish fans food or drinks and thereby for the next 5 hours every time the person opened their mouth to speak they ended up cheering for krum. that idea would have made the twins a ton of money at the world cup as well as tons more from quittich fans around the world for years to come. making 10,000 galleons at the world cup would have been easy since people would be buying these 10, 20, 50 at a time with the plan to drug the other teams fans. you figure the twins got to the camp ground at about 9 a.m. an the game would not start till about 9 p.m. so they would have 12 hours to sell cheer candy's so that is less then 1,000 an hour total and if we add in lee jordan that is 3 sellers so they need to sell less then 300 an hour each, an since they are selling 10, 20, 50 at a time to one person 300 an hour is easy. you could also use this same idea for the tournament of selling them to hogwarts students to drug the other schools so they all cheer for hogwarts. an if you start selling these cheer candies to quittich fans around the world by owl order you would pull in a million galleons a year easy since the fans will need them for every single game to drug the other teams fans.
the only thing i ask is i get credit for the cheer candies since i have never seen them used in fan fic before.
| bill560682 chapter 14 . 6/10/2013
now since harry did live threw the killing curse i would think he would look into it. now the way i see the killing curse working is hate pumps up it's power level of your spell to match your max normal max level. an since all wizards are more or less the same level the killing curse is able to eat up your magic and you die from lack of magic. now how harry lived threw the killing curse is simple voldimorte can draw magic from his followers threw the dark mark and harry was marked as he equal so harry has tommy boys magic level plus what ever tom can pull from his followers and thereby his total power level was to great for voldimorte to overcome. the only problem with this idea is no one who would fit as being powerful enough to survive a killing curse from a very weak wizard is willing to test it.
i would think things like pain curses would work along the same line but on the mind tricking the mind into thinking it is in pain. if pain curses in fact lit up every nerve ending in your body to the max you would pass out from overload so the pain curses would have to be programmed to figure out how much pain you could take without passing out and only trick the brain into thinking it is being hit with that amount, because anyone hitting you with a pain curse would hate to have to stop every 10 seconds to wake you back up. so of course anyone with mind shields would be hit by the curse with more power to overcome those shields because of course the desire to see someone in pain would boost the power of the curse. hence the reason snape who has mind shields still ends up in pain when hit by such a curse.
now as far as harry slacking off in class you have already covered in the fact he gets a free pass this year as a result of the tournament. you can not have the people in such a tournament worried about school tests.
| bill560682 chapter 13 . 6/10/2013
now harry would be in love with ginny but the reason is why? as was told in cannon molly used love potion to get a husband and even told ginny about it so is that the reason harry is in love with ginny or was it simply he did end up falling for her on his own, the world may never know. was it true love or love potion done by molly or ginny or both?
| bill560682 chapter 3 . 6/9/2013
one thing i do not like about most harry potter stories is they never have sirius make mention of his time on the run? he is a wizard so he would have no problem changing his looks so he looked like a 60 year old asian woman or 50 year old white man or a 12 year old black female with warning charms placed on the floo and the front door of his family home to let him know when someone shows up he could spend 90% of his time on the run in fact having fun. an whenever the warning charms go off that someone has showed up he just pops back home to his room upstairs and no one knows the difference.
| bill560682 chapter 2 . 6/9/2013
in the 100 days show they found
nanites that controlled aging
would they not be able to give
these to thor and the controller
for it so they could have each
clone live to say a million years
old. that way they could live long
enough to fix the problem with
the cloning? they could then take
any of their people in storage out
and have 10 times if not 100 times
more people and thereby ships to
fight the bugs? also they could
likely spare some people to keep
a closer eye on the snakes as well.
an yes i know they needed to die
so they could give everything they
were in the form of the super ship
to the sgc to fight the ori, but if
there is no vala then there is no
ori to worry about. an the only
reason vala was brought into the
show other then to be mother to
the orisi was to be the one to get
the blame for touching things she
should not. daniel can only do
that so many times before jack
would shoot him in the head or
the general would ground him
from all off world missions.
personally i think it would have
happened by end of season 2 or
end of season 3 at the latest. i
think thore's people need to take
a page from carters play book
and start blowing up suns, if they
can figure out a way to take a sun
from normal to boom in say 1.3
seconds you send in a remote
controlled cargo ship in near the
sun and then drive it right into it.
1.3 seconds later no more
replacators in that solar system.
an yes i know that would wipe out
the ida gallaxy but the
replacators are already doing
as to the show were the tokra are
going to poison the system lords i
think it would be better if the
poison were slow acting and was
airborn as it's form of transfer
from snakehead to snakehead
with a lifespan of 2 years from the
first use. this way every system
lord ends up infecting their
troops and at the end of the 2
years the virus attacks the
snakeheads everywhere killing
them then dies off. if you only
attack the system lords
themselves you are only taking
them out then minor system lords
take their place an even if you
take out all the system lords the
baby snakeheads in the jaffa will
grow up into adult snakeheads
sooner or later so you are only
slowing them down for a
moment. this way everyone of
them are dead an all you need to
do is go planet to planet
collecting the children who have
no baby snakehead in them yet
and have thore's people change
their D.N.A. so they never end up
needing a baby snakehead.
in the show were daniel tells
catherin her long lost boyfriend
may still be alive and the general
chews him out for it i think daniel
should bitch slap him and remind
him who in fact owns the stargate
namely catherin. catherin in the
movie was running the program
not the goverment. so she could
walk in at any time and order the
general to pack up everything.
as far as the ori go the ancients
should have more powerful ships
then them. the reason being what
the ori 'gods' know is limited. if it
was not then they would have
attacked the milky way and ida
gallaxies years ago, until stupid
vala and daniel showed up in the
ori home gallaxy they had no clue
there was other life out there.
which means as far as tech goes
they stopped building better stuff
once they all ascended which
likely happened shortly after the
first ones showed their 'super
god' powers to the rest. so as long
as you keep the fight out of the ori
gallaxy were the ascended ori can
strengthen their troops you can
beat them every time. you figure
the ori ascended 1 million years
ago maybe even as long as 5
million years ago so that is a long
time to come up with new tech.
an when ever you run into a
system lord do not stop to talk
and NEVER shoot his guards first
ALWAYS put a bullet right into the
system lord's head then put 10
more. then kill his guards, then
toss his body into the nearest sun.
| bill560682 chapter 1 . 6/9/2013
now personally not a big fan of time travel fics. because they try to drag out the story by having harry stay with cannon timeline. i think it would be better to have harry take out the horcluxes before even first year and get sirius free before then as well. then as a result harry can have 7 happy years at hogwarts or in this stories case you can move him to america so he can meet jack or sam an if he meets jacks son he could end up saving him from getting a bullet to the head. you could have harry be doing yard work or something at jacks house an he comes upon charley with jacks gun just before charley shoots himself.
| A W chapter 15 . 6/8/2013
Obscenely slow paced, and never actually gets to the cross-over part. Most decent writers do the set up (prologue) in the first chapter, two at a maximum, I don't even want to try and count how many you used. Even though you listed it as a crossover, it is just a sub-par time travel fic.
| kjkh chapter 15 . 3/15/2013
great story, please continue
| DragonRayne1205 chapter 6 . 2/25/2013
Your story is very well written. I enjoy your imagery, it is very well thought out and in depth.
| fraewyn chapter 15 . 1/6/2013
Can't wait for more!
| falseproffitt chapter 14 . 11/5/2012
your story makes no since at all
| The Eye of Re chapter 8 . 10/21/2012
Harry is amazingly complacent when it comes to his own skills. So, he beat Voldemort through luck and was a middling sixth year student, and he thinks this means he doesn't need to develop his magical skills?
I hope this timeline's Voldemort crushes him.
| RoughIslandSunrise chapter 15 . 10/7/2012
Intresting... cant wait to see what happens next