|Reviews for Stop This Train|
| beautifulme chapter 1 . 2/7/2013
| Bianca chapter 1 . 6/3/2012
wow this is just great. I can so picture this happening after the book. I loved this, you seriously captured Holden and the way he is/speaks/acts spot on. Sounds just like him. I liked the friend you created for him too. Good job miss:)
| Reviewer chapter 1 . 4/22/2012
It seems that you've grasped Holden's most common phrases and his overall tone, but this piece, while mimicking Holden's speech some what accurately (some motifs of the boys narration are injected to frequently), lacks Holden's mindset. In addition to this, your composition is without the candid observations that have marked Salinger's work as a treasured classic. As a young writer you should have something that you'd like to communicate, or at least an idea of something Holden would have uttered in his train of thought.
I have only read the first few paragraphs of your work, so I could have went a whole lot more in depth with this critique if I read it all, but I am sure of what I have already observed.
I know this is only an English assignment and that in the classroom this will be rewarded an A, but try to remember that writing possesses many more facets than engrossing dialogue and dramatic writers write because they want to convey something or because they are ardent about this type of work.
Thank you for submitting and keep on writing,
| lucyjoan chapter 1 . 3/26/2012
There is no other word to describe this except brilliant. You captured Holden's speaking style so brilliantly, I honestly felt like I was reading a continuation of Salinger's book. One thing though, Jane kept her kings in the back row, in checkers. Pawns are in chess.
| Victoria636 chapter 1 . 3/5/2012
This is amazing looch! I LOVE IT 3 Please write more fanfictions! I'll leave you a review every time. ;)
| HisOnly1xo chapter 1 . 2/28/2012
Oh Wow! This was amazing, Holden was so perfectly in character. Sounds just like he would talk and think, so good, hope you write more stories in the future!