|Reviews for Akatsuki Kitten: Phoenix Corporation Overhaul|
| BeatriceParadisio chapter 6 . 12/27/2014
I know this is a parody and you're trying to make fun of all the bad stories or there, but breaking the fourth wall? Really? Even in a parody that's annoying and really makes me want to stop reading. I won't since I'm interested to see what you do next, but yuck.
Also you need to check your grammar when it comes to dialogue. You consistently use full stops (ie periods) before your final quotation mark despite following it up with a speaking verb. Look up the rule if that doesn't make sense, but since you asked for reviews with feedback that's probably the biggest thing you should change.
Also don't assume your readers will know what you're abbreviations mean. What is EE? I've never heard of anything abbreviated like that for something related to school work (jade mentions it to the cats at one point). I'm assuming it's a regional thing or perhaps something that is specific for an area of study, but in all my years of school I again have never run across something that could be abbreviated that way. So unless you're certain it's a universal abbreviation don't use it.
Finally I like that you have you're fictional self acting as a godlike figure to guide the story, but i wish the characters weren't as directly contacted with them add they are in this chapter. I don't know many of the things your referencing and it really hasn't mattered up to this point, but now it seems to be taking over a good chunk of the story. It no longer seems like a parody of the cat stories but just a way for you to write in all your previous characters. And that's not really a huge problem so long as you're up front about it, but I was under the assumption that this story wad focused on the cats and your one OC not a whole bunch of characters from other universes and stories.
| Missingwings chapter 20 . 7/19/2014
Hey, was SaphiraEragon's profile/story taken down for some reason? I can't find it. Can you send me a link or something?
| Veedramon chapter 4 . 7/17/2014
I don't care about your Ocs, I barely tolerated them. But I like kittens.
| Veedramon chapter 3 . 7/4/2014
Is hard to get in the story with all the interruptions.
| Veedramon chapter 2 . 7/4/2014
I honestly don't care about the OCs save for Jade.
| Veedramon chapter 1 . 7/4/2014
Okay, gotta hate the PTB...
| The Lazy Bitch chapter 17 . 6/25/2014
Poor Tobi and Hidan... will you make them listen to the ten hour versions too? XD
| The Lazy Bitch chapter 16 . 6/16/2014
The idea where and agent replaces Kakashi! :D
... Hopefully Nightingale (Plz?). ._.
| The Lazy Bitch chapter 15 . 6/15/2014
Sasori x books... that could actually work. ._.
| The Lazy Bitch chapter 14 . 6/15/2014
I can't say I like Diamond, but I LOVE the other agents so I think it makes up for that. .u.
| The Lazy Bitch chapter 13 . 6/14/2014
I LOVED the fan wank. It was awesome. :3
| The Lazy Bitch chapter 11 . 6/8/2014
Jashin's awesome. :3
| The Lazy Bitch chapter 10 . 6/7/2014
Yeah, you're a butt monkey. ]:
But the readers, me included, still love you! :D
| The Lazy Bitch chapter 9 . 6/7/2014
I know how you feel. I almost choked on seaweed once. ]:
... Don't ask. OTL
| The Lazy Bitch chapter 8 . 6/5/2014
But you DO have a TvTropes page. That's how I found this story. .-.