|Reviews for Beyond the Terms of Contract|
| Ale chapter 1 . 10/28/2012
Aw, you really make me like this 'pairing'. I can never see it being healthy, but it is kinda cute in a sad, broken sort of way :( But this is really well written and made me consider their relationship (which is something I never even considered before reading your fics).
I really did like this fic, and I agree that I don't see that relationship quite working right or at least not being very healthy. But the problems and angst def make it interesting to read.
Thank you for being such an awesome fic writer and for giving me something to think about.
| AnotherSassyGayMan chapter 1 . 10/4/2012
This story has potential, but the chronological organization is jarring. The way that remembered events abruptly interject the present is distracting, and the flashbacks themselves seem rushed. The relationship itself between Isono and Kaiba is interesting, as far as the idea of Kaiba having sexual desires for Isono due to unhealthy reasons. Also of note is that Isono isn't of the same mind.
The voice is unclear sometimes, regarding whether it is Isono or Kaiba centric, particularly in the last sentence of the final paragraph, for instance. The narrative occasionally rambles beyond the point of style and to the degree that it requires effort to follow, which is bad for story flow.
There is also the point of some grammatical errors, such as use of "upwards" instead of "upward", etc. This is a minor complaint, but since you seem to be attempting to be verbose and grammatically sound, I assumed you would appreciate the advice.
On a cultural note: Isono would never call Kaiba "Seto", only "Seto-sama". I assume from your use of the Japanese names and Isono's behavior regarding his position as an employee that you are attempting to stay true to the Japanese cultural aspect.
Also, I understand that you're attempting to show that Kaiba is more openly vulnerable with Isono, but it comes off as out of character for him to speak in a "hesitant, fragmented voice" under such circumstances. He's been rejected by someone he trusts and unhealthily sexualizes, and it's more likely that Kaiba would respond by being withdrawn or cold than showing any signs of conflict or weakness.
This seems like a conglomerate of ideas that weren't brought to fruition. I would like to see this story longer, even as a one-shot, with more organization and better plotted chronology. It's not believable that Kaiba would want a sexualized father figure in Isono without some solid insight into his psychology, at least within the canon of the fic. The tone and writer's voice are entertaining, but the rambling nature needs to be reigned in some and the sequence of events shouldn't jump around so much. With some editing, this story could be very solid and entertaining.
| yllimilly chapter 1 . 5/21/2012
So yes, tonight is catching up with review duty, because I'm starting to be one of those invisible readers who don't leave a trace and I don't like it.
This is my favorite piece of yours so far. You know when I started reading, I had happily readied myself for a slash fic, and found that I was more than happy that it didn't turn out to be that kind of fic in the end.
There are so many things I'd like to say about that fic but I have stage fright I think. It was just so good and the tension was even throughout and there was just the right amount of reveal and not-reveal and duh why aren't we writing or even just speculating more about Kaiba's relationship with his closest bodyguard?
Isono's ambivalence felt really realistic and moving. I just loved all of this.
| Glitter and Kisses chapter 1 . 3/22/2012
DAMN. Hot damn. I don't know how to give a decent review, I swear, but I absolutely adored it. Such great characterization, unique setting, unique pairing... hsdvkjaggv I love this pairing, I love the way you pulled it off, Seto being Seto, Isono's hesitance and ambivalence... fantastic.
| Jonouchi Katsuya chapter 1 . 3/19/2012
This is really beautiful. I wish I had more words to express how much I love it.
| TeacupSquid chapter 1 . 3/16/2012
This is perfect guardshipping yes ;_; I especially liked the part about Seto wanting Isono *because* he's sort of like a father figure. It just fits with my shippy headcanons and stuff. And Isono's little lecturing was the best, all fatherly and super uncomfortable in just the right way.
I love all of the different ways you approach Seto's sexuality. Here, he seemed like such a typical teenager what with the hormones and CRAVINGS, even considering the off-kilter sexualization of his relationship with Isono. The way Seto tried to seduce him, all deliberate and stiff and straightforward and AWKWARD, and the way he was scolded into stopping was just aRGH ;-; the best. You're the best.
Their relationship is so dysfunctional and lopsided but THAT'S MY FAVORITE. The affection they hold for one another is just dsgkestasksgh ramble spit froth it's just great okay. You're great, your writing is great, I feel great for having read it, the world is great because you're in it. /cries