Reviews for I Just Want to be Happy
shadow-kissed angel chapter 9 . 5/18/2014
Ceasar-Flickerman chapter 9 . 3/16/2013
It's been FOREVER, AND you left with that! UPDATE.
She Who Must Not Be Named 77 chapter 6 . 9/3/2012
Please, please update! I'd really love it if you finished this story, it's still one of my favourites of all time! PLEASE. I'LL SEND YOU VIRTUAL COOKIES!
juggalet135 chapter 9 . 6/2/2012
this chapter was jst sooo sad i almost started crying
Aura chapter 9 . 5/3/2012
I must say you writing is really can you please update this story I would really like to k ow what happens next
nothing-something chapter 9 . 4/9/2012
Hey there,

I'm not going to flame you, but this isn't going to be a positive review. Feel free to take my comments on board, or ignore them.

First off, this story is unrealistic. I know Harry Potter is a magical fantasy universe and whatnot, but the situations in 'I Just Want To Be Happy' are often too dramatic or corny to be taken seriously. People don't talk the way you've imagined Lucy and her friends to; things don't really occur in that pattern.

Take this storyline, for example: Lucy is a secretly-amazing orphan singer, who has no friends except for Lily, and is in love with Sirius Black. Sirius is dating Shania, whose twin sister Meaghan spread a rumour that Sirius cheated on Shania with Lucy, who also happens to be her worst enemy. Sirius is so upset by this that he... asks Lucy to be his fake girlfriend?

Now, Lucy has been in the same school as Sirius and James for 7 years and she thinks that Sirius doesn't know her first name. Because of her so-called terrible temper, she has no friends - yet miraculously she becomes 'cute, sweet, sassy, funny and pretty much perfect' in the eyes of the handsome, promiscuous and popular Sirius Black in the space of a few days. She's SO wonderful and amazing that James goes as far as to tell the love of his life that there's a '99% chance that he could fall for her'. Coming from a best friend, that totally means a lot.

See, sometimes this 'discovery of awesomeness' can be cool, but there's gotta be some reasoning behind it; some substance to the change of heart. Like, if a vault was going to fall on Sirius' head and Lucy pushed it away with her super strength or something, THAT could be a pretty eye-opening discovery, you know? So, that's a dumb example. Even something as stereotypical as... I dunno, Sirius overhearing Lucy singing or something and getting trapped in her spell? You know what I mean?

It just seems like everything happens for no reason other than it's dramatic. Like, suddenly Lucy's talking about how hard her life has been (and to be honest, you didn't really describe it painfully enough to warrant James and Sirius' responses), and then she's running around in the rain, then she's telling Sirius she loves him, and then she's trying to kill herself. And in this magical world, wouldn't Lily be able to do a little more than scream 'NOOOOO!' when her best friend was attempting suicide?

Do you see the inconsistencies here?

Another thing; the way you've written out the story makes it sound like the whole of Hogwarts has nothing better to do than watch Sirius carry on with his petty affairs. Every single eye in the hall was on Lucy in that shouting match between Shania and Sirius? Seriously? How come the teachers didn't intervene during that fiasco? I somehow doubt McGonagall would be too interested in her students' love lives. Don't these people have anything better to do than watch Sirius and James make out with their girls?

Also, you seriously set things up in big words, then let them down. It's like there's going to be a fireworks show and you set off a sparkler.

"I got back to the common room and all hell broke loose." In a time when there's a noseless, snake-faced serial killer running around, you'd think these people would have a description of 'hell' better than some girl ranting for a bit and then tugging on Lucy's hair. Honestly? Surely you could've come up with better than that.

Everything is too fast-paced and unrealistic. It's like one of those soap operas you watch while drunk.

I'm not going to knock this story down completely. I think, if you cleaned things up, rounded out the characters and made the happenings more realistic, you could have something killer. I wouldn't have read through the entire story (rolling my eyes several times, I must admit) and then reviewed if I didn't think there was some point to it.

So, please don't feel bad in reading this. I've taken the stories I had on fanfiction down for the moment, but the first thing I wrote was complete rubbish. It's embarrassing to even think about it. I never even read through them before putting them online, and the first chapters were basically 600 words of some chick crying and cutting herself. I got reviewers being nice with stuff like 'omg most amazing thing I've eva read', 'made me cry, your writing is soooo beautifu'. Then I'd actually look over the work I'd done and think... how ignorant do people have to be to think that thing's any good? I think false praise is much more painful than honesty. At least with honesty, you strive to improve.

Keep at it, Abby :) Read over your work again and again. When YOU'RE satisfied that you've milked out the best thing you can do, send it for the world to see.

Yours truly,

Dreamofakiss xx

(feel free to reply)
sunburnesd chapter 9 . 4/4/2012
Sithhrtuyyrhxekjbsqty... I dont know how to feel about this. Update soon cx
Alice Williams chapter 9 . 4/4/2012

- Alice 3
She Who Must Not Be Named 77 chapter 9 . 4/4/2012
Dude! You don't know how frightened I am/was! Siriusly, I'm crying! Now hurry up and update again(thanks for being regular :D), I WANNA KNOW WHAT HAPPENS!
Rose Jean Black chapter 9 . 4/3/2012
... I don't like this chapter. I find suicide stupid. And just because one guy mmm no. Ok, Sirius is incredible, handsome, fun and sexy but he didn't even said no to her feelings. Looking forward the next chapter to see how it goes. I didn't like this chapter but I'm sure the next will be better. Love, a fan.
Guest chapter 9 . 4/2/2012
Arg! Stupid cliff hanger! I can't wait to see what happens! Please please please PLEASE update soon!
She Who Must Not Be Named 77 chapter 8 . 4/2/2012
Freaking awesome! But what's with the slashes?
Rose Jean Black chapter 8 . 4/2/2012
Dammit! Is too short! Please update something soon! We are dying!
She Who Must Not Be Named 77 chapter 7 . 4/2/2012
This is a MASTER piece! I'm just confused at one part, I thought Lucy's(btw, she's an AMAZING character) parent died?
Rose Jean Black chapter 7 . 4/1/2012
update soon please! I want to know how it ends!
25 | Page 1 2 Next »