Reviews for His Body
MyAibou chapter 4 . 6/29/2012
I think you captured Paulina pretty well, especially hitting on the irony of her crush on Danny Phantom while simultaneously having disdain for Danny Fenton. She's gonna kick herself if she ever finds out the truth...
MyAibou chapter 3 . 6/29/2012
A little gushy for Sam, but given how she was in Fanning the Flames when she was kind of mooning over him, I can't say it's OOC. I like the concern they have for each other.
MyAibou chapter 2 . 6/29/2012
I often wonder what Mr. Lancer thinks and how much he knows. He's so often played for laughs or as the obnoxious authority figure, but TotY convinced me there's much more to him than that. I think you captured him well, too.
MyAibou chapter 1 . 6/29/2012
Nice. I'm a mom, so I really feel for all the parents in DP. In some ways, even more after they learn the truth. But you captured Maddie before she knows very well, I think.
HappyFestus chapter 14 . 6/2/2012
Have you thought about doing their thoughts after Phantom Planet?
HaiJu chapter 11 . 5/9/2012
I like this one a lot. The change in writing style is a nice touch, and Clockwork, who has perhaps the most informed perspective of all, makes a great ending for this kind of outside-observer fic. Talking about it in terms of the improbable is interesting and pretty cool. I mean, I guess it would have to be a pretty improbable scenario to catch the attention of the master of all time. Nicely done.

HaiJu chapter 9 . 5/9/2012
Heh, I like this. Jack mistranslating Danny's alarm/terror as interest is great. And that net is downright sadistic, wow. Would not want to be on the wrong end of that thing...

HaiJu chapter 8 . 5/9/2012
I like this one with Dash much better, actually. The way he's relating everything Danny does to make himself look better (he's in detention more than I am, he's more bored than me, he's a crappier student than me) is a very interesting way to let Dash be observant without being particularly smart. The assumption that human guinea pig horrific bladder control is hilarious. XD

HaiJu chapter 4 . 5/7/2012
Hmm, okay, I'm still only on Chapter 4, but I'm going to review now.

Ch. 1 - Weirded me out. His mom was sneaking a peek at his rippling muscles? I get that she's worried about the bruises, but her end conclusion seems to be that Danny's a hunk. Oookay then.

Ch. 2 - Much more interesting. This was more complex and I felt like you handled Lancer's inner monologue well. I liked his observations of how the two acted as support (maybe literally) for Danny and the little bit at the end where Danny acknowledges Lancer's offer to help. Nice work.

Ch. 3 - This was sweet and kinda cute...but...rippling muscles? Again?

Ch. 4 - I can't say I liked this. Paulina is self-absorbed and unobservant, yes. But the thing about shallow characters is that they can have unintentional insight. Or you should at least try as a writer to bring some sort of purpose into her shallowness, even if it's only through the actions of other characters that she sees but doesn't understand. So I guess what I'm trying to say is that this isn't out of character, but I don't feel like it accomplished anything.

jeanette9a chapter 14 . 4/27/2012
I wonder how Nocturne, Dan and the Observers see him.

Silver Crossbow chapter 14 . 4/26/2012
Have you done ember yet? She is one of my favorite villens. Or maybe the box ghost or klemper (spelling?) wolf would be an interesting one also
Shadowshine2016 chapter 6 . 4/22/2012
This is one of the harder characters to write for, but it seems rushed. Still interesting and worth reading, but a little rushed.
Shadowshine2016 chapter 4 . 4/20/2012
I love it. You got each character spot on so far. Can't wait to read on
Ann E. Casap chapter 13 . 4/4/2012
These are good shorts about Danny Phantom through another's eyes. I loved them all. Great work.
jeanette9a chapter 13 . 3/29/2012
you did Dani ans Skulker! Awesome! -,-

that makes me wonder that Freakshow thinks.
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